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Posted (edited)

Hi everyone, this is my first post. I was dating this girl for about 3 months

And we really hit it off. We both told eachother we were falling for eachother

Then she ended it quickly because she said she felt judged and

Like she wasn't doing enough. I questioned her about an ex she

Is best friends with( they were long time friends before they slept

Together) I said I understood and I thought everything was fine.

The thing is we still talk and hang out once and a while. I really

Like her and I don't know how to tell her and she gives me mixed

Signals. She says she ended it too early but doesn't know if she

Would date me again. I'm heartbroken but trying to stay strong.

I feel like we could have something great. I'm just being patient

But it's been 3 months since we were intimately close. Not just

Sex. I'm 33 and I have options to date other people but I can

Only think about her.

Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks

Edited by Simple love
Spelling mistake
Posted

My advice, which obviously is subject to scrutiny as only you know the situation... Stop talking with her at all. If she is near your age (I'm 31) then any woman that would end it so quickly without much dialogue is unpredictable at best. 3 months isn't long enough to even get out of the

"Honeymoon" phase. Cut your losses and move on, if she really wanted to be with you then she would be.

 

Again though that would be what I did in that situation.

  • Author
Posted

Thanks, she just turned 25. I've been through

Some rough times and when I really care

About someone I have a hard time letting go

. I also been single for 5 years from a 7 year

Relationship and she's the first girl I've thought

I could be with. The older I get it seems

To be harder to find someone. Ive learned to

Be on my own so I know I will be alright.

I've been in true love before and I think it's

Few and far between so I hold on to it.

She has a lot of friends and is caring so

I think that's why she wants to keep being

Friends. I'm just going to try and be mature

I don't want to say never talk to me again

I think I'll tell her that I still have feelings for her

Then she'll use her discretion and not tell me

About new dates. Although she tells me she is not

Dating. I feel better getting this off my chest.

By the way. I really loved the girl I was in the

7 year relationship with. It crushed me the way it

Ended. I've learned there is a gracefull way to

Do things. Rejection hurts

Posted (edited)

[quote=Is best friends with( they were long time friends before they slept

Together) I said I understood and I thought everything was fine.

The thing is we still talk and hang out once and a while. I really

Like her and I don't know how to tell her and she gives me mixed

Signals. She says she ended it too early but doesn't know if she

Would date me again. I'm heartbroken but trying to stay strong.

I feel like we could have something great. I'm just being patient

But it's been 3 months since we were intimately close. Not just

Sex. I'm 33 and I have options to date other people but I can

Only think about her.

 

 

Thanks, she just turned 25. I've been through

Some rough times and when I really care

About someone I have a hard time letting go

. I also been single for 5 years from a 7 year

Relationship and she's the first girl I've thought

I could be with. The older I get it seems

To be harder to find someone. Ive learned to

Be on my own so I know I will be alright.

I've been in true love before and I think it's

Few and far between so I hold on to it.

She has a lot of friends and is caring so

I think that's why she wants to keep being

Friends. I'm just going to try and be mature

I don't want to say never talk to me again

I think I'll tell her that I still have feelings for her

Then she'll use her discretion and not tell me

About new dates. Although she tells me she is not

Dating. I feel better getting this off my chest.

By the way. I really loved the girl I was in the

7 year relationship with. It crushed me the way it

Ended. I've learned there is a gracefull way to

Do things. Rejection hurts

 

 

Ok, I just wanted to point out a few things that stood out to me in your text and would like to add my two cents

 

 

I think that there is too much holding on in your text, I think you should gather some more experience with women, to get to understand them better and how they function thus avoiding getting friend zoned. In your position I would try to focus on other women and I mean quantity not quality necessarily and after you get your confidence back try to focus on that what really matters to you. I believe that you can do it.

 

An just wanted to add, she hangs around you bc she sees potential but you somehow fail each time to show her that you are the man.

 

Cheers.

Edited by immitable
  • Author
Posted

Thanks, I've never been in the friend zone before.

The thing that was hard too is after she ended it she always talked about how much she loved sex with me and how attractive I was. I am attractive people tell me that all the time but we would always end up talking about sex. I asked her if she wants to date me again or have sex then she apologized for complicating things. I don't know whats going on in her head. She makes it complicated. It's easy for me. If I like someone I think it's worth a shot. I'll never figure women out. Lol

  • Like 1
Posted

Welcome to the club amigo. I just broke up with what I believe to be the love of my life last week. Who knows though, time has a way of changing feelings and clearing your head. She broke up because of school/stress. Even though we both know that we are a perfect match. She just has issues... and issues mixed with emotional gut decisions.... well that's a bad combo. It's simple for me, I'll never figure woman out either.

  • Author
Posted

Ya, she said she wanted to be emotionally as stable as she can be. I told her I understood. I also learned some things from the relationship. So in a way I'm gratefull. I'm learning timing does play a role too. I'm not angry with her or anything. I want what's best for her. Shes a good person and I think most people are generally good. Life can be tough. We just do the best we can. We are still friends and I think she knows if she is dating someone I'll be a little hurt and shes not the type to rub it in my face. I know I'm ready for a relationship so I just want to be totally available to the person I'm with. I'll have to wait until my feelings for her subside. I'm trying to keep my hope to find someone special:)

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