Why do we miss and crave the attention of those who want nothing to do with us?

[ls32ssibm]

It's a very sad state of affairs.

 

I made mistakes, but I at least deserved some closure from my ex. Not a phone call of a photo of her and a new guy on Facebook two weeks later.

 

 

Months later, she doesn't return any of my texts or anything, and has erased me completely from her life.

 

...but why do I (and in a sense, we,) constantly miss those who "don't deserve us"? The past few days she has been on my mind non-stop.

[Fitz]

Validation of self worth.

[Cypress25]

If someone was important to you, you want to feel like you were equally important to them. Naturally, it hurts when you care deeply about someone and they act like they never cared at all.

[Dragonsden]

My situation is very similiar to yours and I feel every bit as bad as you do if not worse about all of this. Not sure how this helps you.

 

I am hoping when I meet the right person all this will seem silly.

[jennisfora]

perhaps it is because there was a time where they loved you deeply, least in my case, and it is hard to fathom where those feelings go, or if they were real? but they seemed very real. maybe it is hard to accept that they can move on, while we struggle?

[Tiera D]

she already gave u closure indirectly, "She and the new guy picture"..Anyway she did the correct thing i think,its hard being the big man,i told my ex i had a new girl,she cursed me,belittled me,scolded at me saying im a betrayer..it hurts my heart,i just dont want to string her along

 

Just get a new girl at this point its over mate.sorry

TD

[daisy088]

Im so sorry. Im right there with ya... probably one of the worst feelings in the world.

 

Funny thing is- I briefly had a romantic relationship with a man a little younger than me (I never agreed to be officially his girlfriend and he was totally a rebound from my first boyfriend of 3 years) right before I dated my ex who just dumped me. I was never that into the rebound-guy and always considered him a good friend. I unfortunately dealt with it pretty horribly and cut him off without giving him much warning/began dating my current ex who i dated and lived with for more than a year.

 

I truly believe this is karma coming back to bite me in the ass. I know I dealt rebound-guy such heartache (he saw me with my current ex a few weeks after I finally cut all contact with him... although I had told him for several months I did not intend to date him and I did have the same feelings for him). Is this crazy of me to think that the universe is trying to teach me a lesson?

 

Regardless- this is one of the worst feelings that I have experienced in my life. I agree with a poster above. I have noticed that once someone rejects me, after Ive been vulnerable and given them my heart, I become obsessed and devastated to an unnatural degree (I believe). I believe my self-esteem is quite low and that if I liked myself and was independent enough, Id be, and you'd be better apt to deal with a break up. Just my POV... hugs, dear. I know it will get better for all of us.

[ToyWithMe812]

Because we loved them, or at least those of us that did truly love them. If you lost a loved one and found out they were still here, you would do anything to try and rekindle contact with them.

 

Plain and simple, that is the case. It is impossible to fathom how someone we loved so much, and thought that they love us as well, that they would ever hurt us in such a way. But they have become different people, different beings. They must become dead to us...they have not left this earth, but they have left our lives, forever...