serial muse Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 Anything said or done is open to interpretation it is the responsibility of the person giving the message to give a precise one not one that can be misinterpreted joystick, I usually like your common-sense threads, but I cannot get behind (har har) this statement here. To me, that sort of extremist thinking is part of a continuum that leads to nonsense like the Gateway Sexual Activity Bill: Controversial abstinence bill passed by Tennessee House - Action News 5 - Memphis, Tennessee Do we really want to "police" behaviors like hugging, in that way?
fortyninethousand322 Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 joystick, I usually like your common-sense threads, but I cannot get behind (har har) this statement here. To me, that sort of extremist thinking is part of a continuum that leads to nonsense like the Gateway Sexual Activity Bill: Controversial abstinence bill passed by Tennessee House - Action News 5 - Memphis, Tennessee Do we really want to "police" behaviors like hugging, in that way? Well it wouldn't impact my life in any way.
Imported Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 A girl (we work together and were on the road) goes in like she is going to kiss my lips, but only hovers near m lips for a while. Is that innocent flirting? I'm laying in a bed at a hotel (logical and innocent explanation, but that's another story) and the girl lays down besides me and stares me down suggestively in what I interpreted as a sexual manner. Is that innocent flirting? Somehow a conversation is started on how to improve the taste of semen by eating pineapples and strawberries. Next day at breakfast the girl gets me a plate of fresh fruits at the buffet and its all pineapples and strawberries. I called her on it saying I have a girlfriend and was told it was just innocent flirting.
jobaba Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 Personally I'm hoping I don't have to learn the game. I kind of want a woman to take the reigns of responsibility from me and force the issue. Of course, even if that happened, I think I'd have a Groucho Marx moment. You know "I'd never want to be part of a club that would have me as a member" sort of thing. Like what kind of screwed up person would want to date me? You don't have to play the game. None of my girlfriends flirted with me before we hooked up. You have to remember where you are. This is a DATING FORUM.
somedude81 Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 You don't have to play the game. None of my girlfriends flirted with me before we hooked up. Really? How did things get started with them?
fishtaco Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 A girl (we work together and were on the road) goes in like she is going to kiss my lips, but only hovers near m lips for a while. Is that innocent flirting? I'm laying in a bed at a hotel (logical and innocent explanation, but that's another story) and the girl lays down besides me and stares me down suggestively in what I interpreted as a sexual manner. Is that innocent flirting? Somehow a conversation is started on how to improve the taste of semen by eating pineapples and strawberries. Next day at breakfast the girl gets me a plate of fresh fruits at the buffet and its all pineapples and strawberries. I called her on it saying I have a girlfriend and was told it was just innocent flirting. Fishtaco +1 Squirt some ranch dressing on a plate and give it back to her. Tell her it's a test, and you'll be watching closely. Oh wait, you have a girlfriend, nevermind. 1
serial muse Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 Well it wouldn't impact my life in any way. Was going to "like" this but then worried I would be sending the wrong message to you.
jobaba Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 Really? How did things get started with them? One I met through a mutual friend and we were hanging out and drinking and just started making out. Another I asked out on a 'date' after having gotten signs that she would like to more friends if anything and we made out. Another I played in a band with and we hung around and had about two very platonic one on one meetings and then the third time got plastered and made out. This is just my total opinion ... but flirting is retarded. I'd much rather feel attraction to someone I connected to and felt was intelligent and just generally enjoyed casually talking to than a woman hiking up her skirt, batting her eyebrows and speaking in a high pitched voice.
Mme. Chaucer Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 Quote: Originally Posted by joystickd Anything said or done is open to interpretation it is the responsibility of the person giving the message to give a precise one not one that can be misinterpreted joystick, I usually like your common-sense threads, but I cannot get behind (har har) this statement here. To me, that sort of extremist thinking is part of a continuum that leads to nonsense like the Gateway Sexual Activity Bill: Controversial abstinence bill passed by Tennessee House - Action News 5 - Memphis, Tennessee Do we really want to "police" behaviors like hugging, in that way? I totally agree with Ms. Muse, including the part about usually being alligned with what joystickd posts. I completely disagree with this statement. I believe that we need to be true to ourselves, and behave that way. If somebody misinterprets us, I don't think we need to change ourselves to suit their way of understanding. I do, however, believe that we need to accept the way we're perceived and possibly learn from it.
Oxy Moronovich Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 Yes. In many Asiatic countries, men and women hold hands. It's also my understanding that Eastern Europeans aren't so touch averse. Ever wonder if touch sterility has to do with the prudish nature of a Christian influenced culture? Time and again on LS, I read about how women are responsible for male interpretation of action. Are all men little boys that are incapable of being responsible for themselves? So you are saying Arabic and Asian cultures are less prudish than North America? Wow. 1
Mrlonelyone Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 @Oxy In Muslim cultures men and men and women and women hold hands. So in a sense they are less prudish about same sex shows of public affection. Up to and including kissing and hugging. (if you google you can find an image of the Prez of Iran frenching a man.) In general: I concur with those who have pointed out that once you lay hands on someone it's not innocent. Touch is the strongest way to flirt... it's a move. Surprisingly I agree with Meme Chaucer. Many women invent the idea of an innocent flirtation so they can get the ego boost of getting a man hot under the collar without having to follow through. Ladies, imagine a man who got you...moistened... then refused to do you and left you hanging. That's what an innocent flirt does to a man.
somedude81 Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 One I met through a mutual friend and we were hanging out and drinking and just started making out. Another I asked out on a 'date' after having gotten signs that she would like to more friends if anything and we made out. Another I played in a band with and we hung around and had about two very platonic one on one meetings and then the third time got plastered and made out. This is just my total opinion ... but flirting is retarded. I'd much rather feel attraction to someone I connected to and felt was intelligent and just generally enjoyed casually talking to than a woman hiking up her skirt, batting her eyebrows and speaking in a high pitched voice. So the basic story is, we got drunk and made out?
threebyfate Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 Anything said or done is open to interpretation it is the responsibility of the person giving the message to give a precise one not one that can be misinterpretedSo if I misinterpreted your post, it would be your fault. Let's say a woman with a gun misinterprets an innocent man walking towards her as wanting to attack since he's looking into her eyes and walking directly at her. Using your logic, he shouldn't be walking towards her or looking into her eyes. Had he not done so, she wouldn't have shot him...
jobaba Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 So the basic story is, we got drunk and made out? More or less yes. Don't believe the hype about making a strong connection with a woman or learning Flirting 101 and all of its moves and rebuttals back and forth like it's a game of Grandmaster Chess. There was at least a decent connection with one of those women before we made out, but no more than other women who have rejected me. Numbers, numbers, numbers. I don't even need to tell you how many times I was rejected in between those three.
phineas Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 So if I misinterpreted your post, it would be your fault. Let's say a woman with a gun misinterprets an innocent man walking towards her as wanting to attack since he's looking into her eyes and walking directly at her. Using your logic, he shouldn't be walking towards her or looking into her eyes. Had he not done so, she wouldn't have shot him... Except, you seem to have a habit of misinterpreting other peoples posts & one has to wonder if you do it on purpose or just have a whole lot of issues. Still trying to figure out how you got "rapey" out of sumdudes post.
Oxy Moronovich Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 @Oxy In Muslim cultures men and men and women and women hold hands. So in a sense they are less prudish about same sex shows of public affection. Up to and including kissing and hugging. (if you google you can find an image of the Prez of Iran frenching a man.) So open homosexuality is a sign they are less prudish? Again I say wow.
threebyfate Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 Except, you seem to have a habit of misinterpreting other peoples posts & one has to wonder if you do it on purpose or just have a whole lot of issues. Still trying to figure out how you got "rapey" out of sumdudes post.It's pretty obvious that somedude's belief is that men are victims of women so if women don't take care of them, reading their minds, whatever will happen will happen. Uh, women should know that men want sex. It's not a matter of being responsible for ourselves. Whatever happened to girls being told that boys only want one thing? Don't blame the lion when you put your head in it's mouth. Requoting somedude's original post, including the bolding of significant phrases.
Oxy Moronovich Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 Apparently, somedude, who openly admits he is unable to get a woman's phone number, is a guy who understands women now. Wow...
threebyfate Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 Missed these posts from being offline for awhile. Everything beyond that is sets off alarms for me.Not everyone's like you. Haven't you figured this out yet? So you are saying Arabic and Asian cultures are less prudish than North America? Wow. When it comes to touching between friends, absolutely.
fortyninethousand322 Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 Apparently, somedude, who openly admits he is unable to get a woman's phone number, is a guy who understands women now. Wow... Well those who can't...pontificate on LS. Isn't that the old saying?
phineas Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 It's pretty obvious that somedude's belief is that men are victims of women so if women don't take care of them, reading their minds, whatever will happen will happen. Requoting somedude's original post, including the bolding of significant phrases. You can bold, italicize, color it read & change the font. It's still F'd up that you somehow got "rapey" out of what he posted. But thanks so much for re-quoting it. You just affirmed that I disagree with you. You have problem with don't you? People disagreeing with. You should probably see a therapist about that.
phineas Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 Apparently, somedude, who openly admits he is unable to get a woman's phone number, is a guy who understands women now. Wow... Dude! you disagree'd with her. She is SO going to quote & bold your post. LULZ! 1
Oxy Moronovich Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 Missed these posts from being offline for awhile. Not everyone's like you. Haven't you figured this out yet? When it comes to touching between friends, absolutely. Are we talking about touching between opposite genders? That's what I've been asking. Are seriously telling me in Arabic countries there is a lot of flirting like the OP is describing? That's preposterous. Well those who can't...pontificate on LS. Isn't that the old saying? I guess. It's convenient how posters like threebyfate, who know somedude is crappy with women, will use his posts as a way to further her agenda. Dude! you disagree'd with her. She is SO going to quote & bold your post. LULZ! Yeah, what is the point of all that bolding stuff she does?
threebyfate Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 Are we talking about touching between opposite genders? That's what I've been asking. Are seriously telling me in Arabic countries there is a lot of flirting like the OP is describing? That's preposterous.This is out of context to how the discussion evolved. Go back and read the posts.
joystickd Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 joystick, I usually like your common-sense threads, but I cannot get behind (har har) this statement here. To me, that sort of extremist thinking is part of a continuum that leads to nonsense like the Gateway Sexual Activity Bill: Controversial abstinence bill passed by Tennessee House - Action News 5 - Memphis, Tennessee Do we really want to "police" behaviors like hugging, in that way? I didn't mean that. I was saying that as a person you have to take it upon yourself to be clear about your intent. I'm not for policing but I'm all for someone really establishing and respecting boundaries.
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