hammet125 Posted April 29, 2012 Posted April 29, 2012 Everyone reading this may be thinking that its not that big of a deal and Im a big baby. I know this is probably true, but heres my story. I was seeing this girl on and off for the last 7 months. She fell in love with me first however I didnt until later because I was getting over my ex. Once I got over her I fell head over heels for this girl, and gave her every part of me that I had besides the clothes I was wearing. She started to become distant about 3 months ago, while we were still somewhat together not exclusivly however under agreement to not do anything with anyone else. However I knew something was up, I find out 3 months later that she had been mentally cheating on me with her best friend. Tough as it was we finally established that she didnt want me two weeks ago. Unfortunately this girl lives right across the pathway from me and we have the same class schedule (in college) so we see each other quite often. I was fine seeing her up until now her man piece is visiting and I had to walk behind them to class one day and see them off and on together. At first I held my head up high knowing that the guy she was seeing was ugly as can be (which he was) and that it was her loss because she gave away the one guy that would give her everything she could have possible dreamed of. However its slowly been sinking in of them two together and she made them two her facebook profile picture, and now its killing me inside. My head comes up with all sorts of sick images of what they do in the bed that I use to lay in and its driving me nuts. Im the type of person that when I care about someone I go all in. And now she's happily moved on and Im the one hurting. Im making small strides and was fine until I saw those two together. Now with finals coming up its hard for me to study and focus and even motivate myself to move with all these things going through my head and heart. I know I sound pathetic but if someone could give me some advice on what to say to myself anytime I have a thought of them two. Or just anything at all please help cant afford to be depressed like this for very much longer.
darkmoon Posted April 29, 2012 Posted April 29, 2012 as it's your finals, i see emergency so try an anti-depressant, not prozac or seroxat both have sde effects, but citalipram is ok look all this up on-line, it's your finals, they take a couple of weeks to kick in btw
foolish optimist Posted April 29, 2012 Posted April 29, 2012 I advise against anti-depressants, my girlfriend is currently on them and its ruining my relationship with her, I think they cause more problems than they solve. The only advice I can offer you is to try to tough it out, i've been there before man, many many times, and I know its hard and it sucks and its painful, I can empathize 100%. However, let this be a lesson to you for the future "Don't **** where you eat." I've made that mistake many many times as well and it always made things worse. A good rule of thumb is "If the likelihood of you seeing this person after you break up is high, then don't see them in the first place." Also, the "Im the one guy that could giver her everything she could possibly have dreamed of" attitude is likely the problem (which I am also experiencing with my gf atm). Early on in a relationship (if you're not measuring it in years yet I consider it early) you have to straddle a fine line with a girl. Even if she is already in love with you, feelings still take time to develop and mature. Giving her everything she wants and treating her like a queen, etc. is a fast way to drive her away from you. She will feel suffocated from it, and lose interest because there is no more challenge or excitement or mystery left. I am sure some will disagree, but I think its a very real phenomenon, and I have experienced it personally in the past on my end as well (a girlfriend who tried way to hard to please me all the time, etc. and I just lost interest in her)
DontWorryBHappy Posted April 30, 2012 Posted April 30, 2012 Hey man, I'm a college aged female, and I totally sympathize with you. After my ex broke up with me a year ago, I was an absolute wreck. I was like you... I gave him every last bit of me, and didn't want it to end. He lived across the street and I passed his building every day. At night was the worst because I would come back home on the bus, and before the breakup I would just waltz on over to his building, and he'd be expecting me. It's awful... actually I can't finish typing this reply because I feel myself getting emotional. You're not alone.
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