xxSRMxx Posted April 29, 2012 Posted April 29, 2012 When I came to loveshack with my break up people told me to keep busy. I thought what? Keep busy? How the hell am i meant to do that?? I tried to do it but i would burst into tears at work randomly and felt really weak. I pretty much ignored what everyone told me to do and sat in my bedroom for two and a half weeks crying, going over memories, regrets, texting him, getting pissed and turning up at his like a psycho and basically losing all my dignity! I was meant to go back to college this week and i didnt, i just lay in bed feeling sorry for myself. In a way, Im glad I had the period of crying into a wine bottle and behaving hysterically, but lets face it, its done me no good. This week I returned back to work, I actually had BAD anziety when it came to first going. I went hot, breathless, my heart was racing and I couldnt think right. I thought what the hell has happened to you! I pulled my car over and sobbed my heart out and called my best friend, she told me to get it together and go in. I sat and thought right girl, U need to go! I drove it, I was miserable for the first hour and then someone made me laugh... I work in a busy restaurant in town, Have lots of good friends there and when that person made me laugh I thought omg Ive just laughed. Ive been at work all weekend and have laughed so much!! Ive purposely worked alot of hours and it has done me the world of good, people even said to me ''god ive missed you'' and give me a massive hug, it made me feel warm inside. These people have been my friends before I even met my boyfriend, i had a life before, and i still will have a life. Granted tonight, I cried on the way home in the car, alone, with my thoughts, but thats bound to happen. I guess what im trying to say is, Wallow in your own self pity, put an adele album on and cry, but dont do it for too long...and dont get drunk! I couldve saved myself alot of further hurt and embarassment if only id returned sooner. Next weeks challenge, back to college, after this weekend, i can do it Stay strong all xx 3
january2011 Posted April 29, 2012 Posted April 29, 2012 When I came to loveshack with my break up people told me to keep busy. I thought what? Keep busy? How the hell am i meant to do that?? I tried to do it but i would burst into tears at work randomly and felt really weak. I pretty much ignored what everyone told me to do Glad to hear that you're feeling better overall, even though you had a little cry earlier. When the break-up is still very fresh, the feelings can be so overwhelming. It's hard to think clearly when all you feel like doing is curling up in bed to cry and hide from the world. Most people aren't ready to hear some of the advice, but they usually remember it when they are ready and the fog lifts a bit. 1
Wibbly Posted April 29, 2012 Posted April 29, 2012 Sounds like you're going through the motions and you're well on your way to getting over everything! Way to go! One thing I disagree with, though, is putting on Adele. If I hear one more Adele song come on the radio I'm going to go crazy! You've gone through some tough times with the break-up, but it sounds like the worst is over. Keep your chin up!
Author xxSRMxx Posted April 29, 2012 Author Posted April 29, 2012 Adele drives me crazy too! lol but she does appeal to the brokenhearted...any sad song/album, put it on and cry! Its a long journey, a girl came upto me at work tonight and was like... ''oh i heard about you and your bf, im really sorry, ive been through it, it gets easier, just takes time'' and this is true, most people have been there too! AND moved on! Sometimes though horrible thoughts of him with other females will pop into my head and ill feel sad, but then I just kept telling myself, it is his loss, once ive worked on myself and become happy in my own skin, Ill be fine, We will all be fine, eventually. Oh and NC WORKS! I continuously broke NC and it pushed me further into turmoil, This is the longest Ive gone NC and the best ive felt.
Wibbly Posted April 29, 2012 Posted April 29, 2012 I'm pretty much in the same boat right now. Almost exactly a month since my high school girlfriend and I broke up after a 10-year relationship. At first it was devastating, but I can see a lot of positives too. Like you said, we get to work on ourselves and focus all of our energy on making ourselves happy. I occasionally start thinking about the whole thing, but then shrug it off and think of all of the good things that have come out of it. I'd only cry during an Adele song if I can't reach the tuner to change the station! My girlfriend seems to break NC more than me. Occasionally I have to, to check to see if there's any mail at my old apartment, but for the most part I try not to talk to her. I don't find contact at this point makes it any more difficult, although things could change once one of us finds someone new. But, glad to hear you're feeling better!
beyond Posted April 29, 2012 Posted April 29, 2012 Good for you girl. It's hard not to wallow and a certain bit of it is ok - helps you learn things about yourself and the break up, but not if it gets in the way of you living your life. I read something on here the other day when I was feeling down - it said allow yourself a set amount of time everyday to feel sad/think about break up etc. This works for me. If I find myself starting to think about him in the day, I tell myself to wait until later and then have an hour in the evening when i let myself. You were fine before him and you will be fine again. xx
TaintedHeart Posted April 29, 2012 Posted April 29, 2012 (edited) Good girl! I done exactly what you done with my last break up. Yes you may of been hurting yourself by locking yourself away but at least its all out now and you know that you won't be going back to that place. As you know I've been having a crappy time too and have been keeping busy. Some days I'm like 'Meh' but then I think 'I can either get out and about or fall into that horrible black hole like I did last time'. Pfft, will never allow myslef to hurt myself like that again so up I get! Even if I don't feel like it at first as soon as I'm out and around people I notice how my mood changes. Then you get home and think 'Wow I've hardly thought about him' And then you're too knackerd to even start. Lol. Though when your tired you might get a bit emotional so the best thing to do is have a nice soak then curl up in bed and get some shut eye. No booze lol. Keep at it and keep NC x Edited April 29, 2012 by TaintedHeart
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