will_woman Posted June 21, 2004 Posted June 21, 2004 Hi….i posted before on my husband who found his new gf in a foreign land. I quitted my job and flew over to join him. In less than 2 weeks, he started to show symptoms of his so-called busy work schedule. Then finally, he admitted he met a girl and wanted divorce. I had no choice but to leave that place. That happened in Oct last year. In January , he came back and filed annulment hoping to escape without compensating. I hired a lawyer and then I replied demanding compensation before peaceful settlement. And letters are flying to and fro since January. Today, I got his reply. That axxhole not willing to pay a single cent and still wanted to go ahead with annulment marriage filing. He is making more trouble. That shows that he is not guilty towards me losing job and all these unhappiness. Am I being naive to think that he will actually wake up? I have no idea if they are still together. But based on his reply, I guess they are still together. He continues to be mean towards me. Is he committing more sins than ever? I hope he is, then one fine day, he can pay off in other form. Actually, I felt disturbed once I knew of his reply. Things will drag again. What can I do to stabilize my emotions?
lnichols Posted June 22, 2004 Posted June 22, 2004 You didn't say how long the two of you have been married. In Texas, at least, they have strange alimony laws, like you have to have been married at least 10 years and you have to have either not worked or have put him through school or something. I didn't even try after my first marriage ended. At the time, I was making more money than he was and I think that I may have ended up paying temp. support. I didn't even get temp child support and it took 6 months for the divorce to become final. Maybe the best thing to do is to move on. I know how angry you must feel considering he cheated on you. I have friends that have been through similar situations and the hurt takes a long time to heal.
sportsloving Posted June 22, 2004 Posted June 22, 2004 If he is able to file for annulment, I seriously doubt that you are going to get any compensation. Annulments have many guidelines, and usually the most important is that there hasn't been a lot of time between marriage and annulment (meaning he didn't support you long enough to claim distress or maintenance). You can check with your attorney ... but be realistic about the laws. I understand you are hurt and want to make him hurt in some way, money or otherwise ... but sometimes things just don't work out that way. I would suggest you forget about trying to make him pay, look for a job and try to put the whole experience behind you. In time you will heal and probably be much better off without him in your life
Author will_woman Posted June 22, 2004 Author Posted June 22, 2004 thanks for the advice No worries for me....I found a job in Mar this year...and trying to move on positively. We have been registered in name coming to 3 years. HE is trying to anul to skip the compensation. His ground for anulment is non-consummation. I am trying to demand my job loss during that period of time & also he hold some of our shared assets. Anyway, I should leave the worries to my lawyer right?
Author will_woman Posted April 20, 2005 Author Posted April 20, 2005 Hi....long time since I last posted on the forum... the last time, i mentioned that my husband cheated in china and he has such good time with his new found gf. The worst part is I quitted my job and flew over to join him. In less than 2 weeks, he started to show symptoms of his so-called busy work schedule. Then finally, he admitted he met a girl and wanted divorce. I had no choice but to leave that place. That happened in Oct 2003. Then he started anulment petition in early 2004 and of coz...i contested it. He has no choice but to withdraw it in Oct 2004. My lawyer communicated with his lawyer and asked what does the a**h*** want now. His lawyer claimed that my husband will be back for a short period of time and then he will discusssed on how to proceed with the divorce. Then we waited until end Dec 2004. No sight of him at all. His lawyer even kept quiet when my lawyer wrote to ask him. Okay....that idiotic husband is keeping quiet....Then one fine day, I disocvered that actually he was back in town for a while. He came back to cancel our jointly-owned timeshare membership and replaced it with a new one. The new membership has HIS NAME & HIS GF's Name. Gosh....what a jerk!!!! So, you see....he took a flight back and terminate the membership without my consent and then went back to China. He does not even want to do anything to the divorce because he never communicate with his lawyer. My lawyer wrote to the timeshare club....pursuing on them to reinsiate the old membership as idiotic husband did not get my consent. OKay...seeing that the jerk is not wanting to do anyting about the divorce. I am starting a petition soon. Because of this last act from him, I am totally disappointed in him. He profession is an accounatnt and he just terminate the membership by telling the club that he got my authorisation. He is a man with no INTEGRITY and SHAME........He was the one who cheated on me and he is hiding away from the divorce. Because he can continue to have his fun in China and holding a high expat salary. Some of my friends are saying that I can make a police report and create trouble for him. When my anger is here, I really feel like doing that. I want him to know he has to pay a price. I want to demand compensatio from him for making me jobless for 8 months for I quitted my job to fly over. If anyone is in my situation, will you report to the police? I really feel like snapping him off. He is an accountant by profession......forgery can destroy him.
ConfusedInOC Posted April 20, 2005 Posted April 20, 2005 Originally posted by will_woman thanks for the advice No worries for me....I found a job in Mar this year...and trying to move on positively. We have been registered in name coming to 3 years. HE is trying to anul to skip the compensation. His ground for anulment is non-consummation. I am trying to demand my job loss during that period of time & also he hold some of our shared assets. Anyway, I should leave the worries to my lawyer right? Can you explain why being compensated is so important for an obviously short marriage? (If it can be annuled, it was a short marriage - less than a year).
Author will_woman Posted April 21, 2005 Author Posted April 21, 2005 thanks for replying. He chose anulment as it was the easiest way out for him. We have already registered our marriage for 3 years. It's just we did not hold any ceremony yet. Anyway, the reasonh he used for anulment is non-consummation. And that's obviously a BIG BIG lie!!! Now I am starting a petition based on unreasonable behaviour (how he wanted a divorce based on lies....he sold the membership wihtout me knowing it...all the bits and pieces from him...all those nonsense) I am just thinking whether should i report to police to get him into trouble??
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