Does our relationship seem healthy to become an LDR/LDR advice

[snickerdoodles86]

[font=arial][/font][color=black][/color] OK, this is my first posting on this site but I must say this site is GREAT! I've been trying to find some sort of forum like this for awhile online thanks for being there.

 

Anyways back to my problem, bare with me here because this may be a long one! When I became a freshman in high school I was very scared, I had just moved to a totally different state. I met this wonderful guy who come to find out lived and still lives in my neighborhood (practically like neighbors) well I really liked him to and to make a long story short everything sort of fell into place and we FINALLY ended up dating our Senior year.

 

Well, I just got out of high school and am still dating him we have been dating now for about 6 months and I don't exactly know if it's REAL love or what, it's still a little too early to know I guess but he is the best boyfriend that I have ever had I mean ever he is like the ideal man to me. I know that sounds sooo cheesy sorry!

 

Here comes the trouble, me and him are going to different colleges and it's not that big of a deal because it's only approximately two hours away for now, but due to family situations and in my best financial interest I will be moving to another state in about 6 months.

 

We have both talked it over and as of right now, we still want to see if we can do this long distance relationship thing. We both have decided that we are going to take it day by day and just express ourself if it just ends up not working out.

 

Well, I am really worried. I don't want to hurt him or mess this relationship up. Does anyone have some good advice for this relationship pre-LDR and LDR. I mean should we be planning or setting goals for this relationship or is that too early and .....dumb. See I think that may be the case but then I don't. I have mixed feelings.

 

And last off, does this relationship scream out at you as being unhealthy? Is there something that we need to work on now while we are still together because from reading I know that LDR's are extremely difficult and I don't want any added stress to be in this relationship. I mean it may be hard to tell because you don't necessarily know our relationship but anything look grossly off here?

 

Thanks so much for helping me out.

 

 

 

 

P.S. Sorry for the abbreviated words! LDR is Long Distance Relationship, just wanted to make sure everyone got it, I'm sure ya'll did though!

[YellowLioness]

I would love to tell you to go ahead and throw yourself into a long distance relationship. However, in good conscience, I can't. I recently graduated college, and my advice to you is to let go this relationship, and start college with a clean slate. You're young, you're in college, so just enjoy yourself. And, unless you really want to marry this guy, I'd concentrate on making friends and the dean's list. The angst that comes with long distance relationships usually ends up being for naught, as 75% of them fail. I saw so many of my friends go through the long distance woes freshman year, and now all of my friends (except for one) is with someone she met in college, NOT their highschool sweet heart. But, perhaps I am one to talk, because my long distance relationship worked out, and now we are living together. That usually is not the way the story goes, however. Hope this helps.

 

 

yellow

[Kristina]

Hi and welcome to the site! I guess you could say I am in the same type of situation. My bf and I dated for 1.5 years before he moved 12 hours away to go to school. We are both in college. We have made it 6 months apart and have visited each other twice in that time.

 

I can tell you right now it is extremely hard, but if you are both very dedicated to each other, then it is possible to make it thru. My bf and I are both completely in love with each other and know for sure that we want to get married when we are both finished with college. Being so sure that he is "the one" really helps in a LDR.

 

I'm sure it will be difficult if you are both just starting college, becuz it is such a big difference than high school. As for it being unhealthy, it is not, as long as you have a life where you are too. Keep hanging out with friends and focusing on school. There's nothing worse than wondering what your LD bf is up to at the moment. Communication is also key since thats the only contact you will have with him every day. Good luck!

[snickerdoodles86]

[font=arial][/font][color=black][/color] Thanks so much for your help! I think that I am going to try this LDR but if it's not working, I'm going to leave it. I mean you have to try first right?

 

I always get this feeling like he is "the one" but I don't really want to jump to that conclusion JUST yet, I mean I'm still kinda young and all and things including my bf and I may completly change as we go through college but I do think that this is worth a try at least.

 

Thanks yellowlioness for forwarning me though. I know this will be a difficult feat but as of right now we really are going to try it. We won't know unless we try and this will really help me in the long run figure out if this relationship is special enough for marriage. If so great (cause he is such a gentleman/wonderful guy) but if not well.... ok theres someone out there... I just don't know if I've found that special someone and this LDR just might be a confirmation either yah

 

Thanks to both of you for all of your help!! I GREATLY appreciate it!!!

[YellowLioness]

Any time. I didn't want to rain on your parade, and I'm glad that you are being smart about it. I truely hope that you all make it. Have a blast in college! (Don't forget to bring your toothbrush ---> from someone who's been there )