SJC2008 Posted April 25, 2012 Posted April 25, 2012 Here's the "stats" from my last go around. 1.She answered her phone 2/7 times if my memory serves me correct and my elephant memory usually does. 2.She returned one the 5 unanswered calls with a call and texted back to the rest. 3. One returned text to a call was when I left a vm saying let's get together tomorrow and she said "sounds good" Now none of this actually bothered me until a couple dates in and she had yet to initiate contact. And from what I have read here it is bad etequette to reply to a call with a text. Ladies and gents do yall consider her behavior rude or bad dating etequette?
Author SJC2008 Posted April 25, 2012 Author Posted April 25, 2012 But it seems like women do this a lot so if I make it a deal breaker I may not get past a second date. We're in our early 30's mind you so it's not a "Text gen" thing IMO. Ladies? What do yall think? Do you text back to calls or do you call back?
wow04 Posted April 25, 2012 Posted April 25, 2012 I am in my 30's and I text more than call. It is easier and quicker.
Meg717 Posted April 25, 2012 Posted April 25, 2012 Here's my opinion on the situation.. I am 27 as an FYI... I prefer to text, it's easier and talking on the phone can be time consuming. That being said, if a guy I was getting to know called me and I missed the call, whether there was a voicemail or not, I would call the person back. The only time I would text if I missed a call is if I were busy, like in a movie theater or a loud bar/club, but if that were the case I would also give a warning such as, "Sorry I'm in a bar and it's really loud. What's up?" I might also text if the person said, on the voicemail "Call or text me back." Other than those few reasons, there is no excuse to miss a call and then text the person back, esp if she is interested!
InJest Posted April 25, 2012 Posted April 25, 2012 You should make lack of interest a dealbreaker. If a lot of women do this to you, then it just means a lot of women have a lack of interest in you, and you shouldn't continue to feed their ego. How many dates have you been on with her? Have you slept with her yet, or even come close?
Author SJC2008 Posted April 25, 2012 Author Posted April 25, 2012 It's over between us, we went out 3 times. Due to my lack of dating exp I'm trying to see if texting back to a call is kosher. She always got back to me but by text so mabye that was her style. My point of this thread is should a text response to a call (other than a "busy I'll call you later") be a red flag?
Meg717 Posted April 25, 2012 Posted April 25, 2012 I'd say yes. If she's interested in you and answers with a text to your call then maybe there is something else going on with her that it's probably best to avoid.
serial muse Posted April 25, 2012 Posted April 25, 2012 I'm grumpy about texting and too old for text gen, so I'm biased, but yeah, I think it's a red flag. And as sid3 said, the flag reads "low interest."
persevere Posted April 25, 2012 Posted April 25, 2012 Texting in response to a phone call is ok in certain instances. However, if that's all you get, you're done. Texting in 'called' circumstances, such as a date setup or request, or certain other 'courtesy' situations is flat out rude. It can also lead to suspicion. Recently, I called a date not long after we parted, to make sure she got home ok, around midnite. She texted me at 4am, saying she fell asleep.
Author SJC2008 Posted April 25, 2012 Author Posted April 25, 2012 I don't mind if someone prefers texting over calling, or even responding to a call via text in SOME instances. But if a man calls for a date and leaves a message I think the woman should call back in that situation. I think she was phone shy because the first time I called her I got her VM and she texted the next day that she was sorry she missed my call instead of calling me back.
veggirl Posted April 25, 2012 Posted April 25, 2012 The only time I've experienced people returning a call with a text message is if I call and they are at work or in a meeting or otherwise occupied. I wouldn't be all upset if someone texted in response instead of calling though, I guess if they did it all the time I'd probably be like wtf? but even though I don't like when people are all "I hate talking on the phone, I prefer texting", I do understand that LOTS of people are like that so I guess I roll with it. I don't look at the mode of communication as an indicator of interest, instead I look at a) if they initiate and b) the frequency of communication
sal110104 Posted April 25, 2012 Posted April 25, 2012 I am a woman but I really hate to talk on the phone. Cell phones which most of us have - sometimes drop the call or its hard to understand the person on the other end. I spend 1/2 my time asking them to repeat themselves or just kind of chuckling when I didnt really catch what was said. That being said - if a guy called me - I would return his call. I probably would initiate texting more than calling. But I always respond in one way or another - unless there is no interest -- then I'm trying to find a way to ease out of the situation
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