TheSingleGuy Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 I've been seeing this girl for several months now. She is really perfect. If I were to break up with her, I'd seriously struggle to find another girl as good as her. She really is perfect for me. I am really in love with her. But now that boyfriend season is over, I've got SO MUCH opportunity with lots of other women. None of the these other women would be in her league, but, still, I'm really tempted to dump the perfect girl to be single again and see all these other women. Do women think this way too? Or is this strictly a male way of thinking?
verhrzn Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 Stupidity and bad decisions are not limited to either gender. 1
wwwjd Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 You kidding? Women almost always have an eye on trading up. Otherwise no one would ever break up, or get divorced.
verhrzn Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 You kidding? Women almost always have an eye on trading up. Otherwise no one would ever break up, or get divorced. But women dump or divorce a guy because they think there's something actually wrong with the original guy... they don't look at someone and say "wow he's perfect!" and yet STILL want to ditch him. That seems to be uniquely male, the whole "play the field" thing. 1
Negative Nancy Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 they don't look at someone and say "wow he's perfect!" and yet STILL want to ditch him. That seems to be uniquely male, the whole "play the field" thing. Exactly. Sadly, 99% of men think this way, so it's better not to get involved with any man, they're all gonna cheat anyway.
Woggle Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 But women dump or divorce a guy because they think there's something actually wrong with the original guy... they don't look at someone and say "wow he's perfect!" and yet STILL want to ditch him. That seems to be uniquely male, the whole "play the field" thing. Actually it happens plenty with women. How many times do you hear about women dumping a guy that treats them great because of GIGS. This stuff is not exclusive to men.
jobaba Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 I've been seeing this girl for several months now. She is really perfect. If I were to break up with her, I'd seriously struggle to find another girl as good as her. She really is perfect for me. I am really in love with her. But now that boyfriend season is over, I've got SO MUCH opportunity with lots of other women. None of the these other women would be in her league, but, still, I'm really tempted to dump the perfect girl to be single again and see all these other women. Do women think this way too? Or is this strictly a male way of thinking? I think everybody at one point in a relationship thinks to themselves they can get something closer to what they want, whether it be looks, compatibility, or character. And the truth is EVERYBODY can find somebody closer to and better for them in this world. Think about of how big a world this is. That's why they call it marriage and love. Because you've committed to that person even though something better in some aspect might come along. In your situation, at least have the courtesy to break up with her before you go chasing. If you do that, then it's OK. Whether you find someone better or not, it was your decision. Looking around while you are still dating her is messed up though. 1
verhrzn Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 Actually it happens plenty with women. How many times do you hear about women dumping a guy that treats them great because of GIGS. This stuff is not exclusive to men. Treating them great is not the same as being perfectly attracted to them. That's a trap guys seem to end up in, which is why you see so so so many awkward men complaining about how they were "so nice" to this girl and yet she still won't sleep with him. His behavior towards her matters but it is not the be-all, end-all. The female equivalent of this is a woman who says she is amazingly attracted to her bf, he makes great money, he is nice to her, they have a great time together, and she'll never have it as good as she does with him, but she still wants to dump him. And I have NEVER heard a woman say this.
Woggle Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 Treating them great is not the same as being perfectly attracted to them. That's a trap guys seem to end up in, which is why you see so so so many awkward men complaining about how they were "so nice" to this girl and yet she still won't sleep with him. His behavior towards her matters but it is not the be-all, end-all. The female equivalent of this is a woman who says she is amazingly attracted to her bf, he makes great money, he is nice to her, they have a great time together, and she'll never have it as good as she does with him, but she still wants to dump him. And I have NEVER heard a woman say this. It happens all the time. Look at all these women who say they can't find anything wrong with their husbands but still want a divorce. I am not trying to say all women are like this but stop acting like it is just men that do this. Men get blamed for a lot that in reality both genders are guilty of.
soserious1 Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 It's called "Spring" we used to huddle in caves all paired up like to pair up for the winter but then, spring comes & with it the nomadic urge to move on & possibly get out there & procreate with a new female to hopefully increase your chances of having offspring that live to adulthood. If you are happy in your relationship, just acknowledge these thoughts for what they are echo's from our distant past & turn your attentions back to your girlfriend.
SmileFace Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 Guy or girl... It's pretty ****ed up. How is this escalating to a gender war ? Ugh
Negative Nancy Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 (edited) procreate with a new female to hopefully increase your chances of having offspring that live to adulthood yes, that makes alot of sense. fcking one female for one or two months straight increases the chances of offspring way more than fcking 10 different females that might or might not even have their fertile days. aside from the fact that "spreading the seed" is pretty much useless even if you manage to impregnate 10 different females, because how exactly is your offspring supposed to survive if the male isn't around to take care of them and protect them because he is busy screwing a "new round of females" again? this whole evolutionary psychology is just a bunch of garbage and it doesn't become any more true simply by repeating it over and over again. Edited April 24, 2012 by Negative Nancy
musemaj11 Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 (edited) Men are attracted to quantity while women are attracted to quality. Men will jump to someone 'newer' while women will jump to someone 'better'. Edited April 24, 2012 by musemaj11 1
Author TheSingleGuy Posted April 24, 2012 Author Posted April 24, 2012 ++++this whole evolutionary psychology is just a bunch of garbage++++ Well said.
musemaj11 Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 ++++this whole evolutionary psychology is just a bunch of garbage++++ Well said. Science is garbage for those who know little about it.
soserious1 Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 yes, that makes alot of sense. fcking one female for one or two months straight increases the chances of offspring way more than fcking 10 different females that might or might not even have their fertile days. aside from the fact that "spreading the seed" is pretty much useless even if you manage to impregnate 10 different females, because how exactly is your offspring supposed to survive if the male isn't around to take care of them and protect them because he is busy screwing a "new round of females" again? this whole evolutionary psychology is just a bunch of garbage and it doesn't become any more true simply by repeating it over and over again. You are totally missing my point, I didn't say that the urge was a good thing or that he should act on it. I just said that it was a biological echo .. And actually back in the caves, men & women tended to pair bond for about 4 yrs, long enough to complete a pregnancy & have a young child who was capable of walking/running before the pair split up & moved onto repeat the cycle with new partners. We weren't monogamous for life, not by a long shot. Oh & spreading your seed far & wide ensured genetic diversity.. a good thing in a world where your species is rather numbered. 1
Negative Nancy Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 And actually back in the caves, men & women tended to pair bond for about 4 yrs, long enough to complete a pregnancy & have a young child who was capable of walking/running before the pair split up & moved onto repeat the cycle with new partners. We weren't monogamous for life, not by a long shot. Were you around back then and personally witnessed it?
soserious1 Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 Were you around back then and personally witnessed it? I'm older than dirt but not quite that old There has been a fair amount of research done on the subject though.
Woggle Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 Hopefully we have evolved beyond caveman days. They also clubbed each other over the head and wore nothing but leaves but I don't see too many people promoting that. 1
LZ2000 Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 I am a man and I say that if I found the absolute perfect girl for me, I'd never dump her at all. I would consider myself to be truly blessed. But of course, if she wants to dump me, I can only do so much to stop it.
Author TheSingleGuy Posted April 24, 2012 Author Posted April 24, 2012 Soserious1, It sounds like you've been reading a bunch of black propaganda. About a year after my divorce, I read Sperm Wars and believed every word of it. As it turns out, scientists were COMPLETELY unable to replicate a sperm war in the laboratory. The entire book was horse ****. If you enjoy reading, I STRONGLY recommend Sexual Sabotage. Excellent read and very eye opening. 2
persevere Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 You must factor in the jealousy aspect. How many of these other women would be interested in you if you were single again? It seems women are usually interested more whenever a man is not on the market. 1
KathyM Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 If a person is in love with someone and thinks they are so perfect, they sure as heck are not going to dump that person to go chasing after others. Most people know when they have a good thing going and don't want to lose it. Only those that have deep-seated issues and don't believe they deserve someone good would break up under those circumstances. 1
Negative Nancy Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 Hopefully we have evolved beyond caveman days. They also clubbed each other over the head and wore nothing but leaves but I don't see too many people promoting that. exactly. it's funny how people always use the "it's biology, I can't help it"-excuse, but watch how all those "it's nature"-ramblings would go out the window if you asked them to go without such unnatural things like tvs, cars, computers, phones etc.
Woggle Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 If they really want to be all natural they should start riding horses and living without electricity.
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