mesmerized Posted April 23, 2012 Posted April 23, 2012 If you look older that could be it. My issue is the opposite, more younger men hit on me than older men.
yongyong Posted April 23, 2012 Posted April 23, 2012 what kind of clothes do you wear, what kind of make up, what kind of music, what's your interests? do you talk about Shakespeare or into some astrology? how's your 'vibe' compared to other kids?
Author Teshe Posted April 24, 2012 Author Posted April 24, 2012 Daddy issues much. Easy to manipulate. Fetish? And as for no1 interested in you around your age, as long as you got a pair of boobs, men will hit on you (unless you're obese), but you probably either ignore them or consider them creeps. Pick your choice. More like tyrant father and daughter who likes to obey. No I'm not obese... I'm sure I don't though I'm open to any one (not in a desperate way though)
Author Teshe Posted April 24, 2012 Author Posted April 24, 2012 can depend on your physical facial structure, body and general presentation. I was talking to a gal at a sub shop once, sure she was 23+ or so... she was 17. 17!! She looked way older, and had an experienced personality. so, post a link to your photo and measurements and let me decide. yes, I'm totally kidding on that last part I was raised differently. To act different than most kids etc.I can fit in with teenagers if need be but also those past 50.
Author Teshe Posted April 24, 2012 Author Posted April 24, 2012 You are 20 years old? Why aren't you allowed to date? Because they (parents) said so. I don't know why though.and here(home) you don't ask why. I can list a while bunch of outrageous things I've had to go through.
Author Teshe Posted April 24, 2012 Author Posted April 24, 2012 I don't know, Teshe, now you have me all confused. How much have you spoken with this guy? Have you two ever had extended conversations or are they just flirty exchanges? I suggest crawling before you walk and that translates into friendly banter and light conversation with a few laughs. Be receptive and upbeat when you see him. Ask him how his day is going. Compliment the color of his shirt. Ask him about his weekend. Smile! He comes in every night for 15 min because he's on his way to work. We cover ask of that stuff and then some.its come to the point where we can automatically tell when the other I'd upset..even I'd were hidding it
Author Teshe Posted April 24, 2012 Author Posted April 24, 2012 have you ever gotten to know anyone in that older age group? you never know. it's not always about trophys or conquering. when communication works great, I enjoy dating 10 and more years younger. and older. age is just a numbering system. Not in a romantic way.I would have never imagined I'd feel so strongly about someone so much and who I barely knew.
wwwjd Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 Not in a romantic way.I would have never imagined I'd feel so strongly about someone so much and who I barely knew. Sounds like you have a decent connection. If you don't want to just get used, just leave romance and sex out of it until you are absolutely certain of exclusiveness. Or marriage. Most importantly, just be yourself. Not someone trying to seem older. He was attracted to YOU, not you pretending to be older to match up. The BEST part in my experience dating younger is cross learning various interests: she got me up to date in music and dance lessons, I got her into smooth jazz, fine dining and motorcycling. It was win-win. I loved her adventurous spirit (actually matched mine) and she adored my respect and courtesy. Listen to your heart, spirit and mind. Not the NUMBERS of age.
FitChick Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 How do you think your parents would react to your dating someone nearly their age? It sounds to me like you have never had male attention and this is an exciting experience for you. Is he married? Does he have kids? I'd say continue being respectful and maybe he'd fix you up with his son. 1
Author Teshe Posted April 24, 2012 Author Posted April 24, 2012 Sounds like you have a decent connection. If you don't want to just get used, just leave romance and sex out of it until you are absolutely certain of exclusiveness. Or marriage. Most importantly, just be yourself. Not someone trying to seem older. He was attracted to YOU, not you pretending to be older to match up. The BEST part in my experience dating younger is cross learning various interests: she got me up to date in music and dance lessons, I got her into smooth jazz, fine dining and motorcycling. It was win-win. I loved her adventurous spirit (actually matched mine) and she adored my respect and courtesy. Listen to your heart, spirit and mind. Not the NUMBERS of age. Of course to all of it. I want to stay as virgin till marriage, I want to marry a friend, preferably a best friend and not some stranger, and I'm never gonna change for singer one to like me. always gonna be myself. Yeah I'm working on knowing his interests. So far it seems we have a lot in common. Us our a negative he's been married twice though? He said his past wives couldn't handle all of the hours he works. He also has 3 kids. 18,14, and,7. I also noticed I seem to be the only one asking the questions. He stares.which I don't mind because I love his eyes, but does this mean I'm more into him them he is me?
Author Teshe Posted April 24, 2012 Author Posted April 24, 2012 How do you think your parents would react to your dating someone nearly their age? It sounds to me like you have never had male attention and this is an exciting experience for you. Is he married? Does he have kids? I'd say continue being respectful and maybe he'd fix you up with his son. I'm not allowed to date..parents rules... But they'd probably be furious. No its not the first, just the first time in a long time that the feelings were mutual. His oldest is 18 but it wouldn't work because of things he's told me about hon.
wwwjd Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 Personally, ...and I know you are not asking.... I'd stay away from this situation in a romantic context. Something seems really bad to me. First, married twice is not a good sign at all. 2nd, let's pretend 3 years from now you got married.... NOW you are an instant MOM to a 10 year old? I'm not a woman, but that would be messy, I would think. And if it doesn't work out and you got sexual, then you were used and discarded for fun. If you are new at dating, this nice person doesn't seem like a great place to start. A LOT of baggage for a new dater to put up with. 2 ex wives and the painful names they will call you, children, someone else's full family life schedule. You basically miss out on the fun a carefree dating life CAN be. (not sexually, just enjoying the LACK of baggage to deal with when you are young)
Author Teshe Posted April 24, 2012 Author Posted April 24, 2012 can depend on your physical facial structure, body and general presentation. I was talking to a gal at a sub shop once, sure she was 23+ or so... she was 17. 17!! She looked way older, and had an experienced personality. so, post a link to your photo and measurements and let me decide. yes, I'm totally kidding on that last part I know you were joking.but I don't mind...your just not getting measurements not the best photo but its what I have right now
Author Teshe Posted April 24, 2012 Author Posted April 24, 2012 Personally, ...and I know you are not asking.... I'd stay away from this situation in a romantic context. Something seems really bad to me. First, married twice is not a good sign at all. 2nd, let's pretend 3 years from now you got married.... NOW you are an instant MOM to a 10 year old? I'm not a woman, but that would be messy, I would think. And if it doesn't work out and you got sexual, then you were used and discarded for fun. If you are new at dating, this nice person doesn't seem like a great place to start. A LOT of baggage for a new dater to put up with. 2 ex wives and the painful names they will call you, children, someone else's full family life schedule. You basically miss out on the fun a carefree dating life CAN be. (not sexually, just enjoying the LACK of baggage to deal with when you are young) Yeah I know. And yet I still can't (more like choose not to)help it.none of them are in his life though....not his choice
FitChick Posted April 24, 2012 Posted April 24, 2012 Are you sure he was married or were these just his baby mamas? Do you want to be another baby mama on welfare? That's where I feel you are headed due to your lack of experience.
Author Teshe Posted April 24, 2012 Author Posted April 24, 2012 Are you sure he was married or were these just his baby mamas? Do you want to be another baby mama on welfare? That's where I feel you are headed due to your lack of experience. I assure you because of my personal values there will be no possible way for me to become pregnant.. And yes I asked married..and He confirmed with the same word.
kaylan Posted April 25, 2012 Posted April 25, 2012 Because young men are immature and just want to fool around, and older men love younger women. It's this whole innocence/power dynamic thing. Don't worry, though, you're not alone. This board is filled with women who are ignored by men who are seemingly in their same demographic (same age, same income, etc.) Me myself, I can't even get an older, overweight, underemployed pot addict to want me, so... I feel your pain.Older men want to fool around to. Lets be real here. Just as many, if not more, older men would use a younger chick for sex just as a younger men would. 1
angie2443 Posted April 25, 2012 Posted April 25, 2012 You are a beautiful young person. You do look your age. Please, don't waste your youth on a 40 year old man. If you were a sexually experimentive person, it might be different. He would just be something to experience before you moved on to the next guy. I get the sense that you aren't like that, though. There is so much to learn at your age. There is so much to do. Take a few years to grow. A 40 year old man is at a very different point in his life than a 20 year old. Maybe it was just this one picture, but you looked a bit down or insecure. Older men pick up on that and know how to use it. They aren't always more mature or caring, they just know how to fake it better. More experiences equals better acting. It could be that you have controlling parents (or dad) and you haven't had as many chances to gain experience as someone with less controlling parents. Give yourself time to grow before hooking up with a middle aged man. In a few years, you'll have a better fix on not just what you want out of life, but on what others want and you'll be able to work a relationship better. Take care:) 1
123321 Posted April 25, 2012 Posted April 25, 2012 I always wanted to corrupt my very own Amish babe. 1
Author Teshe Posted April 25, 2012 Author Posted April 25, 2012 You are a beautiful young person. You do look your age. Please, don't waste your youth on a 40 year old man. If you were a sexually experimentive person, it might be different. He would just be something to experience before you moved on to the next guy. I get the sense that you aren't like that, though. There is so much to learn at your age. There is so much to do. Take a few years to grow. A 40 year old man is at a very different point in his life than a 20 year old. Maybe it was just this one picture, but you looked a bit down or insecure. Older men pick up on that and know how to use it. They aren't always more mature or caring, they just know how to fake it better. More experiences equals better acting. It could be that you have controlling parents (or dad) and you haven't had as many chances to gain experience as someone with less controlling parents. Give yourself time to grow before hooking up with a middle aged man. In a few years, you'll have a better fix on not just what you want out of life, but on what others want and you'll be able to work a relationship better. Take care:) Even though I haven't said it that's exactly why I'm still iffy about the whole scenario
mesmerized Posted April 25, 2012 Posted April 25, 2012 There are certain ethnicities/races that older men feel like they have a better chance with. Asians and perhaps african americans are some of them. I remember my japanese friend told me how a lot of older men hit on her because she is too shy and innocent looking, older perverts see these girls as their targets. They're rather afraid to hit on white women for example because they can be pretty intolerant. I don't get hit on by older men often, perhaps because I look like I can get pretty bitchy lol My advice to you is to be confident, show it in your actions and how you carry yourself and let them know soon where they stand. Still be polite though unless they break the boundaries. And no, don't go for a 40 year old with two failed marriages and kids, that's just the worst decision someone your age can make. If you REALLY think this will go anywhere good for you, think again.
goldengirl11 Posted April 25, 2012 Posted April 25, 2012 (edited) There are certain ethnicities/races that older men feel like they have a better chance with. Asians and perhaps african americans are some of them. I remember my japanese friend told me how a lot of older men hit on her because she is too shy and innocent looking, older perverts see these girls as their targets. They're rather afraid to hit on white women for example because they can be pretty intolerant. I don't get hit on by older men often, perhaps because I look like I can get pretty bitchy lol My advice to you is to be confident, show it in your actions and how you carry yourself and let them know soon where they stand. Still be polite though unless they break the boundaries. And no, don't go for a 40 year old with two failed marriages and kids, that's just the worst decision someone your age can make. If you REALLY think this will go anywhere good for you, think again. On the other hand, at least he's had some life experience I suppose. He could be 40 (or older), never married etc and still living with Mum, like someone I know. Edited April 25, 2012 by goldengirl11
snovamp Posted April 25, 2012 Posted April 25, 2012 I just walked in the door here to find this post which is ironic.. I'm 54 and dating a 25 yr old.. I think it all depends on the mindset of the ones involved. I have friends who squawk at my choice of men as I only date younger, and always have only dated younger.. It's my choice.. Just as it is his choice and he as well only dates women 50 +..
Author Teshe Posted April 25, 2012 Author Posted April 25, 2012 Thanks for the insight bromance considering my predicament what would YOU suggest?
snovamp Posted April 25, 2012 Posted April 25, 2012 Ouch.. Where have you been reading.. ?? I hate to dispel the rumor mill but women in their 50's ( at least all of the ones I know ) have a sex drive that tires the average male.. I'll never tire of the statement "You want it AGAIN??? " lol Hell ya.. 2
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