xztjohn Posted April 23, 2012 Posted April 23, 2012 Broke up 7 months ago, I chose not to jump into another relationship and just take time for myself and really focus on school work and social life. From it my grades got alot better, my social life got better, Im starting to work out consistently at the gym so feel healthier, started to be more goal oriented towards my career. My ex chose to jump into another relationship right after, there was alot of drama for 3 or 4 months cause she wasn't over me and was really confused playing both me and her new boyfriend (cheating and manipulating). She wanted me back at one period and I wanted her back as well but I refused and now they are official. As far as boyfriend goes I think he does alot of right things showers her with cash, he seems really obsessed with her and one point I saw that he posted "You are such a sweet girl, you treat me so nice, yet I don't feel like I am that close with you, but thats why i love you" it was deleted soon after. This was like 3 or 4 weeks ago from the 7 month break up. I think that sums up their whole relationship. I know i shouldn't matter but I don't think he is that good of a guy, from what I hear he drinks coffee and alcohol all day, does exctasy alot, not the healthiest guy out there. However I am quite the opposite, where I go to the gym alot, try to eat healthy for the most part. Just so you guys get an idea of this guy he has alot of acne and went for her at a time when she was really vulnerable (they are roommates). I am a guy with really good skin and built, I know for sure that he is a downgrade from me in alot of aspects, but he is a better boyfriend. As for my love life, me and this girl are getting close, but it hasn't reached to the next level yet. It has been really hard to recover from this, I do feel lonely at times, I feel bitter at times and a part of me miss that companionship. Sorry for the rant, but writing stuff like this soothes me when I am a bit down. I hope the path I have chosen was the right thing and the much more respected one.
xpaperxcutx Posted April 23, 2012 Posted April 23, 2012 After a breakup you can only think about you. It doesn't make you selfish, it makes you human. There is nothing wrong with making the decisions you did, and I see you do seem to have a good head on your shoulders. Keep at it.
jphcbpa Posted April 23, 2012 Posted April 23, 2012 good for you for taking time out for yourself and not swinging to that next vine. this is very mature and will serve you well.
Author xztjohn Posted April 23, 2012 Author Posted April 23, 2012 thanks I appreciate that. When I realized it was really over, I chose to go no contact and ignored her bread crumb messages. However I do feel like sending her a message because its been so long, asking her how she is doing or I hope we can be civil with one another one day.
Author xztjohn Posted April 23, 2012 Author Posted April 23, 2012 (edited) I guess I feel like messaging her so bad is because I just saw a message he posted on her wall about how much he loves her :/ and talks about him going to see her parents. Edited April 23, 2012 by xztjohn
immitable Posted April 23, 2012 Posted April 23, 2012 I guess I feel like messaging her so bad is because I just saw a message he posted on her wall about how much he loves her :/ and talks about him going to see her parents. fb is for attention whores and he is one for sure. Don't let that set you back. Her romance is going to wear off at some point and that is when you'll have a chance to text her.
Philosoraptor Posted April 23, 2012 Posted April 23, 2012 I guess I feel like messaging her so bad is because I just saw a message he posted on her wall about how much he loves her :/ and talks about him going to see her parents. Then stop looking. You are hurting yourself. When a breakup happens we need to accept that your ex will eventually be happier with someone else and that someone else is going to share everything you had, and more, with your ex.
Author xztjohn Posted April 23, 2012 Author Posted April 23, 2012 yeah I know i shouldn't but its so hard not to check up on your ex. Fb makes it harder to move on
Philosoraptor Posted April 23, 2012 Posted April 23, 2012 yeah I know i shouldn't but its so hard not to check up on your ex. Fb makes it harder to move on You're blaming facebook when it is you who continues to make the choice to look. Work on self control and inner focus rather than focusing on her.
geegirl Posted April 23, 2012 Posted April 23, 2012 yeah I know i shouldn't but its so hard not to check up on your ex. Fb makes it harder to move on You are the only one that makes it hard. If you want your life to change then you will have to make different choices for yourself, number one being, choosing not to check FB because you WANT to move on. It always comes down to a choice. Placing the blame on a social website is the best way to enable yourself.
Philosoraptor Posted April 23, 2012 Posted April 23, 2012 yeah you guys are right Then delete your facebook so you can't just get the urge to look. This way in order to look in the future you'd have to create a new one... and that will hopefully give you enough time to process what you are doing and make the smart decision.
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