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Posted

some among u may remember me,ive been here asked questions..well to keep u guyz updated..Its good news.I did not get back together with my ex but..Today im in a relationship with a new girl..at the mean time the sad chapter about me and my ex has ended.I have not completely forgotten her but i believe soon i will :) .I think i had to contact my ex one last time to talk to her and give her closure we promised that when we are together,i think i need support on this. not that i still love her but its going to be a hammer on her even though shes the dumper.

 

Any suggestion how to give her closure without sounding mean,im worried she would suddenly beg me or guilt trip me or something..any ideas

 

meanwhile il still be here helping anyone in need as a payment for the great support u all gave me.Thanks

 

TD

Posted

Why do you need to message her? She's gone, you owe her nothing. All you'll be doing by contacting her is opening old wounds.

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Posted

well she still claims she loves me these pass months,and have did nothing wrong we brokeup due to circumstances,but its all the past now,i just think im obligated to tell her its over and give her closure and not giving her any hopes.I a man that is the type that is "what i have promised i must fulfill"

Posted
well she still claims she loves me these pass months,and have did nothing wrong we brokeup due to circumstances,but its all the past now,i just think im obligated to tell her its over and give her closure and not giving her any hopes.I a man that is the type that is "what i have promised i must fulfill"

Yes but by doing so you are going to open wounds that need not be opened. What if she has done a lot of healing and hearing from you just tears her in two?

 

You don't find closure from someone else, you find it from within. You can't give her something that she needs to find within herself.

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Posted

well me and my ex still kept close contact until yesterday..she still claims she loves me and shows signs jealousy.im just worried that i dont tell her it will be like i stringing her along giving her hope so its best be harsh but swift?

Posted
well me and my ex still kept close contact until yesterday..she still claims she loves me and shows signs jealousy.im just worried that i dont tell her it will be like i stringing her along giving her hope so its best be harsh but swift?

So you're still in constant contact? Hrm, that makes it quite difficult.

 

In this case I would inform her that you have no plans of reconciliation and that for now, continued contact will only bring pain.

 

At that point you need to go NC, at the very least for her. If she still has hope then any contact with you will bring her loads of pain and reestablish hope where there is none.

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