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Would you go back to him in these circumstances?


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  • Author
Posted
I'm a guy and i wouldn't take back a girl who did this to me.

 

Hope it helps ... taking her back would mean to me that i was demeaning myself after she messed up (went for grass is greener).

 

Thanks for a male perspective.;)

  • Author
Posted (edited)

One last thing is that after the other girl came on the scene he was keen to keep me on a string by text (until it was official or the time he disappeared) and often asking for any more pics, yet actually sealing another date didn't happen. Went on a date with someone else though last night who I'd met on-line which went ok. Didn't really feel any sparks fly though. :(

Edited by goldengirl11
  • 2 weeks later...
  • Author
Posted

Just to say that although I've not heard from him of late, I've decided that if he gets in touch again at some point, that I'm going take it with a pinch of salt and not get my hopes up. In fact, I'm not even sure why I would want to reply to him at all! Unless he expressed how much he missed me of course.;) Besides, I have a date on Wed with a guy who I've been talking to for more than a few weeks which will hopefully go well.:bunny:

Posted
Besides, I have a date on Wed with a guy who I've been talking to for more than a few weeks which will hopefully go well.:bunny:

Good luck on that date.

 

And forget about this guy.

  • Like 1
  • Author
Posted
Good luck on that date.

 

And forget about this guy.

 

Thanks, d'Arthez.:)

Posted

Yes, but only if he wore a huge sign in the middle of 5'oclock traffic with the written words of, 'I was a total douchebag to Goldengirl, and hope she gives me another chance.' Anything less, than the answer would be, No:)

  • Like 3
  • Author
Posted
Yes, but only if he wore a huge sign in the middle of 5'oclock traffic with the written words of, 'I was a total douchebag to Goldengirl, and hope she gives me another chance.' Anything less, than the answer would be, No:)

 

Yes, quite.;) Thanks Brit!

  • Author
Posted (edited)

To Brit... It still hurts me time to time how things turned out after he vanished on me, but I know things weren't the same between us when there were 3 of us, then 2 (excluding me). I recall him being a complete and utter tease when it wasn't just us anymore e.g "What are you going to try on me then?" and "you should try this and that on your own first" which didn't happen between us. I know if it had of been just us still though he would've seen me as no doubt he would've wanted a shag. I do blame myself tho, if I am honest, that we didn't see each other for a month whilst I was moving (when our schedules mainly clashed, hence when he moved on to another). Mind you, he didn't offer to help! :rolleyes: I am moving on tho, honest.;)

Edited by goldengirl11
Posted (edited)

When I met my current bf, I had just been broken up with. When the ex came back, I decided to give him another chance. I chose him over my current bf. He ended up leaving me again and my bf was thrilled that we could give a relationship a shot. He hadn't been forward with his interest and placed some of the blame on himself for not making a move. I felt like a jerk who didn't deserve a chance. But, we've been dating 3 months now. Oh yeah, and the ex tried to come back again!

 

I think the difference here is that I had not been intimate with my bf yet, no kissing, cuddling, nothing. We were friends and I knew he was interested, but there was no dating or talking about feelings. I don't get intimate unless I am sure I want to be with the person. So when I went back to the ex, I hadn't crossed an intimacy line yet. Intimacy = exclusivity in my book. Actions and opinions on this is different for everyone though. So if a guy was physically intimate with me and then left me for someone else, I'd never take him back.

Edited by ScienceGal
  • Like 1
  • 2 weeks later...
  • Author
Posted
When I met my current bf, I had just been broken up with. When the ex came back, I decided to give him another chance. I chose him over my current bf. He ended up leaving me again and my bf was thrilled that we could give a relationship a shot. He hadn't been forward with his interest and placed some of the blame on himself for not making a move. I felt like a jerk who didn't deserve a chance. But, we've been dating 3 months now. Oh yeah, and the ex tried to come back again!

 

Sorry who were you referring to when you said that he hadn't been forward with his interest and placed some of the blame on himself for not making a move? :o

 

I can appreciate that intimacy = exclusivity with you. Same here! I guess that because I was potty about him though, that I regrettably didn't make that clear incase I lost him. :rolleyes:

  • Author
Posted (edited)
NO!! don't do it. Making excuses of schedule won't erase that fact he chose someone else over you. if he was really into you he wouldn't of done this after sleeping with you.

 

if he is back around.. it's just because he is lonely / bored and you are a good fill-in till someone better comes along.

 

Keep your pride and don't go there.

 

Hey, not trying to make excuses for him, but we were intimate on two occasions e.g BJ and attempting penetration the last time (sorry to be blunt), which made me feel insecure when he left i.e that he might try it on with someone else partly out of frustration (after penetration was difficult that time). It then appeared he'd started seeing someone else two weeks later before we had met up (and didn't) again, despite him texting/e-mailing me (eventually randomly) for a while afterwards. There also seemed to be quite often gaps in-between when we met up too. :(:o

Edited by goldengirl11
  • Author
Posted (edited)

I just wanted to add I suppose that I'm sick of getting my heart broken and where the last guy is concerned he probably thinks he's got me wrapped round his little finger i.e that he can contact me when he wants and I'll go running. I'm actually disgusted how he's cut me off and feel a fool again (my fault I know) after over two months NC for both of us, I sent him a one-liner in the week asking if he was having a good Jubilee weekend and that reckon had eaten far too much. Wasn't that surprised not to hear from him though. I just hope that if and when he does contact me that I will be happy with someone else and reject HIM for a change. I won't forget what appeared to be strong sexual chemistry though and think it's a shame that we didn't actually have sex, but I guess when he was getting it elsewhere I became only an option. Lastly, I v much regret not meeting up twice after he offered since that last meeting, which was basically because I was embarassed to invite him over at the time because I was right in the middle of moving, so instead of suggesting a pub like I should've done, I aimed to invite him round a few weeks later in my new flat (including double bed) which didn't happen, despite him saying that he would like to see my lovely new flat etc. I know that I can only put this s****y experience down to experience though. Rant over! :o

Edited by goldengirl11
Posted

WHY?!?! You could pick up a drunken sailor on a street corner and get treated better than this loser does to you.

  • Author
Posted
WHY?!?! You could pick up a drunken sailor on a street corner and get treated better than this loser does to you.

 

Hey, thanks. Tried to edit my last post actually as shouldn't have said 1 or 2 things. I guess it's just dealing with rejection at the end of the day isn't it? Thanks again.

  • Author
Posted

ScienceGal - Sorry ignore my last question to you. Was too late to edit post and was quite obvious you were referring to your ex. :o

Posted
ScienceGal - Sorry ignore my last question to you. Was too late to edit post and was quite obvious you were referring to your ex. :o

 

My current boyfriend was not forward with telling me how he felt. So, we were still just friends (only knew each other a month or so) when my ex came back. I decided to give the ex another chance. When he left me again, my current bf contacted me and was very direct in showing he was intersted in being more than friends. Had I been intimate with him and then went back to the ex... I'm not so sure how that would've went. But, that's not something I would ever do since I would only have sex with someone that I wanted a LTR with. No bed hopping for me :)

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