xztjohn Posted April 22, 2012 Posted April 22, 2012 before spring break she cAlled me twice on both days and sent me a text saying can you help me with bio hw? i dont want to fail. i just ignored it like i have these 4 months. its been a month now since she contacted me. we broke up for 7 months and she would always contact me constantly, i think after that incident she has realized it was fallin on deaf ears. i was thinking about responding to her next time sje contacted me, but i guess that wont happen at all. :/
Author xztjohn Posted April 22, 2012 Author Posted April 22, 2012 i kinda want to shoot her a email or text saying "i hope we can be civil with each other one day." have been ignoring her hard for 4 months now
smudge21 Posted April 22, 2012 Posted April 22, 2012 So now she's gone quiet on you and in return you want to make the effort. See the pattern? If you break NC now what good will the last few months have done as all you'll be doing is re-opening that door and taking things back to where they were. The fact you're so tempted to contact her and thinking about her so much indicates you're not ready for a basic friendship, so stay NC. Eventually you will get better and move on, meet other people, maybe even another relationship. Right now though, I can't really see any good coming from contacting her. 1
Author xztjohn Posted April 22, 2012 Author Posted April 22, 2012 yeah ur totally right, its like a back and forth thing with us, i hate it. shes my first girlfried and i haven found anyone else yet thats prob why its been kinda hard for me to fully move on
smudge21 Posted April 22, 2012 Posted April 22, 2012 Doesn't matter if it's a first love or a tenth, those feelings still hurt just as bad when something ends. I know. Just stay strong and try to move on with your life now. Always remember, if a dumper wanted a dumpee back, they would do anything and everything to make it so, and nothing would stand in their way. Until that happens, everything else can be ignored.
Author xztjohn Posted April 23, 2012 Author Posted April 23, 2012 thanks for the advice. sucks tho just dont like how she left me for someone else like that and have all this fun. i kinda want to talk to her, know wat she thinks, if she think how she handled it was cruel.
smudge21 Posted April 23, 2012 Posted April 23, 2012 Doesn't matter what she'd say to you, you'd still feel like crap. Accept the facts and move on, that's really all you can do. Second guessing and wandering about stuff isn't gonna' help you in anyway. Her life is her own and she chose a path - time for you to chose one of you own too.
Frank13 Posted April 23, 2012 Posted April 23, 2012 (edited) So now she's gone quiet on you and in return you want to make the effort. See the pattern? If you break NC now what good will the last few months have done as all you'll be doing is re-opening that door and taking things back to where they were. The fact you're so tempted to contact her and thinking about her so much indicates you're not ready for a basic friendship, so stay NC. Eventually you will get better and move on, meet other people, maybe even another relationship. Right now though, I can't really see any good coming from contacting her. I am in complete agreement with Smudge. Always remember, if a dumper wanted a dumpee back, they would do anything and everything to make it so, and nothing would stand in their way. Until that happens, everything else can be ignored. This is the number one rule of NC. All she threw you was breadcrumbs. I just posted earlier on another threat how I am beginning to think that ego is so closely involved with love. One person wants the other until the other comes back then they don't. So the person who came back leaves and then the first person wants them back again and the second person doesn't want to come back. It's like all we are looking for is an ego stroke. Also, we are miserable without a person but if we find they miss us, we feel better. Either ego and love are tied together or we confuse our ego for love. Edited April 23, 2012 by Frank13 1
jphcbpa Posted April 23, 2012 Posted April 23, 2012 you have to be okay with you. someone else is not going to make you happy. enjoy this time alone...find out who you are, meet the real you, what you want, what you like.
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