gotye Posted April 21, 2012 Posted April 21, 2012 my friend and I talked about how I have a specific thing I want in a guy (tall and thin preferably wearing glasses) yet he can find many different types dateabley attractive
USMCHokie Posted April 21, 2012 Posted April 21, 2012 my friend and I talked about how I have a specific thing I want in a guy (tall and thin preferably wearing glasses) yet he can find many different types dateabley attractive The only thing this tells me is that you are more specific about attraction than he is... 1
Author gotye Posted April 21, 2012 Author Posted April 21, 2012 The only thing this tells me is that you are more specific about attraction than he is... well, we talked more on how most girls have specific types while guys have more of a range of what they want. but yes, I am more specific than he and a lot of people
aj22one Posted April 21, 2012 Posted April 21, 2012 Hokie is right. I'm a guy and I'd say I'm very specific about what I'm attracted to.
Author gotye Posted April 21, 2012 Author Posted April 21, 2012 Hokie is right. I'm a guy and I'd say I'm very specific about what I'm attracted to. well, that's good to know too. I went out with this guy who said he thinks most girls are hott, and although that isn't bad it is nice when you are dating a guy and find out that something specifically about you is attractive to him.
aj22one Posted April 21, 2012 Posted April 21, 2012 well, that's good to know too. I went out with this guy who said he thinks most girls are hott, and although that isn't bad it is nice when you are dating a guy and find out that something specifically about you is attractive to him. Well age might have something to do with that too. Younger guys might be more open minded than older ones. But that probably goes for most women too.
gaius Posted April 21, 2012 Posted April 21, 2012 I think a normal guy will sleep with the closest to his type woman he can get but yeah, we usually have a type. Your guy friend is probably trying to hint that he would sleep with you by not disqualifying whatever type you are.
Author gotye Posted April 21, 2012 Author Posted April 21, 2012 Well age might have something to do with that too. Younger guys might be more open minded than older ones. But that probably goes for most women too. I am actually pretty young, but I have dated so many guys who were nice but not my type that I just don''t wanna do it anymore... I learned what I liked through past romps and now don't want to settle... I think it's easier to be specific when you're young too.
aj22one Posted April 21, 2012 Posted April 21, 2012 I am actually pretty young, but I have dated so many guys who were nice but not my type that I just don''t wanna do it anymore... I learned what I liked through past romps and now don't want to settle... I think it's easier to be specific when you're young too. Well "young" is a relative term here. I'd say somewhere around 25 or so people start to (or do already) figure out exactly what they're looking for. Not just in terms of what they find attractive but other stuff too.
Author gotye Posted April 21, 2012 Author Posted April 21, 2012 Well "young" is a relative term here. I'd say somewhere around 25 or so people start to (or do already) figure out exactly what they're looking for. Not just in terms of what they find attractive but other stuff too. I kind of had a specific type since I was like 10. It is kind of weird.
aj22one Posted April 21, 2012 Posted April 21, 2012 I kind of had a specific type since I was like 10. It is kind of weird. Haha, well me too. It took me a while to accept it though, for a long time I felt kinda bad about it. Like it was something to be ashamed of.
Author gotye Posted April 21, 2012 Author Posted April 21, 2012 Haha, well me too. It took me a while to accept it though, for a long time I felt kinda bad about it. Like it was something to be ashamed of. ya, my friends are always making fun of how picky I am like I should date a guy who is attractive and nice despite him not being the type I want to date.
aj22one Posted April 21, 2012 Posted April 21, 2012 ya, my friends are always making fun of how picky I am like I should date a guy who is attractive and nice despite him not being the type I want to date. If you're adamant about it then stick to your guns no matter what your friends say. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
ThaWholigan Posted April 21, 2012 Posted April 21, 2012 I think liking a specific type is typically an individual thing rather than gender based. I think that it's likely to be close to equal, at least near enough that it shouldn't matter in the grand scheme of things. I have specific things I like but can still be found on a broad scale, whereas others (male+female) are less discriminating about what they are into, perhaps out of lack of awareness of their own wants and needs. There are also others of both genders who are typically very discriminating about their "type" that they wish to attract, but even they can sometimes suffer from a lack of true self awareness of what they want, hidden beneath a list of things they externally deem to be indicative of what is attractive to them.
somedude81 Posted April 21, 2012 Posted April 21, 2012 women are pickier becuase they can be. Exactly. There is a specific type of women that I really like but I don't even bother with them anymore since I have no chance of getting them.
jobaba Posted April 21, 2012 Posted April 21, 2012 Well "young" is a relative term here. I'd say somewhere around 25 or so people start to (or do already) figure out exactly what they're looking for. Not just in terms of what they find attractive but other stuff too. The older I get (and I'm WAY older than 25), the more I expand what 'type' I'll date physically. I've found that restricting yourself to a physical type (in my case, similar physically to me) really restricted me meeting some good women. Of course, my thought process is never in the majority...
udolipixie Posted April 21, 2012 Posted April 21, 2012 my friend and I talked about how I have a specific thing I want in a guy (tall and thin preferably wearing glasses) yet he can find many different types dateabley attractive I think women are more specific in attraction as studies have shown that men agree on what's hot while women don't aka generally women have different types while men have the same types. It suggests women have a wider range of attraction than men.
iris219 Posted April 21, 2012 Posted April 21, 2012 The older I get (and I'm WAY older than 25), the more I expand what 'type' I'll date physically. I've found that restricting yourself to a physical type (in my case, similar physically to me) really restricted me meeting some good women. Of course, my thought process is never in the majority... I'm curious: How do you expand what you find attractive? The OPs idea of attractiveness seems pretty general actually, except for the glasses part, but she said that's just a preference. (Calling all hipsters!)
jobaba Posted April 21, 2012 Posted April 21, 2012 (edited) I'm curious: How do you expand what you find attractive? The OPs idea of attractiveness seems pretty general actually, except for the glasses part, but she said that's just a preference. (Calling all hipsters!) You're only attracted to what you are attracted to because of social construct and your background. Are you attracted to little people/dwarves (like in the TV show)? Probably not. But if you were born that, you likely would be. In a similar vein, if you were born blind, you wouldn't have any sense of facial attraction at all. People saying "I'm attracted to what I'm attracted to and I can't help it." is the same as saying "I can't quit smoking." or "I just can't get mathematics." It's not that you can't, you just don't want to. Believe me, if having sex with hot, 6' tall white men gave you lung cancer, you'd change your sense of attraction ... and fast. As for my own situation, I'm attracted to every type of woman physically, but in my 20s, I concentrated on Asian women because I felt we'd have a better compatibility and I'd have a better shot. In retrospect, I probably passed on a lot of good women. But it's never really been a problem for me, because I've never cared much about looks as far back as I can remember. Probably mostly due to the way I was raised. Edited April 21, 2012 by jobaba
EasyHeart Posted April 21, 2012 Posted April 21, 2012 I've never had a specific physical type and if you lined up all the girlfriends I've had in my life, I doubt you could find much that they have in common (besides being female, of course!) But most other guys I talk to have some specific things they like, so I don't think it's necessarily a gender thing. 1
aj22one Posted April 22, 2012 Posted April 22, 2012 You're only attracted to what you are attracted to because of social construct and your background. Are you attracted to little people/dwarves (like in the TV show)? Probably not. But if you were born that, you likely would be. In a similar vein, if you were born blind, you wouldn't have any sense of facial attraction at all. People saying "I'm attracted to what I'm attracted to and I can't help it." is the same as saying "I can't quit smoking." or "I just can't get mathematics." It's not that you can't, you just don't want to. Believe me, if having sex with hot, 6' tall white men gave you lung cancer, you'd change your sense of attraction ... and fast. As for my own situation, I'm attracted to every type of woman physically, but in my 20s, I concentrated on Asian women because I felt we'd have a better compatibility and I'd have a better shot. In retrospect, I probably passed on a lot of good women. But it's never really been a problem for me, because I've never cared much about looks as far back as I can remember. Probably mostly due to the way I was raised. Well for me it's Indian and Middle Eastern women. And it really is something I can't help, and I'm a white guy so it's not like I grew up in India or somethin. It goes back as far as I can remember. My favorite disney movie as a kid was Aladdin because I got to see Jasmine in a nice outfit. I tried doing the "normal" thing, but it just didn't take. Sometimes it truly is "uncontrollable". 1
ThaWholigan Posted April 22, 2012 Posted April 22, 2012 Well for me it's Indian and Middle Eastern women. And it really is something I can't help, and I'm a white guy so it's not like I grew up in India or somethin. It goes back as far as I can remember. My favorite disney movie as a kid was Aladdin because I got to see Jasmine in a nice outfit. I tried doing the "normal" thing, but it just didn't take. Sometimes it truly is "uncontrollable". Do you like Amerindian girls too?? I met one, she was stunning I've always liked mixed raced/latina girls with curly hair, ever since I was quite young. My mother sometimes would tell me off a little and say I should be attracted to black girls - but she is light-skinned herself . I am attracted to black girls anyway though, as well as Persians and Indians. I like quite a lot of white girls these days too, I saw a show a couple of days ago called 2 Broke Girls, the main character I thought was quite hot.
jobaba Posted April 22, 2012 Posted April 22, 2012 Well for me it's Indian and Middle Eastern women. And it really is something I can't help, and I'm a white guy so it's not like I grew up in India or somethin. It goes back as far as I can remember. My favorite disney movie as a kid was Aladdin because I got to see Jasmine in a nice outfit. I tried doing the "normal" thing, but it just didn't take. Sometimes it truly is "uncontrollable". Well. That explains where it came from. I'm not saying that people should change what they are attracted to. It's just sometimes when I hear people say, "I know what I'm attracted to when I meet someone for 5 seconds and I just can't help it." It's malarkey. If you were an unattractive man and were only attracted to stunning voluptuous types and weren't rich or have something else, you'd have to change your sense of attraction and fast. So, it's not ingrained. People only think it's ingrained because many can get exactly what they're attracted to. But like I said before, it's not an issue for me. Looks have not been important for me as far back as I can remember.
Author gotye Posted April 22, 2012 Author Posted April 22, 2012 I'm curious: How do you expand what you find attractive? The OPs idea of attractiveness seems pretty general actually, except for the glasses part, but she said that's just a preference. (Calling all hipsters!) nerdy computer scientist hipsters plz, no musicians
cl3 Posted April 22, 2012 Posted April 22, 2012 well, that's good to know too. I went out with this guy who said he thinks most girls are hott, and although that isn't bad it is nice when you are dating a guy and find out that something specifically about you is attractive to him. Really? If I dated a guy who thinks most girls are hot, it would feel weird!! Because then it doesn't mean much that he finds me attractive (at least physically!) I get what you are saying though. From my experience, girls do seem to be more specific about their attraction.. Some of my girlfriends even have specific "types", what the guy would wear, look like, etc.. I myself am specific about my attraction!!
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