LasVegasGuy Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 There's all types of advice life and online that you can get for getting over a ex. Some say build a new life, new places, new friends, "something that doesn't remind you if a ex". Most of all advice is centered around moving into the future, in which where the love between you and your Ex does not exist. Now the common rule is to of course stay away from yout favorite movies that you and that person shared, places and music. But I find that going back in history..FAR BACK before you ever met your ex works. Watch movies that remind you of when you didn't need your ex to feel complete, and music that maybe you shared with a ex that you are over, or atlest music when you were not interested in finding a soul mate. The Past : Allows you to feel and think the way before your ex came into your life. Before you lovef them, and no love means no hurt.
USMCHokie Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 But I find that going back in history..FAR BACK before you ever met your ex works. Watch movies that remind you of when you didn't need your ex to feel complete, and music that maybe you shared with a ex that you are over, or atlest music when you were not interested in finding a soul mate. The Past : Allows you to feel and think the way before your ex came into your life. Before you lovef them, and no love means no hurt. I absolutely disagree with this. Each relationship is an experience that is part of our continuum of life. We learn and grow from each one, and each one is vital to who we become. By purposely regressing to a point before that relationship, we lose all we had gained. Lament over your loss (for a little while), cherish what you had, and take what you learned from that relationship and move forward knowing that it's all part of the journey. No one person is going to make you complete. 1
Author LasVegasGuy Posted April 19, 2012 Author Posted April 19, 2012 Exactly, and that's what the past shows you, that at once you did NOT need that person to make you complete. There was a time that.you were happy, content, without them.
Author LasVegasGuy Posted April 19, 2012 Author Posted April 19, 2012 I absolutely disagree with this. Each relationship is an experience that is part of our continuum of life. We learn and grow from each one, and each one is vital to who we become. By purposely regressing to a point before that relationship, we lose all we had gained. Lament over your loss (for a little while), cherish what you had, and take what you learned from that relationship and move forward knowing that it's all part of the journey. No one person is going to make you complete. Im just saying what has worked for me, sure take the experiences with you. Hey, like you said we all are different.
gibson Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 (edited) If an EX wants a second chance... It's not YOUR JOB to get them to want you. It's THEIR JOB to get you to want them. You can't beg, plead, trick, convince, negotiate, threaten, manipulate, etc. someone to want to be with you. Knowing both of these important universal truths, the only method that works is... Doing nothing (which is still doing something) Edited April 19, 2012 by gibson 1
GaelicSoul Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 If an EX wants a second chance... It's not YOUR JOB to get them to want you. It's THEIR JOB to get you to want them. You can't beg, plead, trick, convince, negotiate, threaten, manipulate, etc. someone to want to be with you. Knowing both of these important universal truths, the only method that works is... Doing nothing (which is still doing something) I agree. Your best tactic is to stop contacting them, move on and improve yourself in all departments, let go of any bitterness and anger towards them. That is the important part. If she/he comes back in the future, and your emotions have settled down, then you can make a decision, being in a sound emotional state if you want them again. For now as i have said, move on. It's all you can do.
january2011 Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 I agree with both Hokie and the OP's viewpoints. I think it's great to move forward with a new life, new friends and new hobbies to help you get over an ex. But I also think that it's worth using your past as a springboard to those things. There will often be clues from your past that can help you to plan your future. Though it can be exhilarating to do something that you'd normally never do, everyone needs a starting point and the pre-relationship period is just as good a point as any, in my opinion. A wise man once told me, "it's okay to look back, just don't stare." 1
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