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Posted

Breaking up from my wife and 5 kids very amicably but we cannot decide living or childcare arrangements. We currently share large house but things need to change. My new partner, who gets on well with my wife, had been spending time at the house, but has decided, quite rightly, that she no longer wants to come round until the children know what is going on. How and when do we tell them as we do not know ourselves what the best plan is. Should we involve them in decision making? ages 6 9 12 15 17. My partner is happy to live with my children but not with my wife in same house. My wife is happy for me to live in the house with my partner or in another house with my partner. I ideally want to live in the current family house with my partner. My partner works full time as do I, my wife only part time. Ideas please

Posted

It all comes down to who will have primary physical custody of the children. The children will stay in the family house and the "primary parent" will stay there with them.

Posted
we cant even decide that

 

If you can't decide, then you must let the court decide. Since your wife/ex seems to be understanding of the situation (living with your new gf? waw..), try to reach an agreement with her regarding the children. If you can't, then you must go to court, no other way.

Posted
we cant even decide that

 

I would not give the children the power of decision (except for maybe the 17-year old).

 

If you want the family home and the responsibility of raising your children, then you should ask your Ex to move out. Man-up and show your children that you and your decision should be respected.

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Posted

i have done but she says she doesnt know what she would do

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