Imajerk17 Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Dated someone briefly this winter. We both sort of fell out of contact. I've been thinking of her, and I want to get back in contact. Call or text?
Patrice Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I would call her .. texting is pretty impersonal. 1
mtber75 Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Dated someone briefly this winter. We both sort of fell out of contact. I've been thinking of her, and I want to get back in contact. Call or text? Call first because it been a while. That's more personable!
dasein Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Send me her number, I will call her on your behalf. "Hey, we haven't met. I'm a random dude from a dating board... imajerk wants to know whether he should call, text or fold?" 4
Author Imajerk17 Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 Texting is kind of a wussy way of doing things, but thing is, people tend to respond to texts more than they return phone calls. So it is tempting to send a text to get a "conversation" going and then call the person. Meanwhile, I got the message. I'm definitely calling though.
SmileFace Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Do you know for sure that she is not dating someone?
Oxy Moronovich Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Who cares if she's dating someone? Call her first. If she doesn't answer then leave a text. Do you have her FB? I'm saying all these things because people tend to change their contact info frequently.
Andy_K Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 If she is interested in seeing you again, it really won't matter if you text or call. 1
veggirl Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Yeah call first, I know people respond more quickly to texts, in general, but if she is a texter and not a phone talker, she will not answer the call but respond with a text if she is interested.
kofcydonia Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 What I've found useful is to use texting to set up a time to talk. People are busy, and sometimes it's easier to set a time to chat instead of right. now.
SJC2008 Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Texting is kind of a wussy way of doing things, but thing is, people tend to respond to texts more than they return phone calls. So it is tempting to send a text to get a "conversation" going and then call the person. Meanwhile, I got the message. I'm definitely calling though. Call first to be a gentleman and do so until you are sure she is ok with texting. I don't think it is wussy, it just depends on the woman. I really don't think it has to do with age either. The last woman I dated was impossible to get a hold of and she texted back to calls too and she's 32.
Jane2011 Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 (edited) I recently got in touch with a person I dated during the winter. I actually emailed, but said "Give me a call when you get some time. I'd like to catch up." (and I didn't ask questions or say anything that was going on with me, just the basic "Hey! It's been a while since we've talked...") I guess I felt most comfortable emailing because I know people don't check email constantly; hence, I could relax and calmly expect to hear from him 'in due time.' If I'd texted, I'd have been too quickly biting my nails and being nervous for a quick response. If I'd called, similar; I'd've been wondering "why didn't he answer?" (if he didn't) or nervous as to how he'd sound (receptive or not) if he picked up. What I did was the best way, I felt, because it gave him the option to call or not, depending on if he cared to talk to me. Edited April 19, 2012 by Jane2011 1
Oxy Moronovich Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 I recently got in touch with a person I dated during the winter. I actually emailed, but said "Give me a call when you get some time. I'd like to catch up." (and I didn't ask questions or say anything that was going on with me, just the basic "Hey! It's been a while since we've talked...") I guess I felt most comfortable emailing because I know people don't check email constantly; hence, I could relax and calmly expect to hear from him 'in due time.' If I'd texted, I'd have been too quickly biting my nails and being nervous for a quick response. If I'd called, similar; I'd've been wondering "why didn't he answer?" (if he didn't) or nervous as to how he'd sound (receptive or not) if he picked up. What I did was the best way, I felt, because it gave him the option to call or not, depending on if he cared to talk to me. Bad advice for a man. Women wait around and show interest passive-aggressively like you did. Guys should be direct and assertive. A roundabout way of getting in touch is lame. A guy should always be assertive when it comes to women. 2
Author Imajerk17 Posted April 19, 2012 Author Posted April 19, 2012 I recently got in touch with a person I dated during the winter. I actually emailed, but said "Give me a call when you get some time. I'd like to catch up." (and I didn't ask questions or say anything that was going on with me, just the basic "Hey! It's been a while since we've talked...") I guess I felt most comfortable emailing because I know people don't check email constantly; hence, I could relax and calmly expect to hear from him 'in due time.' If I'd texted, I'd have been too quickly biting my nails and being nervous for a quick response. If I'd called, similar; I'd've been wondering "why didn't he answer?" (if he didn't) or nervous as to how he'd sound (receptive or not) if he picked up. What I did was the best way, I felt, because it gave him the option to call or not, depending on if he cared to talk to me. Email is definitely less pressure than a text. I hope you hear back! In my situation though, I don't have her email. Well actually I do as we met online at Match, but I don't want to use that. I left a voicemail a few hours ago.
Author Imajerk17 Posted April 19, 2012 Author Posted April 19, 2012 Bad advice for a man. Women wait around and show interest passive-aggressively like you did. Guys should be direct and assertive. A roundabout way of getting in touch is lame. A guy should always be assertive when it comes to women. It depends how assertive you've been in the past. You can mix it up. That said I would never email a woman and tell her to call me.
M2155 Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 If we haven't talked in a long time, I would not be opposed to a text. Something like "hey Jane, would like to catch up, can I call you tonight?" or something like that. Hopefully she will say yes or no but at least you know she's open to it or not and it's less out of the blue for her.
Oxy Moronovich Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 It depends how assertive you've been in the past. You can mix it up. That said I would never email a woman and tell her to call me. Yeah. Asking a woman to call is always the dumbest idea. Women aren't proactive in dating. They always expect the man to initiate the most and put in the most effort. Asking a woman to call you is idiotic. Sorta like asking your doctor to remind you when you're next check-up is going to happen.
Jane2011 Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 Email is definitely less pressure than a text. I hope you hear back! In my situation though, I don't have her email. Well actually I do as we met online at Match, but I don't want to use that. I left a voicemail a few hours ago. I heard back very quickly. He called within eight hours of my sending the email. I see you've already made contact. Anyway, I can see some guy variations of what I did, though. Emailing and asking "When's a good time to call you this week? I want to talk." At least that way, you're making clear that you'll make the call, and she can sit back, not worry her pretty little head about anything, and be gloriously passive, lol. (But you still get the email buffer/safeness.)
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