Kamille Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I'm as single as they come. I've been single and prospectless since December. Men aren't throwing themselves at me or asking me to help them pick melons at the grocery store. I'm not ugly, but I'm not hot - I don't spend much time on my looks. And yet, I'm far from feeling anxiety about my romantic future. Today, as I checked out guys while walking into a cafe, I figured out why: I think I am one of the best kept secrets in my city. I seriously do. I'm kind, I'm funny, I'm not big on drama, I'm loyal, I value intimacy, I'm a good cook, I'm in shape and the list could go on. And the best part is, the fact I believe this about myself makes me walk around wondering who's going to "discover" me. It's fun, and it gives me courage to check out guys. What about you? What's your attitude about dating and how does it inform the ways in which you interact with the potential prospects? 18
Pyro Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Rome wasn't built in a day and neither does finding 'the one' It's best to not think about it and just go about your daily business. When you meet the right type of people it just comes natural when interacting with them.....IMO of course. 6
Els Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I think you are, too, hon. I think you are. And I think everybody can be, if they were as positive and nice as you about it! 2
Avarage Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I think dating is a good way to learn more about other people. Be they strange, nice, or that ever so rare combination of totally worth it. 1
Author Kamille Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 Your attitude is sexy:o Thanks sid. My attitude certainly makes me feel sexy. 1
USMCHokie Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I kinda feel this way too, though being in my city, it isn't saying much... Luckily we live in different cities...one wouldn't be big enough for the two of us... 2
Author Kamille Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 I think dating is a good way to learn more about other people. Be they strange, nice, or that ever so rare combination of totally worth it. That's a great way to see it. It takes the pressure off while being couteous and respectful of the people you meet. I like it.
Avarage Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Congrats, glad you're a catch. Can't tell if that's sarcasm or seriousness.....
Author Kamille Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 I kinda feel this way too, though being in my city, it isn't saying much... How do you mean? Luckily we live in different cities...one wouldn't be big enough for the two of us... Au contraire, I think a city filled with best kept secrets would turn into a permanent flirt-fest, much like the off-topic thread.
Author Kamille Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 Rome wasn't built in a day and neither does finding 'the one' It's best to not think about it and just go about your daily business. When you meet the right type of people it just comes natural when interacting with them.....IMO of course. I agree and at the same time I think that I have to be receptive to romantic opportunities.
verhrzn Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Can't tell if that's sarcasm or seriousness..... It was seriousness (I quite like the OP) with some... confusion? As in, I'm glad she likes herself, but it's... strange to create a thread being happy about how amazing she is. I think if I did that, I'd get laughed and mocked off the fac eof the Earth. But, I have a few female friends who do the similar things on FB, and are applauded for it. ("I am the most amazing person, I'm not an average girl in any way!" "Yeah you're amazing!") and I've never understood it there either, so... must just be that I'm in a different reality than others.
jobaba Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I'm as single as they come. I've been single and prospectless since December. Men aren't throwing themselves at me or asking me to help them pick melons at the grocery store. I'm not ugly, but I'm not hot - I don't spend much time on my looks. And yet, I'm far from feeling anxiety about my romantic future. Today, as I checked out guys while walking into a cafe, I figured out why: I think I am one of the best kept secrets in my city. I seriously do. I'm kind, I'm funny, I'm not big on drama, I'm loyal, I value intimacy, I'm a good cook, I'm in shape and the list could go on. And the best part is, the fact I believe this about myself makes me walk around wondering who's going to "discover" me. It's fun, and it gives me courage to check out guys. What about you? What's your attitude about dating and how does it inform the ways in which you interact with the potential prospects? Sounds like your pretty modest and down to Earth. I really appreciate that in women. I'm not sure what you expect in a mate but I'd probably go out on a date with you based on just what you wrote. I wouldn't even want to see a picture. And that doesn't mean I'm desperate. I have a girlfriend and I wouldn't date many women who have posted here whose pictures I also have not seen. I'm similar in that most of what I think I offer is on the inside. I really do think I'm a really good catch. I'm a good guy and when I get a woman I treat them like gold. My attitude towards dating is admittedly pretty sh@tty a lot of the times, but that's because I've faced a lot of rejection. But I'm finding ways to work on my bitterness issues. Those have never really ever come out when I get into a relationship with a woman, so I don't think it's a huge issue, but one I am cognizant of nonetheless. 1
NeverDated Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I think dating is a good way to learn more about other people. Be they strange, nice, or that ever so rare combination of totally worth it. I agree! In a way, I kind of miss dating. I adore being in a stable, loving relationship, but there was a lot of fun in the meeting people game. I never took it too seriously. People would either like me or they wouldn't, and I knew eventually the right person would come my way so it wasn't a rush. I used online dating sites, so, to me, it was always a smorgasbord of new people to get to know, to interact with and to present new ideas/interests. Also a really good way to learn about myself and why I hold the views I do.
Ruby Slippers Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I think if I did that, I'd get laughed and mocked off the fac eof the Earth. I think it'd be great if you started a thread about your good points. 4
Author Kamille Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 It was seriousness (I quite like the OP) with some... confusion? As in, I'm glad she likes herself, but it's... strange to create a thread being happy about how amazing she is. I think if I did that, I'd get laughed and mocked off the fac eof the Earth. But, I have a few female friends who do the similar things on FB, and are applauded for it. ("I am the most amazing person, I'm not an average girl in any way!" "Yeah you're amazing!") and I've never understood it there either, so... must just be that I'm in a different reality than others. I created the thread as part of an affirmation and as part of a counter-balance to the threads on here which are anxiety focused. And notice, nowhere in my OP did I say that I was the most amazing person. I said I have a lot of great qualities that make me approach dating in a fairly anxiety-free way. I really believe that the man who will fall in love with me will be a lucky man. Not because I'm outstanding at anything, but because I think I'm a pretty kick ass person. (One is not the same as the other). I recommend trying it . 3
NeverDated Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I created the thread as part of an affirmation and as part of a counter-balance to the threads on here which are anxiety focused. And notice, nowhere in my OP did I say that I was the most amazing person. I said I have a lot of great qualities that make me approach dating in a fairly anxiety-free way. I really believe that the man who will fall in love with me will be a lucky man. Not because I'm outstanding at anything, but because I think I'm a pretty kick ass person. (One is not the same as the other). I recommend trying it . What? You are in love with yourself and feel that someday you will find someone who shares that view? Until then, you are not stressing about why you are single? Such talk is crazy and should not be allowed. 1
betterdeal Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Would someone please help me weigh my melons? They're quite cumbersome. 2
Author Kamille Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 I'm similar in that most of what I think I offer is on the inside. I really do think I'm a really good catch. I'm a good guy and when I get a woman I treat them like gold. My attitude towards dating is admittedly pretty sh@tty a lot of the times, but that's because I've faced a lot of rejection. But I'm finding ways to work on my bitterness issues. Those have never really ever come out when I get into a relationship with a woman, so I don't think it's a huge issue, but one I am cognizant of nonetheless. Treating them like gold is a good way of putting it. I definitely want to treat my future partner like gold, and think I have a fairly consistent record of doing so with past partners. I have yet to experience feeling bitter from rejection. I have faced rejection a few times - but, after the initial burn, I tend to see it as : "Ah well, we don't agree that we could be compatible, so that makes us incompatible." Quite mathematical, but it helps me not dwell on it. I agree! In a way, I kind of miss dating. I adore being in a stable, loving relationship, but there was a lot of fun in the meeting people game. I never took it too seriously. People would either like me or they wouldn't, and I knew eventually the right person would come my way so it wasn't a rush. I used online dating sites, so, to me, it was always a smorgasbord of new people to get to know, to interact with and to present new ideas/interests. Also a really good way to learn about myself and why I hold the views I do. Love it.
betterdeal Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I'm a good guy and when I get a woman I treat them like gold. You take them to the pawnbrokers and swap 'em for cash to invest at the bookmakers? 1
Feelsgoodman Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 It was seriousness (I quite like the OP) with some... confusion? As in, I'm glad she likes herself, but it's... strange to create a thread being happy about how amazing she is. I think if I did that, I'd get laughed s, firand mocked off the fac eof the Earth. But, I have a few female friends who do the similar things on FB, and are applauded for it. ("I am the most amazing person, I'm not an average girl in any way!" "Yeah you're amazing!") and I've never understood it there either, so... must just be that I'm in a different reality than others. People who do this usually have doubts about themselves and are trying to make themselves feel better by saying what they wish was true. Same thing with women posting "inspirational" quotes about relationships and such in their status updates.
USMCHokie Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 How do you mean? I live in a small town adjacent to a military base in the desert out in the middle of nowhere. My exposure to non-military is limited, at best. Au contraire, I think a city filled with best kept secrets would turn into a permanent flirt-fest, much like the off-topic thread. Hahah, but you inherently wouldn't know who said secrets were, so you'd be flirting recklessly with blind eye...unless that was the whole point if this revelation... But that would be fun.
Author Kamille Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 You take them to the pawnbrokers and swap 'em for cash to invest at the bookmakers? :lmao: Damn these thin walls. My coworkers will be wondering which part of marking I find laugh out loud hilarious.
reallyhotguy Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Little do you know, I've already patented your secret. So no matter whichever new hot guy discovers you, only I will be legally entitled to the rewards! hehehehe 2
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