concretemielie Posted June 18, 2004 Posted June 18, 2004 I'm in love with a girl that's 4 years younger than me. I'm 19 and she's almost 15. I know its awfully young but I really think she's amazing. It's also a long distance thing, and there is no sex involved at the moment. Are my feelings normal? Is it okay? I would love some good advice, no flaming please, if you disagree, simply say so and why.
sportsloving Posted June 18, 2004 Posted June 18, 2004 My grandparents were married at the age of 15 and stayed married all their lives ever after. I can't say anything about the age except that I think if you really and truly believe you love her, you should not be willing to let the relationship go to sexual until she is at least 18. I would hate for you to get into trouble with the law if something were to happen. I do wish you the best of luck and hope things work out for you
faux Posted June 19, 2004 Posted June 19, 2004 Originally posted by concretemielie I'm in love with a girl that's 4 years younger than me. I'm 19 and she's almost 15. I know its awfully young but I really think she's amazing. It's also a long distance thing, and there is no sex involved at the moment. Are my feelings normal? Is it okay? I would love some good advice, no flaming please, if you disagree, simply say so and why. A person who is age 18 or older cannot legally be with a person who is younger than the age of 18. In most states, kissing this girl at your age would be a felony. I believe that this relationship, even though long distance, is wrong. I feel that you at your age have no business associating with a 15 year old girl in such a manner. I would recommend that you find someone 18 or older to pursue any type of relationship with.
clia Posted June 19, 2004 Posted June 19, 2004 A person who is age 18 or older cannot legally be with a person who is younger than the age of 18. Untrue. Age of consent varies by state--it is usually between 16-18. In most states, kissing this girl at your age would be a felony. Untrue. Having sex with her would be a felony--kissing her would not.
msrealdoll Posted June 19, 2004 Posted June 19, 2004 I don't know if it's wrong or not, but I think it's a very bad idea. If you were 24 and her 20, there wouldn't be so much of a difference. But the differences between someone who is 19 and someone 14 are HUGE. A person matures and changes so much between 14 and 19. It's the difference between child and adult. I would have never allowed my daughter to date someone 19 years old when she was 14. Are her parents aware of the relationship?
Pyrannaste Posted June 19, 2004 Posted June 19, 2004 When I was 14-15 I knew a few girls who had 19 years old boyfriends. A male friend of mine at 21 dated a girl of 16 (who was btw mistreating him and cheating on him). Over here the age of consent here is 14 but if you have sex with someone who is 14-16 and you are 18 or more you could have legal trouble (from her/his family usually). I'd probably be pretty worried if I had a 15 years old daughter who dated a 19 years old, but I guess I could accept it if I met him and he looked really like a nice guy. Anyway I see it happen quite often. If her parents and yours are aware of the relationship and are okay with it, go for it, but I recommend you don't meet her behind her parents'back for whatever reason!!! Ask your girlfriend to meet them, when you meet them don't lie about your age or anything else, and if they forbide her to date you, try to accept it. The best of luck to you.
UCFKevin Posted June 19, 2004 Posted June 19, 2004 Stick with someone around your own age. How much can you have in common with someone who can't even legally drive on her own?
Good2Go Posted June 19, 2004 Posted June 19, 2004 Ain't it crazy? You can't vote or buy liquor, but your too old to date another teen? Ask her folks for permission to date her. Bring a witness. Then go where your heart leads ya!
supermom Posted June 19, 2004 Posted June 19, 2004 I am 25 and my Husband is 30. The age difference doesn't seem like much now, but we met when I was 16 and he was 21. My parents would not let me date him then, but when you are older the age differences are not so bad. Also, our maturity levels were different back then, but now, seems like we are on the same page...does that make sence? She is also not done maturing, and if my daughter was 15 I would not want her dating someone 18 or 19. Of course if she was 18 and he was say, 23 or 24, it would be a little different. Not a good idea at this time, but maybe when she gets a little older? At best do not have sex with her until she is 18, you could get yourself in major trouble. My sister used to be friends with this girl who was 16 and dated a few older men. If they would piss her off, she'd call the cops on them for statutory rape. Some girls are like that. BE CAREFUL.
Samson Posted June 19, 2004 Posted June 19, 2004 Hi, I teach 14 year old girls Math. So, I know what they are like, and yes, they can and do appear to be older.....old enough to be attractive to "normal" 19 year old males. However, you clearly know how old the girl is. You're not "mistaken." Find someone around your own age (legal) or be prepared to deal with the law, or worse, her father. If it was my daughter, you cajones would be missing by now.
Sky002 Posted July 12, 2004 Posted July 12, 2004 I'm not sure of the capacity of love you and your girlfriend are in or how far you have taken the relationship at this point--but you should know by now that your skating on some pretty thin ice. I'm 18 and I have/had a girlfriend who had just turned 14 so I know exactly where you're coming from in terms of how you feel for one another. But there are way to many outside factors that could ruin your relationship including her teachers, who could call you up to the authorities due to your age--or worse yet--her parents! It's hard to understand these things while your still in the relationship, but sadly, you really don't have much of a choice at this point. If you're love is strong enough, you can wait till she comes of age. But until then, you really have to ask yourself if your passions are worth the risks. Would it be eaier for her to softly love you from afar than to desperatly need you from the opposite side of jail bars? Best of luck
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