SilverBlueAndGold Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 To the day. Four weeks ago we had our blowout, she walked out on me but I was wanting to end it sooner and lacked the backbone. The first week was strange, in that I missed her but was also relieved. The second was much worse since I broke NC and we tried to talk but it did not go well. She got very, very angry and childish and the insults and blame was non stop. Then a few days later she apologized again and had a fantasy of us someday trying again. That was when it really hit me, I broke down early one morning and let it all out. But I soldiered on. The days were foggy and the nights long but slowly I got used to missing the daily contact. She blew that all out of the water again with an all day barrage of emails, calls and driving by my place. Very weird. That night is when I got the extremelly aggressive "**** yous I hate you" texts, which is when I took steps to completely block everything. Because even if it is just the pain talking it is of no use to me and I do not need the stress when I am trying my best to be civil and just fade away. Didn'thear anything for a while then the weird anonymous emails and texts started pouring in and my sadness started to get sprinkled with pity. Today I still miss her. Even though I know we are 100% incompatible, I know that she is immature and has emotional issues that she refuses to address. There is no going back, I accept that. I really wish the best for her, I hope she finds what she is looking for and can be happy. One month later....one day at a time.
tommycapnpants Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 (edited) same here brother. one month later and one day at a time. this is the third time she has broken up with me, and damn each time gets worse. i was getting along much better. took a trip to new orleans, and then one to visit my folks in west texas each of the past two weekends. met some interesting and fun girls...in new orleans and on the plane to texas. but, then i get a damn text from her yesterday saying "i have blocked all your facebook status updates because they upset me, and i am still depressed from the breakup." not once did i post anything negative about her, us nor the breakup. just simple post about traveling, golf, gym, surfing, etc. wtf? she dumped my ass. kicked my butt to the curb. you know what is really f@cking pathetic? after leaving the crossfit gym this morning i started crying in my car while driving home. it has happened twice. i dont know why. maybe it is because the work outs are pretty damn intense and my body and mind are completely blown afterwards. or maybe i just need some mother effin help. shucks, sorry for hijacking your post. o, and how the heck do you block someone's status updates on fb without defriending them or blocking them completely? because, it depresses the hell out of me when i see updates from her too. but, i dont want to cut her off completely. i feel it would make me look weak. ONE DAY AT A TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!! Edited April 18, 2012 by tommycapnpants
HollyBolly Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 but, then i get a damn text from her yesterday saying "i have blocked all your facebook status updates because they upset me, and i am still depressed from the breakup." not once did i post anything negative about her, us nor the breakup. just simple post about traveling, golf, gym, surfing, etc. wtf? she dumped my ass. kicked my butt to the curb. She's angry you seem to be moving on swimmingly. She wants to read about how you're wallowing in self pity. If I were you, I would unfriend and block her on FB. you know what is really f@cking pathetic? after leaving the crossfit gym this morning i started crying in my car while driving home. it has happened twice. i dont know why. maybe it is because the work outs are pretty damn intense and my body and mind are completely blown afterwards. or maybe i just need some mother effin help. Nothing pathetic about crying. If anything, it helps. Cry whenever you feel you need to. It helps you release tension and sorrow.
Author SilverBlueAndGold Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 same here brother. one month later and one day at a time. this is the third time she has broken up with me, and damn each time gets worse. i was getting along much better. took a trip to new orleans, and then one to visit my folks in west texas each of the past two weekends. met some interesting and fun girls...in new orleans and on the plane to texas. but, then i get a damn text from her yesterday saying "i have blocked all your facebook status updates because they upset me, and i am still depressed from the breakup." not once did i post anything negative about her, us nor the breakup. just simple post about traveling, golf, gym, surfing, etc. wtf? she dumped my ass. kicked my butt to the curb. you know what is really f@cking pathetic? after leaving the crossfit gym this morning i started crying in my car while driving home. it has happened twice. i dont know why. maybe it is because the work outs are pretty damn intense and my body and mind are completely blown afterwards. or maybe i just need some mother effin help. shucks, sorry for hijacking your post. o, and how the heck do you block someone's status updates on fb without defriending them or blocking them completely? because, it depresses the hell out of me when i see updates from her too. but, i dont want to cut her off completely. i feel it would make me look weak. ONE DAY AT A TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's ok, no need for apologies. We are brothers in arms! And never, ever get down on yourself about crying. Screw the worldview of it being weakness, it's not. Weakness is not admitting that something hurts and dealing with it. Weakness is staying in a situation that you know is bad for you. Weakness is losing your self respect. We are strong! 2
tommycapnpants Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 youre right brother. we are in this together. i am using this time to try to get myself focused on other things. i have a promotion at work coming up in july that i need to focus on. and doing crossfit is a major plus. additionally, lots of cute, fit girls in those classes. i also just joined The Pit. its an MMA gym here in vegas. I used to train when I lived in Hawaii, and it helps get a lot of aggression out. I def recommend trying one of those types of gyms. on a side note, i just posted this in the coping section but my ex just texted me twice out of the blue a few minutes ago. "i miss you everyday. i wish i knew what i wanted. i wish i had met you later in life." and then seconds later this one "i hate myself everyday." what should i do with this? again, one month ago to the day she broke my heart.
dsw31 Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 Wow! I just looked at the calender & today is exactly 1 month since my break up too! First 2 weeks we had some exchanges through texts but, he's been totally silent for 16 days now.I have some ok days & some gut wrenching horrible days.I'm usually the saddest right, when I wake up & then again at night,when I realize another day/night has passed and he hasn't tried contacting me.Weekends are the absolute worst for me though. One day at a time is right Silver,Blue & Gold! We will get through this
GaelicSoul Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 I remember when i was 1 month NC, and that was about 1 1/2 years. Things will get better, "remember when your going through hell, keep going"
HollyBolly Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 I remember when i was 1 month NC, and that was about 1 1/2 years. Things will get better, "remember when your going through hell, keep going" How do feel now? Do you still or are you still looking forward to her contacting you? What would you do if she did?
GaelicSoul Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 (edited) I'm very happy. I have achieved a lot in the last 14 months. I got to travel the world, got a better job and gave up cigarettes lol! I feel happy, and i also recently met a beautiful wonderful woman, so we are taking things slow. Anyway, its amazing how much things can change in a year, if you want it too. What would i do if she contacted me after nearly 18 months? Well I would listen to what she would have to say firstly. I can handle that now, and if she wanted me back, then I would let her actions speak for themselves. But she has a boyfriend, and i presume they are happy. I don't know anything about her life any more. She lives in a different country Never rely on other people for your happiness. Stay focused on what you want, and be true to yourself. Once your honest with yourself, you will never go wrong. I dont think about my Ex much these days anymore. I hope shes doing ok with her life, and i don't wish any ills against her. I found closure in myself, and became a better stronger wiser man out of the whole episode. I am happy. Edited April 19, 2012 by GaelicSoul 3
Author SilverBlueAndGold Posted April 19, 2012 Author Posted April 19, 2012 I'm very happy. I have achieved a lot in the last 14 months. I got to travel the world, got a better job and gave up cigarettes lol! I feel happy, and i also recently met a beautiful wonderful woman, so we are taking things slow. Anyway, its amazing how much things can change in a year, if you want it too. What would i do if she contacted me after nearly 18 months? Well I would listen to what she would have to say firstly. I can handle that now, and if she wanted me back, then I would let her actions speak for themselves. But she has a boyfriend, and i presume they are happy. I don't know anything about her life any more. She lives in a different country Never rely on other people for your happiness. Stay focused on what you want, and be true to yourself. Once your honest with yourself, you will never go wrong. I dont think about my Ex much these days anymore. I hope shes doing ok with her life, and i don't wish any ills against her. I found closure in myself, and became a better stronger wiser man out of the whole episode. I am happy. This is very encouraging.
Author SilverBlueAndGold Posted April 19, 2012 Author Posted April 19, 2012 on a side note, i just posted this in the coping section but my ex just texted me twice out of the blue a few minutes ago. "i miss you everyday. i wish i knew what i wanted. i wish i had met you later in life." and then seconds later this one "i hate myself everyday." what should i do with this? I don't know your whole story, but this sounds like breadcrumbs. Especially the "later in life" comment. On the surface it seems positive but it has a "You are not for me right now" ring to it. You don't need that. I would stay NC
Meg717 Posted April 19, 2012 Posted April 19, 2012 how the heck do you block someone's status updates on fb without defriending them or blocking them completely? because, it depresses the hell out of me when i see updates from her too. but, i dont want to cut her off completely. i feel it would make me look weak. When they come up in your timeline, in the top left corner there is an option to unsubscribe to their posts.
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