guccimane99 Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 So i have been seeing this girl for a while at the begining she was in germany and was in a relationship. We instantly clicked we have so much in common such as we played the same sport, we both practice are faith which is the same. Our families are alike in so many ways and we both are really goofy. She says she sees a future with me and all this great things. There is just one thing she was all like everyone thinks were perfect together and she was like all my friends are asking why aren't we dating and kept brining it up and then after we hung out one night i asked her and she said you haven't met my family yet. Which at the time i was like wow seriously but i thought was a good thing cuz shes thinking long term. She then tells me that her brothers best friend asked her to formal and what i thought. I told her u can do what u want because were not offical and even if we are i have no right to tell u what to do because ur gonna do what ur gonna do regeradless of what i say. Then she brings up saying that her friend says the only reason a guy asks a girl to formal is to have sex. I said u need to do what you want. She said ur making its seem like u dont care or its just ur niceness. She told me not to worry that they were just friends. Which dont worry means to me worry cuz last time i heard that my ex left me for some guy who fights with her all the time. So i guess i won the war. My real question is do i give up cuz honestly she acts like she wants to date and tries to have sex but wont commit cuz of that reason yet tells me shes going to formal. I am getting red flags everywhere what should i do?
Author guccimane99 Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 anyones can give me some solid advice it would greatly be appreciated?
Emilia Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 So i have been seeing this girl for a while at the begining she was in germany and was in a relationship. We instantly clicked we have so much in common such as we played the same sport, we both practice are faith which is the same. Our families are alike in so many ways and we both are really goofy. She says she sees a future with me and all this great things. There is just one thing she was all like everyone thinks were perfect together and she was like all my friends are asking why aren't we dating and kept brining it up and then after we hung out one night i asked her and she said you haven't met my family yet. Which at the time i was like wow seriously but i thought was a good thing cuz shes thinking long term. She then tells me that her brothers best friend asked her to formal and what i thought. I told her u can do what u want because were not offical and even if we are i have no right to tell u what to do because ur gonna do what ur gonna do regeradless of what i say. Then she brings up saying that her friend says the only reason a guy asks a girl to formal is to have sex. I said u need to do what you want. She said ur making its seem like u dont care or its just ur niceness. She told me not to worry that they were just friends. Which dont worry means to me worry cuz last time i heard that my ex left me for some guy who fights with her all the time. So i guess i won the war. My real question is do i give up cuz honestly she acts like she wants to date and tries to have sex but wont commit cuz of that reason yet tells me shes going to formal. I am getting red flags everywhere what should i do? Well, I think you need to learn to use grammar and punctuation, it's very hard to make sense of your text. I THINK from what I can comprehend is that she was playing a game with you to see whether you would get jealous about her being asked to a 'formal'. I have no idea what a 'formal' is however. She is young and immature and she needs validation from you. If you find that tiresome, she is not the right girl for you.
TaraMaiden Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 First of all, what is 'formal'...? I have no idea what that is, or what you're asking here... secondly...please type properly,.... you don't have to use text-speak.. there's no charge, no word limit and no period of time limit... so it's far easier to be able to answer a post more comprehensively if you post more legibly. if I read this right, I think she wants you to object to her going out with this guy. she's hoping you would be jealous, which would indicate to her how you feel about her.
TaraMaiden Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I really haven't ever seen 2 posts back to back that say virtually the same thing, so that's really cool....! 1
Radu Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 So i have been seeing this girl for a while at the begining she was in germany and was in a relationship. We instantly clicked we have so much in common such as we played the same sport, we both practice are faith which is the same. Our families are alike in so many ways and we both are really goofy. She says she sees a future with me and all this great things. There is just one thing she was all like everyone thinks were perfect together and she was like all my friends are asking why aren't we dating and kept brining it up and then after we hung out one night i asked her and she said you haven't met my family yet. Which at the time i was like wow seriously but i thought was a good thing cuz shes thinking long term. She then tells me that her brothers best friend asked her to formal and what i thought. I told her u can do what u want because were not offical and even if we are i have no right to tell u what to do because ur gonna do what ur gonna do regeradless of what i say. Then she brings up saying that her friend says the only reason a guy asks a girl to formal is to have sex. I said u need to do what you want. She said ur making its seem like u dont care or its just ur niceness. She told me not to worry that they were just friends. Which dont worry means to me worry cuz last time i heard that my ex left me for some guy who fights with her all the time. So i guess i won the war. My real question is do i give up cuz honestly she acts like she wants to date and tries to have sex but wont commit cuz of that reason yet tells me shes going to formal. I am getting red flags everywhere what should i do? She was testing you for jealousy. PS: All guys want sex, all women want sex ... never apologize for wanting or enjoying it. Not only is it fake, but it also shows as fake.
Author guccimane99 Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 Well its 4 a.m. and im in not in the write mindset for proper grammar. Formal is what guys ask girls to if they are at a university. Its like a dance that everyone goes to almost like a college prom.
Author guccimane99 Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 Radu that is not true im 21 and a virgin by choice because i haven't found the right woman to lose it too. I've dated and had tons of flings with alot of girls and as soon as they find out im a virgin they see it as a challenge. They date me and after a month they give up and move on. Its like wanting what you can have.
Emilia Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I've dated and had tons of flings with alot of girls and as soon as they find out im a virgin they see it as a challenge. They date me and after a month they give up and move on. Its like wanting what you can have. So she wants sex and you don't? I wouldn't stick around either.
Author guccimane99 Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 No i just want to wait till i feel its right not lose it to someone whose gonna sleep with everyone like my ex's. They leave me go on a sex feast and realize that they took me for granted like most do. She claims not to but we have been seeing each other for a couple months and we dry humped and she soaked my shorts. She tells me all the time she sees a future and she'll come visit when i move to a "real" university next year. I just dont know if shes tell me this to get in my pants or if she really does because ive been ****ed over alot like anyone else but i have more at stake then most at my age.
Emilia Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 No i just want to wait till i feel its right not lose it to someone whose gonna sleep with everyone like my ex's. They leave me go on a sex feast and realize that they took me for granted like most do. She claims not to but we have been seeing each other for a couple months and we dry humped and she soaked my shorts. She tells me all the time she sees a future and she'll come visit when i move to a "real" university next year. I just dont know if shes tell me this to get in my pants or if she really does because ive been ****ed over alot like anyone else but i have more at stake then most at my age. I think you need to get over your insecurities. You can't say you have been 'f***d over' by others when you had a handful of dates with girls and you never had sex. As one poster put it here once, 'if you don't have sex you are only friends' and there is a lot of truth in that. Your exes are in their late teens, early 20s I assume. Of course they go on a sex fest, it's what people do at your age. Hell, it's what people do at mine. Completely natural. It may not be your thing but you need to give a girl what she wants otherwise she will look for it somewhere else. Who does she have to be to prove to you that she is special? Maybe they got fed up with trying to win your approval perhaps??
Radu Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Maybe you want to stay a virgin untill marriage, or untill the stars align, but she doesn't. Most ppl start having sexual fantasies when they are 11, and i bet that she is not a virgin. If you want this cycle to stop (you say you are virgin, they decide to get into your pants), than say you are NOT a virgin. It's not like you have a damn hymen that they can check.
Author guccimane99 Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 There not really insecurities they are "red flags" and the thing is ur right girls at my age are looking for a sex fest but, i dont want that type of girl who would have sex with anyone i want it to mean something. The media has stereotyped it as something that people do such as playing a sport. They dont show the bad of its such as teenage pregnancy...teen mom... So yes i want to be careful so that i dont ruin my life because its a shame how many girls my age are pregnant. I respect myself and i want a girl who respects herself. Honestly, the more guys u have sex with isnt a good thing you may be more "experienced" but, when it comes to it u can get disease and from where im from its frowned upon to run around and have sex theres a word for girls like that and that is a slut. I can understand having sex in a "commited relationship" but just runing around having sex is a joke. I want my first time to mean something and not to be just a one night stand because u can only lose it once.
Author guccimane99 Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 I think you need to get over your insecurities. You can't say you have been 'f***d over' by others when you had a handful of dates with girls and you never had sex. As one poster put it here once, 'if you don't have sex you are only friends' and there is a lot of truth in that. Your exes are in their late teens, early 20s I assume. Of course they go on a sex fest, it's what people do at your age. Hell, it's what people do at mine. Completely natural. It may not be your thing but you need to give a girl what she wants otherwise she will look for it somewhere else. Who does she have to be to prove to you that she is special? Maybe they got fed up with trying to win your approval perhaps?? See another thing i dont like its this 'if you don't have sex you are only friends' and there is a lot of truth in that. This irritates me sex isn't EVERYTHING for a girl with morals. The third girl i dated in high school was a virgin and took dating seriously. We dated for three months and its was better than getting head or giving a girl a sexual pleasure. Let me tell you one thing SEX ISN"T EVERYTHING. If you want to see a real realtionship date a guy and dont have sex because if he truly loves u it wouldn't matter.
Emilia Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I want my first time to mean something and not to be just a one night stand because u can only lose it once. I felt this way too when I was a virgin and believe me it's over-rated. Sex gets much more special after that. You will be way too nervous and probably climax early to really appreciate it. I can fully appreciate that you want someone with good character. I think at your age though most people are not fully formed in terms of personality traits and not that many are responsible.
Radu Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 There not really insecurities they are "red flags" and the thing is ur right girls at my age are looking for a sex fest but, i dont want that type of girl who would have sex with anyone i want it to mean something. The media has stereotyped it as something that people do such as playing a sport. They dont show the bad of its such as teenage pregnancy...teen mom... So yes i want to be careful so that i dont ruin my life because its a shame how many girls my age are pregnant. I respect myself and i want a girl who respects herself. Honestly, the more guys u have sex with isnt a good thing you may be more "experienced" but, when it comes to it u can get disease and from where im from its frowned upon to run around and have sex theres a word for girls like that and that is a slut. I can understand having sex in a "commited relationship" but just runing around having sex is a joke. I want my first time to mean something and not to be just a one night stand because u can only lose it once. Well ... not exactly. The first time you penetrate a vagina. The first time you penetrate an ass (not the animal). The first time she goes down on you. The first time you go down on her. The first time you get a titty****. The first time she slips a finger in your behind. The first time you do it in the open. The first time you do it in the shower. etc... There will always be a lot of first times, and it will be the first time with each new partner. Also, big difference between having sex and making love. You are describing the latter with the former as a label.
Emilia Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 See another thing i dont like its this 'if you don't have sex you are only friends' and there is a lot of truth in that. This irritates me sex isn't EVERYTHING for a girl with morals. The third girl i dated in high school was a virgin and took dating seriously. We dated for three months and its was better than getting head or giving a girl a sexual pleasure. Let me tell you one thing SEX ISN"T EVERYTHING. If you want to see a real realtionship date a guy and dont have sex because if he truly loves u it wouldn't matter. With all respect you are saying this because you are a virgin and because you have never had a long term relationship. 3 months is nothing, that barely qualifies as dating. Sex is what keeps people together through thick and thin because you form the sort of intimacy that cannot be created in other ways. There are times when you fight with the other person, you realise they have traits that annoy you or upset you and vica versa. Then that person shows just how much she loves you by coming as close to you as no-one else can in the world and THAT makes all your compromises worth while. Having sex is not some animal act, you have to deal with whatever weird religious objections you have to it.
Author guccimane99 Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 Well ... not exactly. The first time you penetrate a vagina. The first time you penetrate an ass (not the animal). The first time she goes down on you. The first time you go down on her. The first time you get a titty****. The first time she slips a finger in your behind. The first time you do it in the open. The first time you do it in the shower. etc... There will always be a lot of first times, and it will be the first time with each new partner. Also, big difference between having sex and making love. You are describing the latter with the former as a label. First off if u have ever had animal sex im sorry hahhaha. Second i would never due anal because i told myself that and also stories and just knowing that nothing good comes from anal. Ur right there will be a first time but this is first time having sexual intercourse. I want it to mean something and i want to remember it with someone i loved wether or not its all its craked up to be. I just want to look back and say i had sex with someone i loved and cared about not someone who spreads there legs open for anyone. If i was like that id be like mostly everyone else but i see sex as something to people who love each other do.
Author guccimane99 Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 With all respect you are saying this because you are a virgin and because you have never had a long term relationship. 3 months is nothing, that barely qualifies as dating. Sex is what keeps people together through thick and thin because you form the sort of intimacy that cannot be created in other ways. There are times when you fight with the other person, you realise they have traits that annoy you or upset you and vica versa. Then that person shows just how much she loves you by coming as close to you as no-one else can in the world and THAT makes all your compromises worth while. Having sex is not some animal act, you have to deal with whatever weird religious objections you have to it. Ur right but sex shouldn't be the end all be all of a realtionship because if u cant accept the person for who they are why even be with them cuz the sex is great. Loving someone doesn't mean great sex it means accepting them and loving them fully even for their faults. Also sidenote every single one of my so called "friends" has came back and told me that im a special guy and wanted to try my ex has tried for almost a year after she broke up why because i dont see sex as the end all be all of realtionships. When u get older and ur husband cant get it up even with viagra will u still be with him according to ur sex comment..no. Loving someone does involve sex ur right but its not the whole reason to be with someone or stay. You should stay with them because its what u want and because u can see a future and because u want to, not because the sex is great. If u stay with someone just because of sex then im sorry that u never really had a real relationship.
TaraMaiden Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Please - WRITE - PROPERLY-!!! I'll tell you why - Because there is nothing puts a young university-educated lady off so much as someone who seems incapable of communicating effectively with the written word! Trust me - guys have been dumped for less!! Sex is only 5% of a relationship, when everything else is fine - but an inability to be able to discuss matters coherently in the written format is not going to be overlooked. and that's not being shallow - that's being selective.....
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