dsw31 Posted April 17, 2012 Posted April 17, 2012 I just have this overwhelming urge to text me ex to try to make him feel bad & guilty.I want him to know that I do not forgive him & I would never be his friend after dumping me.I want him to know that I hate him for all of the pain he is causing me.I want to wish him nothing but bad luck in his life.I want to tell him that I can't wait until he fails his drug test next month & fails miserably with every decision he has made. I know in my heart that this wouldn't do me any good.I just want him to feel bad about everything he has done to me.I heard that the opposite of love is indifference.I guess by me hating him,it means I still love him so,I don't want him to know I still love him.So I keep that in mind & that's why I have not texted him yet but...it's so hard! It's been 15 days of NC now & we broke up almost a month ago.Maybe he doesn't even care that we are not talking.Maybe he is relieved because he doesn't have to hear how much I'm hurting.I just need some wise words right now.Has anyone ever sent hate texts after being dumped?What's the worst that can happen?
Philosoraptor Posted April 17, 2012 Posted April 17, 2012 The pleasure from bringing another pain is but temporary, the shame from it will last forever. It's fine to be angry. But use that motivation to better yourself and raise yourself up, rather than bringing someone else down. My current signature might offer some words of wisdom.
Chi townD Posted April 17, 2012 Posted April 17, 2012 JUST LET IT OUT!!! VENT AWAY!!!!!....but keep it here. If you go off on a tirade on him, the ONLY thing you're doing is going to convince him that breaking up with you was the best thing to do because you are bat sh*t crazy. Just ignore him not worth your time. Maybe one day he'll contact you and you can respond calmly. Him: Hey, How's it going? You: I AM AWESOME!! But...sorry to hear about your situation. Him: What situation? You: Word on the street is that you caught herpes. Him: WHAT?!?! I DON'T HAVE HERPES!!!! You: Uh huh.....right. Well, good luck with that! I got to go, my boyfriend is picking me up. Remember to take your valtrex!!!!!
xxSRMxx Posted April 17, 2012 Posted April 17, 2012 Nope. I have constantly broke NC just to let my ex know how much he has hurt me, how guilty he should feel, how sorry i am, if we can try again, how much i hate him for how hes made me feel, how he promised not to break my heart but he has.... It hasn't worked in getting him back, n it hasnt made me feel ANY better, hes just become angry with me and said im not helping myself. Youve done remarkably well to do 15 days NC (compared to me) dont break it
SilverBlueAndGold Posted April 17, 2012 Posted April 17, 2012 Consider yourself talked out of it!!! Now go do something: get busy, dance, clean, drive, shop, jump, skip, walk, run, anything!
Author dsw31 Posted April 17, 2012 Author Posted April 17, 2012 Thanks for the words of wisdom guys. Even though I know you are right. I am so angry.This is our 3rd & final breakup.I am pretty sure he doesn't want to make it work.The reason I'm so angry is throughtout our other 2 breakups,he would always toss me breadcrumbs.Now that he has stopped(I told him not to contact me because it gives me hope)It makes me wonder why he texted all throughout our other breakups.I think it was to ease his guilt & to try to make the breakup more comfortable for both of us.I actually resent him for that.Now I resent him for his silence.I just want him to know that I hate him.I want him to know that his behavior has caused so much damage! I will stay strong(hopefully)It makes me sick that he can be doing good being without me.Who knows though-he might be miserable too. It's really tough on me because I work by his house & have to drive past his car all the time.I noticed that he took the day off yesterday & my mind went crazy thinking about all kinds of reasons why he is not at work.I thought he may have partied too much on the weekend or maybe he had a good night of sex & was tired & even thought he took off because he was sad that we haven't spoken(egotistical I know,but like I said in my other post-I have the "I can't believe he don't want me"syndrome)I guess my silence will just have to speak volumes.Anyone else got stories of sending hate texts?
SilverBlueAndGold Posted April 17, 2012 Posted April 17, 2012 Thanks for the words of wisdom guys. Even though I know you are right. I am so angry.This is our 3rd & final breakup.I am pretty sure he doesn't want to make it work.The reason I'm so angry is throughtout our other 2 breakups,he would always toss me breadcrumbs.Now that he has stopped(I told him not to contact me because it gives me hope)It makes me wonder why he texted all throughout our other breakups.I think it was to ease his guilt & to try to make the breakup more comfortable for both of us. You could be on to something there, in fact he may not even be aware of how much it is hurting you. Us guys are not always known for being the most discerning creatures on the planet. I actually resent him for that.Now I resent him for his silence.I just want him to know that I hate him.I want him to know that his behavior has caused so much damage! I will stay strong(hopefully)It makes me sick that he can be doing good being without me.Who knows though-he might be miserable too. That's right, you don't know! You are assuming. Instead of using that energy to dream up all sorts of scenarios, most of which are painful to you, redirect it someplace else. You are going to burn yourself out with this! I speak from experience, because I struggle with this day to day. What has helped me some is diving head first into my work. I think these past few weeks have been the most productive of my entire life! .Anyone else got stories of sending hate texts? Ya know I have to say that I don't have any. At least not of me doing the sending. Have gotten plenty of them, and they hurt. But I have not reciprocated. She has tried baiting me with hurtful things hoping I would defend myself but I have remained silent. It's not that I don't care, and it's not that I do not miss her. I do care and I do miss her. But I need this time alone to heal, because I know we can never be together, we are just incompatible. The best I can hope for is to ride out this storm and maybe someday down the road we can both look back with some fondness for the good times and the sting of the bad times will not seem so great. Maybe you can look at it from a similar perspective? Keep moving!!
BewitchedandBothered Posted April 17, 2012 Posted April 17, 2012 I just have this overwhelming urge to text me ex to try to make him feel bad & guilty.I want him to know that I do not forgive him & I would never be his friend after dumping me.I want him to know that I hate him for all of the pain he is causing me.I want to wish him nothing but bad luck in his life.I want to tell him that I can't wait until he fails his drug test next month & fails miserably with every decision he has made. I know in my heart that this wouldn't do me any good.I just want him to feel bad about everything he has done to me.I heard that the opposite of love is indifference.I guess by me hating him,it means I still love him so,I don't want him to know I still love him.So I keep that in mind & that's why I have not texted him yet but...it's so hard! It's been 15 days of NC now & we broke up almost a month ago.Maybe he doesn't even care that we are not talking.Maybe he is relieved because he doesn't have to hear how much I'm hurting.I just need some wise words right now.Has anyone ever sent hate texts after being dumped?What's the worst that can happen? What do you think you would gain from this? It's not worth your time and he probably doesn't care, or would write you off as 'psycho'. Don't do it. This doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things. Also, keep your dignity. You don't want that stuff to be the last thing he remembers you by. And you will feel crappy later, I can almost promise you that. Keep the venting here; you will feel so much better.
Author dsw31 Posted April 17, 2012 Author Posted April 17, 2012 You guys are all so right! I won't text him.If I only have 1 shred of dignity left-it's going to be the fact that he has no idea what's going on with me.I may need some more reminders in the future but for now...I am glad that I haven't contacted him.Thanks again! 1
Zahara Posted April 17, 2012 Posted April 17, 2012 You've already endured 3 break-ups. He can contact you, and you'll probably be headed for a 4th breakup if you like eating breadcrumbs. He's doing you a huge favor, you just don't realize it yet. The only alternative is to stay away. You are partly responsible for allowing yourself to be led on, not once, twice but three times. Time to learn from your mistakes. 2
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