She said she lost feelings? Keep trying or no?

[toxin500]

SORRY FOR THE LENGTH ....well it started out like this: she came over my house one night (after dance auditions because i have her in dance class) because she said she wanted to talk so we talked that night and she ended up saying she likes me and i said the same thing back because i like her too. She told me how she gets jealous and stuff and i didnt even notice when she did so shes good at covering up and why she liked me which is because im sweet and funny and so on. well ever since after that we were like....idk how to say it because she said she didnt want to rush into the relationship because when you rush it doesnt turn out well she said so i guess we were talking or something, but by then we were already kissing and then that night we started holding hands and ended the night happy. Just saying this is my first time being close to having a girlfriend with all this kissing and holding hands. It went well until i started getting jealous and i started overthinking a lot. Also i didnt make the first move most of the time like she for example she always texted me first or went to hold my hand or to kiss me. I didnt want to seem to clingy by always doing it if i did and my pride also got in the way. :/ I did invite to take her out tho but she later on couldnt because of work; i also made her a card hand drawn with her favorite stuff and told her how i felt about her such as how blessed i am to be with her and stuff. Then i thought i couldve been rushing things saying that:/ sigh but After a period of time i decided to talk to her about it and ended up turning into an arguement because she said why did i keep it from her because a relationship consist of 2 people she said and why i wasnt honest with her and i guess trustworthy and i honestly didnt know what to say (she also knew i was overthinking stuff but she was just giving me time and waiting) and why didnt i go to her first (because i told her friend and asked for advice because i didnt want to ruin anything or lose her but now its even worse ) Then she said she didnt even feel like talking any more and just went with her friends then i just went with mines(it was during lunch). Ever since after that day it was just weird between me and her. I felt something was up because she said she wasnt mad at me but the situation. Now whenever we were together it was weird and not like before. In school i have her 5th hour every day in dance and i always sit next to her and enjoyed it now its odd. Its like after the argument she stopped doing each thing such as calling me babe or holding my hand and then the last thing kiss me. I was confused for a while because she didnt tell what she was thinking but she texted me but it didnt feel like the past texts you know? I really didnt know what to do next and maybe thought it was my turn to make the moves because i heard that she was waiting for me like she was putting in effort and getting nothing in return? she also posted a picture with words saying to grab and kiss her, say "i miss you" chase after her and maybe a rose but idk if that was towards me maybe someone else? Thats where i overthink and think that maybe she has lost feelings for me and is starting to like someone else.:/ i started to get a gut feeling and its not from a song either js but I dont know any of that info yet but after dance one day (since we also stay after school for dance) as i was walking to my friends car i went back to her and said i miss you and she said the same but i dont think she meant it the same way or maybe she was just saying it because i said it? to not make the situation awkward? We had a little talk there and she ended up saying that shes sorry for leaving me hanging all confused because her herself is confused too and i asked her are you happy then she said no then i said are you happy with me then she said yes and smiled but then my friend came up and took me home so the convo ended and then she ended up texting me later saying that shes sorry for that that i didnt deserve that nothing wrong with me has to do with you she said and said that we'll continue the convo the next day. Next day came and we didnt (she also didnt stay after school for dance because she had an appointment so maybe thats why we didnt continue? or she wanted me to bring it up? but i didnt want to bring it up during 5th hour or lunch because it would feel rushed and weird so after school wouldve felt better but yea and i didnt want to keep pressuring her into talking. So i decided to ask her the next day to wait for me after school by her car (i didnt say why though) and she said sure. Then we met and she said she knows why im there and its because of the talk and i asked her how she feels and that i want her to say what she really feels not what i want to hear and she just said......I think we're better off as friends. She said she lost the feelings idk why? She said she felt it in the dance room but then outside of it (she didnt finish the sentence) im guessing she didnt but if she didnt feel it outside of it then why would she do all that stuff? Like kiss me or hold my hand? She would comeover my house or we would go to the beach or the mall or out to eat and she did all of those stuff there? im confused. she said that she cant really handle or deal with a boyfriend right now and making him happy and that she is bad with relationships. I didnt believe that because we can always make it through together and she said that my next girlfriend would be a better one. I mean why would she say that? Is she trying to let me go in an easier way? im still confused and didnt really get a chance to speak at that moment i just said that ill miss our moments and all the stuff we did and that shes the only girl i want and i asked her wont you too? Then she just stayed quite. She said theres nothing really else left to say.She had to go to tutoring so i didnt want to hold her up so we just said bye but then i told her if theres anything im always there for her and she said that she'll take that into consideration......? :/ I didnt say why i acted like i did like why i didnt make the first move, my feelings towards her, or the jealousy stuff, like i have unsettled business? Words i feel like i should say. I feel like ive messed up and i just dont know what to do. Now in class its just awkward in 5th hour we barely talk or text or anything. Idk if she even thinks about me anymore or if she even cares anymore. I still do, i miss her a lot and her texts, her kisses, mainly everything and i guess i didnt really know what i had until she was gone? I said i didnt want to lose her and idk if i already did I feel like it didnt end right like there was more to happen like good stuff. She said all this stuff before such as she felt like i was the one and i could be different. I do want to be different and have kept going with what we've had but idk now? I dont want to be like her past relationships that said "i dont wanna lose you" then next thing you know they did. Idk if i did already sadly sigh like i want to keep fighting? i feel like there is still some kind of hope because she did stuff with me that didnt do with her past relationships such as PDA. I just dont know why she would lose feelings? Maybe because how i was? even tho she said nothing wrong with her has to do with me? Idk if shes having family problems or anything and she told me she was going to a funeral but idk if that was an excuse as well with her other problems to let me go easy? Im just really confused and keep overthinking. I still get jealous and idk if she does anymore. I cant really do NC because i mainly see her everyday in school and she my partner in mostly all the dances. We have a duet too. I still care for her and dont know if i should still tell her how i feel and sorry for the way i acted? She might already see the subject dead already thats why idk what to do!? She also has alot of guy friends so thats why i got jealous. Shes going to prom with her best guy friend (he has a gf already too) as just friends so that doesnt really worry me, but this other dude that used to be her ex is talking to her like he's liking most of her pictures (idk if that means anything) and i dont know if shes starting to like him again? I have so many unanswered questions and keep overthinking. One of her friends told me that she doesnt see anything in him because he seems like a party guy and doesnt look like he can hold a stable relationship? Like he doesnt seem like the right guy? idk man. She's Bi aswell and drinks too so i still care for what she does like i dont want her to do anything crazy you know? The ex also drinks and stuff Idk if i should keep trying like fight for her? or just let go? i feel like something went wrong that i can still fix? we can still fix and get though together? I just have this weird feeling inside and keeo asking why did this happen? why would she just lose feelings? maybe because im too sweet? maybe because i didnt give back effort? maybe her other problems? (idk if they were excuses tho) Im just confused and dont know what to do :/ Like i FEEL that theres more idk how to explain it. I dont know whats going through her head right now. I want to clear up this awkwardness. My friend said that maybe she just liked the partnership ship in dance and fell inlove with the dancer not person? idk how to explain it but maybe if i did my part i couldve changed it? I really need help please!? should i still tell her my stuff? :/ i feel like i could still fix this somehow, i mean like theres always a way? I always have memories of her popping up either from a song or from a a place we've been to together always reminds me of her :/ she cared A LOT before but I wonder if she still even does I want to be the difference . She's also been posting stuff such as "I'm not getting any sleep tonight" or "this feeling because all of this thinking" or "hate this feeling" idk if it was towards me and she was just preparing or it's her other problems?

Edited April 17, 2012 by toxin500

[january2011]

It's not the length that's the issue. It's the lack of paragraphs. If you return to this thread, please edit your post into paragraphs to make it easier to read.

 

A very superficial dip into your post suggests that something happened between you and a girl but you can't go NC because she's also your dance partner, you have a duet together and you see her every day for dance school. I would suggest that you go LC, don't make smalltalk, just focus on the dancing. Then the first opportunity you get, get a new partner and go NC.