Ok - Now he's just trying to mess with my head - And I say 'NO!"

[gobain]

I broke up with my boyfriend of 10 mos. a couple of weeks ago. If anyone has read my last post, you know that it certainly wasn't because I didn't love him but because he was in a really bad emotional place and, frankly, he was dragging me down with him.

 

In my guilt for abandoning him in his time of need, I wrote him a letter letting him know that I do love him and would be there for him if he should need someone. It made me feel better to do so, that's all I can say.

 

He called me on Monday from out-of-state while visiting a friend to thank me for the letter "it meant alot to me, so thank you for writing that", and that he'd be coming back probably the next day and "hopefully I'll get a chance to talk to you" before he leaves again on Saturday. He said some other nice stuff too.

 

Needless to say, I haven't heard from him again. I left him a short, polite message Wednesday night. He's doing the same thing he always did and leaving me until last. I don't know why I would expect it to be different now, but why even call me? Why continue to string me along after I've already made it clear that treatment like that doesn't fly?

 

I'll tell you one thing - it sure took care of that guilt problem I had.

 

So why I'm writing is this:

 

If someone hurts you - leave and don't look back. Do the no contact and stick to it, by God. Love isn't always enough. And if someone is stringing you along or causing you pain - Run, DO NOT WALK, to the nearest exit.

 

I wish I had never tried to make things right - they never would be - and I'll be damned if I'm going to let this feckless, emotional black hole of a man suck me back into his world of half-truths and half-heartedness.

 

So There.

[CurlyIam]

Hi, gobain

 

I am also guilty of being easily manipulated through feelings of guilt. I always look back and reanalize everything. I have the hardest of times getting over problems. I sometimes seem to be sucked in it.

 

So my decision is that instead of learning to move on faster, something that considering my case, I know I'm never gonna be able to do because I cannot give my heart but entirely, I have decided not to get into that kind of situation.

 

I have decided to stay out of the drama. Something like deciding not to have the disease, not focussing on the most efficient medicine, should I get sick.

 

 

 

I know it seems easier said then done, but I have the age and the maturity not to get into tumultuos relationships. To choose better. Then, if it goes wrong, it goes wrong, but at least I know I have listened to my instincts better....