BewitchedandBothered Posted April 16, 2012 Posted April 16, 2012 I also had a very similar breakup to BewitchedandBothered. I haven't broken NC to this day.Why should I even give the time of day to someone who dumped and verbally abused me by text. Then called me psycho for wanting answers as to why I was being dumped for no reason after a year. And then telling everyone that I was The psycho? Sorry but I wouldn't if my ex begged me. Exactly. why contact someone who devalued you. I miss the person he pretended to be in the beginning; that sweet fellow who lured me in, our late night online Scrabble games and conversations; so sweet...never knew what calamity awaited me. I am also the psycho, sinister, evil, a liar, deceiver and I also have 5 fake Facebook accounts, all male, designed to spy on him by friending his friends. He says he has proof of this and has told everyone he could think of, oh, I am also a cheater. All I could do was back away. I learned a huge thing, though, from this. When they do this, they are projecting. Everything they know they are, they turn it on someone else to make themselves look good. Lots of self-loathing there. He has my pity now; that's all he gets, LOL!!!
Reddice Posted April 16, 2012 Posted April 16, 2012 Luckily, I have not broken NC as of yet. I have learned from past experiences that when alcohol is involved, you become more emotional and will do things you'll regret later on. So... I have deleted her phone number, her text messages and basically everything which can give me any possibility to contact her. She is no longer on my messenger, nor on facebook, I just made her vanish. She dissapeared from the face of the earth as far as I'm concerned. I just won't allow any contact to happen and have taken every precaution to prevent it from happening if I ever feel weak. It's as simple as that. 1
Downtown Posted April 17, 2012 Posted April 17, 2012 I also had a very similar breakup to BewitchedandBothered.SugarKane, nobody can send you a PM because your mailbox is full.
jennisfora Posted April 17, 2012 Posted April 17, 2012 i wrote my ex a really nice message about understanding, and knowing that he is doing what he thinks best, yada yada yada, and he replied, saying the same drivel about not wanting to give me false hope, and not wanting to hurt me, but that he prefers being a lone wolf, doesnt want to date anyone, blah blah blah, so i sent him a simple reply saying, i have a lot on my mind, and i would appreciate it if you dont contact me anymore, if i want to be in contact ill let you know. wow, within moments, he sent 4 texts, tried calling me, then sent 4 more texts an hour later, i ignored them all. what i learned basically, this was more initiating from him since the first couple weeks after the breakup, but most of these texts he was actually angry, and pissed off at me? he said i wanted him to be the bad guy, and all this, even though my last message was extremely simple and didn't say any of that. but, what i learned, and it made me very sad, he has no interest in reconciling, and may not, but that the reason he suddenly reached out, is he wanted to be the one to put me in NC. he wanted to be in control of it, and the fact that i pulled the plug, upset him. because i rejected him this time. and, it may be petty, but, it felt good. i still miss him, i still wish things could be different, but im finally realizing that he doesn't want it. and, i can't change that. no amount of texts or calls is going to change that. the only thing that could change it, is time, and him. and i may change my mind by that time, who knows. but, i feel good being that now it feels like it is on my terms, not his. being dumped you feel so powerless, like something is done to you, and you just have to take it. now, i feel like i got my choice. i got my chance to say, no thank you. made me feel better.
immitable Posted April 17, 2012 Posted April 17, 2012 Exactly. why contact someone who devalued you. I miss the person he pretended to be in the beginning; that sweet fellow who lured me in, our late night online Scrabble games and conversations; so sweet...never knew what calamity awaited me. I am also the psycho, sinister, evil, a liar, deceiver and I also have 5 fake Facebook accounts, all male, designed to spy on him by friending his friends. He says he has proof of this and has told everyone he could think of, oh, I am also a cheater. All I could do was back away. I learned a huge thing, though, from this. When they do this, they are projecting. Everything they know they are, they turn it on someone else to make themselves look good. Lots of self-loathing there. He has my pity now; that's all he gets, LOL!!! Your ex sounds like sad person really, best thing you did was to back off. I can only imagine what blow to your personality this has done. I always knew my ex was manipulating and insecure too but if you love someone you try to ovelook these flaws (red flags). Keep your head up
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