jnd Posted April 14, 2012 Posted April 14, 2012 He wants to take a break...us still be together but not live in the same house for a little bit. I dont like the idea because I can't stand not knowing what he's doing (he's lied about what he's doing before while I'm home trying to sleep for work the next day, he says i'm controlling- that's our argument that we're trying to work through now). However, I'm trying to muster up the courage to leave for the weekend next weekend. It would be to go visit family 3 hours away, in a way (I'm hoping) it would be relaxing for me, and it'll help what he wants. My issue is, I don't know if I want to tell him I'm leaving. My reasoning is I don't want him to be all "good, she's gone, let's have a party at the house" or "i'm gonna go be free for the weekend". I guess I want to keep him on his toes and not know when I'll be back. My problem is, I have a parrot that lives with us. So I can't just up and leave, someone will have to take care of him (food, water, turn radio on when no one's home, etc). I was thinking of taking him to my mom's, but then the BF will know something's up if the bird's missing. I don't want to take him with me either. I was thinking of leaving a note simply saying "Take care of *Bird, please" or something so he knows i'm gone but doesn't know when I'll be back. Suggestions?
cerridwen Posted April 14, 2012 Posted April 14, 2012 He lies and is untrustworthy. You are understandably suspicious and on edge. You're having to resort to half-truths and game-playing, and even the parrot's not immune. What part did you want suggestions on?
BewitchedandBothered Posted April 14, 2012 Posted April 14, 2012 He wants to take a break...us still be together but not live in the same house for a little bit. I dont like the idea because I can't stand not knowing what he's doing (he's lied about what he's doing before while I'm home trying to sleep for work the next day, he says i'm controlling- that's our argument that we're trying to work through now). However, I'm trying to muster up the courage to leave for the weekend next weekend. It would be to go visit family 3 hours away, in a way (I'm hoping) it would be relaxing for me, and it'll help what he wants. My issue is, I don't know if I want to tell him I'm leaving. My reasoning is I don't want him to be all "good, she's gone, let's have a party at the house" or "i'm gonna go be free for the weekend". I guess I want to keep him on his toes and not know when I'll be back. My problem is, I have a parrot that lives with us. So I can't just up and leave, someone will have to take care of him (food, water, turn radio on when no one's home, etc). I was thinking of taking him to my mom's, but then the BF will know something's up if the bird's missing. I don't want to take him with me either. I was thinking of leaving a note simply saying "Take care of *Bird, please" or something so he knows i'm gone but doesn't know when I'll be back. Suggestions?You were lied to; what's to hold onto? I would leave the bird so that when you return, the bird can report to you what went on...All kidding aside, what do you want with someone you can't trust? It will always be in the back of your mind.
CaliBabe Posted April 14, 2012 Posted April 14, 2012 I would first find a place for the bird. Whether it's with a friend, family member or a pet hotel (they have those). But you really need to evaluate what is going on here. He seems very untrustworthy, how long do you want to keep living like this? Always having to look behind your back and being suspicious. A relationship should have mutual trust and you should feel 100% okay and content when leaving somewhere. This is a big problem. See how you feel on this mini vacation, if you feel better, leave him. 1
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