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Women are funny...you start dating one, and the others come out of the woodworks

singlelife

By singlelife
in Dating

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ThaWholigan Established Member

ThaWholigan

Posted
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From a strokes perspective, the guy might believe he's something hot. But if you consider all the angles and reasons, it's no better a place than any other beyond the sole perspective of getting laid. And even getting laid gets old after the guy matures enough to realize that he's filling the gaping hole within him, with false intimacy and external validation.

Maybe so, but for some guys, it's merely a start a.k.a. a foot in the door. That's my perspective on it. I'd imagine that for me, just getting laid would get old after a while, but considering I've never actually been laid, I won't know until I have. Hence why I would view it the way I have.

 

That being said, whether it's just to get laid or simply to have dates with a view to getting into a relationship, it's still better to have options in my honest opinion. I could be wrong........but I don't think so (Monk :laugh:)

threebyfate Established Member

threebyfate

Posted
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Even if only 10 or 15% are it's still significant enough to make a difference.
Odds are against you that you'll find someone emotionally healthy within the purportedly significant bunch.

 

Also consider another angle. If her breasts can a-flutter with one, she can a-flutter easily with another. GIG it up and up and up.

namenottaken Member

namenottaken

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I have a theory on this (I’ve said it before), because it happens to me as well.

 

When I’m in a relationship I’m happier, I smile more and I’m all around friendlier because of it. What’s not to like about a happy person? People don’t necessarily know you are in a relationship, but they notice your ‘happy’ personality and find that to be attractive and more approachable.

 

For those that encounter someone who goes after them, knowing they are taken, why would you want them anyway? Clearly they have no boundaries and will have none with you. Those are the ones I don’t hesitate being rude with, and I don’t have a single regret about it.

fortyninethousand322 Established Member

fortyninethousand322

Posted
Posted
Odds are against you that you'll find someone emotionally healthy within the purportedly significant bunch.

 

Also consider another angle. If her breasts can a-flutter with one, she can a-flutter easily with another. GIG it up and up and up.

 

True, but it beats being in my shoes. I'd gladly trade places with someone who had a girl "love him and leave him" so to speak.

Kamille Established Member

Kamille

Posted
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I agree with Namenottaken and even read some psych studies that support this.

 

There's two links to it: How we behave when we're happy and how others respond to it.

 

Whether man or woman, when we're in the "in love" phase, we radiate a positive easy-going energy. We're likely less tense, less awkward around others, less calculating and more in the moment.

 

Other people respond to that energy. Hence, suddenly, they come out of the woodworks.

 

No evil under-pinnings. Just humans being naturally attracted to happy humans. All part of the hit and miss of dating.

Badsingularity Established Member

Badsingularity

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Good lord! Have you been reading romance novels? :p

 

Trust me, we're not all breasts a-fluttering...

 

 

I am only stating what I myself have witnessed and experienced too many times to count. It is a subconcious response, so, more often then not the women don't even know why they are more attracted to taken men and also don't realize that the very fact that he is taken or has women around makes him more attractive to them.

 

It's ok. It's completely normal.:)

ThaWholigan Established Member

ThaWholigan

Posted
Posted
I agree with Namenottaken and even read some psych studies that support this.

 

There's two links to it: How we behave when we're happy and how others respond to it.

 

Whether man or woman, when we're in the "in love" phase, we radiate a positive easy-going energy. We're likely less tense, less awkward around others, less calculating and more in the moment.

 

Other people respond to that energy. Hence, suddenly, they come out of the woodworks.

 

No evil under-pinnings. Just humans being naturally attracted to happy humans. All part of the hit and miss of dating.

Which leads me to my other theory, that generally having a life that one is happy with in other areas can actually help in attracting women, especially if you have an attractive lifestyle. I'm moderately happy with being single, even though I have had more horny days this week than usual :laugh:.

  • Like 1
threebyfate Established Member

threebyfate

Posted
Posted
Maybe so, but for some guys, it's merely a start a.k.a. a foot in the door. That's my perspective on it. I'd imagine that for me, just getting laid would get old after a while, but considering I've never actually been laid, I won't know until I have. Hence why I would view it the way I have.

 

That being said, whether it's just to get laid or simply to have dates with a view to getting into a relationship, it's still better to have options in my honest opinion. I could be wrong........but I don't think so (Monk :laugh:)

Because we're being honest with each other and speaking from non-emotional positions, let me share my experiences.

 

This isn't intended to brag so don't take it this way. I've always had options but it made me cynical for a number of years. When you're viewed as a thing to acquire, it's demeaning since there are no assurances that the other individual sees beyond the superficial. Perhaps for some that's enough. But not for some of us who want to share healthy, loving relationships that aren't based on the superficial. It becomes an ache within you, that you'll never find someone who appreciates you from the inside out.

 

But then, my husband came along. He really loves me as I am, not just the shell of me or what I do or can do for him. Now THAT's positively meaningful and beyond inspiring. Everything else is irrelevant! :love:

Badsingularity Established Member

Badsingularity

Posted
Posted

 

But then, my husband came along. He really loves me as I am, not just the shell of me or what I do or can do for him. Now THAT's positively meaningful and beyond inspiring. Everything else is irrelevant! :love:

 

Good for you.:cool: I do believe that it is hard for women to find the type of man that can give them a relationship like this.

threebyfate Established Member

threebyfate

Posted
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Good for you.:cool: I do believe that it is hard for women to find the type of man that can give them a relationship like this.
Maybe, maybe not. But superficiality does appear to reign supreme in many relationships.

 

The male equivalent of this would be financially secure men who appear to have options but it's nothing more than women looking for a cash bull.

Jody005 Established Member

Jody005

Posted
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My ex gf called and wants to give it another try, and then every girl I been flirting with this year started hitting me up on fb wanting to hang and texting. I think girls get jealous off each other and will even give men sex just to be on top even if they don't really like a dude. It's funny. And obviously a girl can act like she doesn't like you and ignore you but really want to date you. You cannot judge a woman by how she acts at all. Lol.

 

Its true its like when your on a train and one person suddenly swings their head round to look at something everyone swings their head and looks to see whats so interesting. Exes will usually come out of the woodwork when they see you with someone new and you see it with celebrities...have you ever heard of Dean Gaffney?? He got loads of hot blondes after scoring with one hot blonde! Make her sweat!

ThaWholigan Established Member

ThaWholigan

Posted
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Its true its like when your on a train and one person suddenly swings their head round to look at something everyone swings their head and looks to see whats so interesting. Exes will usually come out of the woodwork when they see you with someone new and you see it with celebrities...have you ever heard of Dean Gaffney?? He got loads of hot blondes after scoring with one hot blonde! Make her sweat!

LMAO Robbie from Eastenders :D

 

I love the fact that he gets girls, he sure isn't a looker :laugh:

Pyro Established Member

Pyro

Posted
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This definitely does not apply to every guy. Ever since my marriage I have not had any women try to approach me.

 

(If they did then I didn't realize it or wasn't paying enough attention to care)

dasein Established Member

dasein

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Pussy smells pussy

 

Rationalize til the cows come home, this is pretty much it based on my experience of the phenomena. A man who is recently or currently selected is simply a more attractive prospect. Has nothing to do with female security or lack thereof, character traits, etc. Have gotten the response from women in all walks of life in all manner and shape of involvement. I don't think there's anything at all "wrong" with women who respond in this way, just a given reality men need to understand and exploit in the same way they exploit high heels and shaping/pushup bras to attract us.

Kamille Established Member

Kamille

Posted
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. I don't think there's anything at all "wrong" with women who respond in this way, just a given reality men need to understand and exploit in the same way they exploit high heels and shaping/pushup bras to attract us.

 

 

You feel exploited by push up bras? Try wearing one. Better yet, try wearing high heels.

  • Like 2
threebyfate Established Member

threebyfate

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You feel exploited by push up bras? Try wearing one. Better yet, try wearing high heels.
:lmao:

 

Okay, I burst out laughing!

  • Like 1
dasein Established Member

dasein

Posted
Posted
You feel exploited by push up bras? Try wearing one. Better yet, try wearing high heels.

 

Appreciate the humor attempt, but where did I say anything about "me" feeling exploited?

 

There are other meanings of the word "exploit" than one finds in freshman dorm room discussions.

Kamille Established Member

Kamille

Posted
Posted
Appreciate the humor attempt, but where did I say anything about "me" feeling exploited?

 

There are other meanings of the word "exploit" than one finds in freshman dorm room discussions.

 

Oh Dasein, I grant you the last word on the semantics of exploit, since I really don't care about winning this insanely futile argument.

dasein Established Member

dasein

Posted
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There wasn't really an "argument" either, just another failed joke at my supposed expense and the ensuing cymbal banging exercise on LS. Cheecheechee!

 

 

Now THAT's funny!

Kamille Established Member

Kamille

Posted
Posted
There wasn't really an "argument" either, just another failed joke at my supposed expense and the ensuing cymbal banging exercise on LS. Cheecheechee!

 

 

Now THAT's funny!

 

 

:confused:

 

Are you flirting with me?

 

:p

g450 Established Member

g450

Posted
Posted

Well here is my two cents:

 

Started hanging out at a club after divorce. Could not get the time of day from most women. Honestly though, I think women could sense that I was hurting and not in a good spot to date.

 

Found my Fiancee there and started dating her. Right after we were together I had a lady want to dance with me and asked me right in front of my GF. First time in my entire life this happened. She probably thought I was safe as she thought we were married so this most often is the case. Women feel safer when they know they have nothing to worry about so they may actually resort to flirting with you because they know there are no repercusions. You are their practice flirt. Hell even my future niece flirts with me and I am twice her age almost. It's all in fun.

 

However, there was a time when me and my girl had a falling out over her XH and I was single again for about two weeks. I can tell you that I only went to that club one time during that period and at least two women there that were regulars were all over me. And I guarantee you that I knew exactly what their intentions were. So yes I guess being seen with a woman makes a man more attractive to other women. That's a given.

 

For the record though, I did not do anything during that time and we got back together two weeks later. I have always been the faithful fool and probably always will be. It was a nice feeling to have a woman have that kind of interest in me though.

sLiPpeTh Member

sLiPpeTh

Posted
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Women do not know what they want; until they see what another woman has. :laugh:

DjinnAgain Established Member

DjinnAgain

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Women get the same thing when they enter a relationship.

 

I'm inclined to believe it has to do with confidence and not caring and just being a full person not a person looking...

Pyro Established Member

Pyro

Posted
Posted

I'm inclined to believe it has to do with confidence and not caring and just being a full person not a person looking...

 

good explanation. I like it.

 

This can apply to both genders.

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