OhHey Posted April 12, 2012 Posted April 12, 2012 (edited) Not to many things aggravate me in life:laugh::laugh:LMAO(humor) One of the most annoying things people do is drill about why I'm not in a relationship, why don't you date, don't you get lonely, when are you going to have a child, EVERYONE gets married, you just have too:rolleyes: They look at you all googly eyed and shocked....I even got asked if I am gay at my old job, because I simply wasn't into the stupid dating every weekend or getting a whore on Friday nights BS:rolleyes: I answer back like "Well to the few who do develop a true relationship, great, but for me I don't want to put myself through the whole "PITA, do you love me, cheating, drama, break-up, depression over break-up, must get several OKCupid profiles and date at least twice a week or I am nothing......Bull****. I'm simply not interested in all of that, I don't want kids I like my freedom, I want to ride my bicycle at 2 AM in the morning just to ride to Wal-Mart and get a Movie and some chips, not answering for it. I want to race cars, spend 10 hours a day on forums, fart in the tub and leave the toilet paper roll empty and never wonder if my GF is cheating on me! I basically don't give two ounces of crap to put myself through the muck and heart ache of dating or relationships....I just don't want to take the risk, IT SCARES ME!! Why can't people accept this is a person's choice and leave it alone? People think I am weird or gay, because I don't date:rolleyes: Is it in the holy grail that every person must date and be in a relationship or you will go to hell? Now, I love it when a couple get a great relationship...that is great and it brings me a smile and I get envious of that....it would be a great thing if it actually worked. I'm just not willing to take a chance and I am now 100% content with my choice. In conclusion, A relationship would be great if it lasted a lifetime. I'm not willing to waste my time for seven years just to get uber heart-break when it all goes bad. I would never be able to start over, it would hurt way to much. It sure would be great to be respected for my decision and not looked at as some strange anomaly from a distant world. Thanks for reading another EOTW, incoherent thread. Edited April 12, 2012 by OhHey 1
FitChick Posted April 12, 2012 Posted April 12, 2012 My asexual cousin told me about a forum for asexuals, so you might look for it. It was the first time I'd heard of the phenomenon. Nothing wrong with being platonic friends with members of the opposite sex who are also asexual.
Lobouspo Posted April 13, 2012 Posted April 13, 2012 My asexual cousin told me about a forum for asexuals, so you might look for it. It was the first time I'd heard of the phenomenon. Nothing wrong with being platonic friends with members of the opposite sex who are also asexual. The OP didn't say anything about being sexual. He just said he likes his singleness, and does not want subject himself right now to the dating/ relationship meat grinder 1
Star Gazer Posted April 13, 2012 Posted April 13, 2012 OP, try being a woman over 30 getting her nails done by an overly nosy Vietnamese manicurist who interrogates you over the bareness of your left ring finger! 3
Author OhHey Posted April 13, 2012 Author Posted April 13, 2012 (edited) OP, try being a woman over 30 getting her nails done by an overly nosy Vietnamese manicurist who interrogates you over the bareness of your left ring finger! Who cares, S_G:p (let her drill you all day and laugh) I say live free and if the relationship is true and happens, go for it. I have nothing against people wanting to be in a relationship and I guess I appear to be holier-than-thou with this thread, but I'm not trying to be. I simply do not want to get involved, take a chance on pure hell relationships can bring and have people think I am really wacked out not wanting a relationship....at least not actively pursuing one. I'm actually really stoked I am writing about this again and having the feelings I had years ago about relationships. Heh, in 2007(when I came to LS) I experienced my first taste of true love for another and it was a strange, exciting and nice feeling. Back then I actually craved nothing but to be intimate with a girl and it killed me hard, because that girl was not available(we never met) I also experienced(how stupid it may be being an online break-up and all) my first taste of relationship gone wrong... I don't want to feel that again....it was the worst feeling in my life and the loneliness that ensued after.... was to much for words and left we wondering.. How do people do it?... P.S.(Disclaimer) "that girl" I was referring to was no one from LS...just to clear any questions up. Edited April 13, 2012 by OhHey
Jane2011 Posted April 13, 2012 Posted April 13, 2012 OP, try being a woman over 30 getting her nails done by an overly nosy Vietnamese manicurist who interrogates you over the bareness of your left ring finger! I'm Vietnamese, which means my mother and all her friends are these types of nosy/blunt/tactless Vietnamese women. When I was 15, I gained a bunch of weight because I was just at that age where I stopped being a skinny girl. One of my mom's friends was like, "What happened? You got fat." Or maybe it was something like, "Why are you fat now?" They're so mean... Also, my dentist is a Vietnamese man whose wife is the receptionist at his office. They're always like, "Are you married yet?" Vietnamese people need to leave people alone and let them be fat and unmarried without comment! 1
Author OhHey Posted April 13, 2012 Author Posted April 13, 2012 Just to let the ones in here looking for love and all that....I respect you all for it and all of ya do have more strength than me. I can 100% say that it all scares me and I have no bravery towards it at all.
Author OhHey Posted April 13, 2012 Author Posted April 13, 2012 They're always like, "Are you married yet?" That sort of thing erks me. No not married..not gonna be. Ohhh I must be some sort of abomination from f'cked up land then, in their eyes... ERRRR!
Author OhHey Posted April 13, 2012 Author Posted April 13, 2012 My asexual cousin told me about a forum for asexuals, so you might look for it. It was the first time I'd heard of the phenomenon. Nothing wrong with being platonic friends with members of the opposite sex who are also asexual. Oh I love sex and everything about it.... I just don't want to be in a long term relationship and all the responsibility that goes with it...I don't want it. If I do want it, I am not going to rule my life trying to find "The One" and all the BS that goes with it. I'll just "let it happen" if it presents itself someday. Hell with it, if I am 67 and just got married, at least I won't die alone...until then I am happy living free and spirited(lmao) I had a school friend that killed himself when he caught his wife of seven years cheating...She cheated for five of those years. He couldn't take it and shot himself. See....if something like that happened to me in a relationship....I'd be afraif of doing the same....I'm a very emotional type(I guess) I'd be afraid of not being able to handle a crisis like that.. I admit I am scared of it, don't want to take the chance and better off to not get involved with it. As for sex....there are ways to handle that in a good manor where everyone comes out of it happy. It's good enough for me.
Author OhHey Posted April 13, 2012 Author Posted April 13, 2012 I haven't totally ruled out a relationship, like I say, I won't actively or religiously go out of my way to pursue one. I also don't care what people think Of my choice, beit they think I am selfish, lazy or whatever..I don't care. Now if one day this girl and I just happen to click and it just feels really amazing....well..... I may just let it ride...who knows, but it won't be anything I push. To me this whole relationship and dating arena looks like a "Mega sale madness" meaning that everyone goes out of their way, pushing through the muck and BS to get someone to be with and forgetting what life is all about in the process just to think they have found peace and tranquility. People are just to damn hard on themselves and it sucks to see how hurt they get over it all. These forums attest to it. I am just not going to push it to be in a relationship, but if by some amazing reason it happens, I'll let it happen unpushed and naturally. On the opposite though...it must be one amazing thing to have someone in your life that just tickles your soul every time you're near them, sitting on the rocks near twilight overlooking the river, kissing/banging. A partner to ride bikes with and go camping....going to the store.....all of that.... It must be amazing to have a soulmate....a true soulmate. but right now....I am perfectly content with my situation, although natural human instinct and cravings do creep up and are hard to resist, but I am learning to cope with that. Of course loneliness ensues sometimes, but it is more short lived these days.
dasein Posted April 13, 2012 Posted April 13, 2012 Marriage was a survivial necessity just a short time ago. The DOL was necessary, children were necessary. Now, due to both good and bad reasons, marriage isn't necessary, and IMO it's the single worst life decision a man who doesn't want children can make. A no brainer to avoid. If you don't absolutely have to have children, getting married is like drinking drano, bad idea. Women who quiz you about it are resentful and men who quiz you about it are insanely jealous of you generally.
Author OhHey Posted April 13, 2012 Author Posted April 13, 2012 Women who quiz you about it are resentful and men who quiz you about it are insanely jealous of you generally. In some cases I guess I agree with that. At my old job my friend was going through a break-up....Apparently after 5 years or so with that girl, she decided she wanted to pursue a career in law enforcement and figured he wasn't going to grow up....So she left him. For weeks he would go downstairs to argue on the phone to her and friends about it..... I remember thinking....."screw that crap" lmao. And he comes to me asking why I don't date and all that..... Fantastic.
freestyle Posted April 13, 2012 Posted April 13, 2012 I see nothing wrong with choosing to remain single, if that's what works for you. I went through a time period of that myself, too, years ago. I was okay with it. Of course--- no sooner did I come to a level acceptance of it, and I met my significant other....(when I wasn't looking at all..) I do remember getting henpecked over it---it WAS annoying.
Author OhHey Posted April 13, 2012 Author Posted April 13, 2012 Of course--- no sooner did I come to a level acceptance of it, and I met my significant other....(when I wasn't looking at all..) That's it, right there. That's all I am looking at and it makes the pressure and anxiety of seeking out relationships a lot more bearable and less hurtful while enjoying your life as is. People these days need to let go, enjoy life and put less pressure on themselves to be hitched. It's not necessary these days as it was years and years ago when big families were key to work the land and all that..I agree with the poster who said that.
freestyle Posted April 13, 2012 Posted April 13, 2012 I strongly believe that it's important to be comfortable in one's own skin, as an individual---first, too. To be able to be happy, without depending on someone else for one's happiness. When a person can achieve that---that's when they have the most to offer to a relationship. The tricky part is to not lose sight of that perspective, if you do end up in a relationship.
Star Gazer Posted April 13, 2012 Posted April 13, 2012 I'm Vietnamese, which means my mother and all her friends are these types of nosy/blunt/tactless Vietnamese women. I'm glad I didn't offend you (doesn't sound like I did), but honestly, I had to stop going to this one shop because the gal I always saw was up in my business all. the. effing. time. "Why you no married? What wrong with you? Why you so picky? Many men marry you. Pick one and have the baby."
El Brujo Posted April 13, 2012 Posted April 13, 2012 There are a few guys I know who are otherwise pretty cool, except that they ride me and try to talk me into doing the stud thing like I'm driving a race car in an international grand prix. Personally, I'm glad I'm over that whole desire-for-companionship thing.
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