men and love!

[mogs]

hi

I have just split with my boyf of a year and half. we were very different, i told him months ago that i loved him and he jumped! not the expected response! we fell asleep on arugment an the next day he said how much he cared for me blah blah blah. showed me in everyway that he loved me but didnt say it! we split a month ago, him, said he didnt love me, got back a week later him in a panic saying he'd made the biggest mistake off his life, wanted me in his future..still no sign of those words though! then last week dumped me again!! said he doesnt love me..cares for me..and everything else was perfect in everyway he just didnt feel the spark! i'm just wondering how a fella can spend that long with somone and for it to be so good if he didnt love them! i thought maybe he just couldnt say it as he is not the most emotional or tactile person! i'm just so confused.. going to just give him time. he has exams around the corner that he is very stressed over..so not contacting him any more!! have gone through the crazy stage! and now just resolved myself to it i guess! just wondering what everyone else thought!!!

[january2011]

It could be a combination of stress over his exams, the realisation that he doesn't feel the same way, incompatible relationship goals, someone else, etc.

 

Sometimes the dumper doesn't even know the 'real' reason - the relationship just doesn't feel right (anymore).

 

It's still very fresh and I can imagine that your emotions are all over the place. You're looking for answers, but right now, I don't think he's in a position to give them to you. He may never be.

 

Focus on self-care and go NC, that's really all you can do right now. And if the thoughts and emotions get too much, start a journal (online or offline) or talk about it here.

[mogs]

thanks for that thats what he did say, he just didn't feel it. definitely NC and look after myself for a while!

this is a great site and has been a great help