12yearsin Posted April 11, 2012 Posted April 11, 2012 Ok here is my story. I was seeing someone for about 6 months. We were actually pretty inseparable and the were going pretty great. We were keeping things quite about us but people caught in really quickly, i guess our feelings for one another were realy obvious, lol. Than he started to kinda have a hard time with some me stuff like his parent getting really sick, stuff like that. Of course he started to get distance. Out of what seems like no where to me he says he has so much going on and it's a really bad time for a relationship. We are still forced to see each their everyday because we work together. Since than he has not looked like e happiest guy in the world. I catch him staring at me a lot. He even mentioned beng upset because I stopped hangin' out with him at work (I figured LC was best). My problem I do not want to stop seeng him and would love to reconcile. What are the chances?
BewitchedandBothered Posted April 12, 2012 Posted April 12, 2012 Ok here is my story. I was seeing someone for about 6 months. We were actually pretty inseparable and the were going pretty great. We were keeping things quite about us but people caught in really quickly, i guess our feelings for one another were realy obvious, lol. Than he started to kinda have a hard time with some me stuff like his parent getting really sick, stuff like that. Of course he started to get distance. Out of what seems like no where to me he says he has so much going on and it's a really bad time for a relationship. We are still forced to see each their everyday because we work together. Since than he has not looked like e happiest guy in the world. I catch him staring at me a lot. He even mentioned beng upset because I stopped hangin' out with him at work (I figured LC was best). My problem I do not want to stop seeng him and would love to reconcile. What are the chances? You were inseparable because you were only together 6 months. Of course things were going great; maybe it was too much too soon. Just because his parent became ill is no excuse for him to distance from you if he cares. I always thought that something like that would draw people closer. Sounds like he's using stuff as an excuse. Why did you keep it a secret that you were together? Makes no sense to me. He distanced himself from you and then laments hanging together at work? I'm not quite following what went wrong here...
Author 12yearsin Posted April 12, 2012 Author Posted April 12, 2012 I'm not sure what went wrng either. We were keeping it quiet because we work together no but that did not work, lol. A parent being terminally isn't he best reason to end things but it's just what he said. I kinda just surprised at the ending and if there is any hope to recoup. Or does to much to soon reuin it?
BewitchedandBothered Posted April 12, 2012 Posted April 12, 2012 I'm not sure what went wrng either. We were keeping it quiet because we work together no but that did not work, lol. A parent being terminally isn't he best reason to end things but it's just what he said. I kinda just surprised at the ending and if there is any hope to recoup. Or does to much to soon reuin it? A relationship that catches fire quickly will fizzle out quickly. Maybe it was more of a lust thing; attraction and the thrill is gone. Is he taking care of this parent? Wondering if he lives at home and has to watch her/him get sicker. Still wouldn't understand why he wouldn't lean on you--that is the time when he would need a friend for sure. Open lines of communication. Let him know that if he needs you, you are there, if that's how you feel, of course. That being said, if you are up for it, take you time.
Author 12yearsin Posted April 12, 2012 Author Posted April 12, 2012 He does have to take care of both parents, one that is terminal and one that hasn't been well all along. I offered to be there so he does know. I guess immthrown off too because he's still trying to communicate and still seems interested. I hate dating : (. All I could do is let go. 1
BewitchedandBothered Posted April 12, 2012 Posted April 12, 2012 He does have to take care of both parents, one that is terminal and one that hasn't been well all along. I offered to be there so he does know. I guess immthrown off too because he's still trying to communicate and still seems interested. I hate dating : (. All I could do is let go. Keep him as a friend; this is too heavy for anything deeper right now; you've only been together 6 months and now he's laying all this on you? Can you transfer to another area?
Mr Scorpio Posted April 12, 2012 Posted April 12, 2012 I wouldn't necessarily say that too much too soon ruins it as much as it creates an illusion of something that may not have really been there. Most any relationship starts off well: things are new and exciting, you wake up happy, you call each other non-stop. However, over time, things can become stale. Now, it doesn't sound as though that was the case here. Rather, your ex got hit with some serious drama in his life. It seems as though he felt/decided that your relationship wasn't one in which he could go for support. Is it possible that you could reconcile when his issues with his family simmer down? Sure. It is probable? Hard to say. Like B&B said, let him know that you are available if he needs it and give him some space. That being said, if it were me, I'd be leaning on my partner like there was no tomorrow. 1
BewitchedandBothered Posted April 12, 2012 Posted April 12, 2012 I wouldn't necessarily say that too much too soon ruins it as much as it creates an illusion of something that may not have really been there. Most any relationship starts off well: things are new and exciting, you wake up happy, you call each other non-stop. However, over time, things can become stale. Now, it doesn't sound as though that was the case here. Rather, your ex got hit with some serious drama in his life. It seems as though he felt/decided that your relationship wasn't one in which he could go for support. Is it possible that you could reconcile when his issues with his family simmer down? Sure. It is probable? Hard to say. Like B&B said, let him know that you are available if he needs it and give him some space. That being said, if it were me, I'd be leaning on my partner like there was no tomorrow. I completely agree.
Author 12yearsin Posted April 12, 2012 Author Posted April 12, 2012 I can't transfer. I can only make some distance. Just surprised and very disappointed by his choice. What I feel for him is real, to bad it's one sided.
BewitchedandBothered Posted April 12, 2012 Posted April 12, 2012 I can't transfer. I can only make some distance. Just surprised and very disappointed by his choice. What I feel for him is real, to bad it's one sided. The fact that one parent is terminally ill and the other isn't doing so well is a huge weight for him to bear. He's probably not thinking much of dating right now. 1
Author 12yearsin Posted April 12, 2012 Author Posted April 12, 2012 I can't transfer. I can only make some distance. Just surprised and very disappointed by his choice. What I feel for him is real, to bad it's one sided.
Author 12yearsin Posted April 12, 2012 Author Posted April 12, 2012 So someone at work let it slip that he's planning a surprise birthday party for my upcoming birthday. I'm excited and that's so nice but doesn't feel like something an "ex" should be doing.
BewitchedandBothered Posted April 12, 2012 Posted April 12, 2012 So someone at work let it slip that he's planning a surprise birthday party for my upcoming birthday. I'm excited and that's so nice but doesn't feel like something an "ex" should be doing. No, but it's something a friend would do for a friend.
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