How did the myth come about that women arent as visual or into looks as men are?

[Imported]

To be honest, I don't think anyone should be with someone they find unattractive - even if they're "ugly".

 

There are "leagues" for attractiveness. Most people learn where they fall on that scale eventually and learn to value other things about a person to increase their attractiveness in their minds so that they can have a happy life with people that would be considered low on that scale. It'll be a case of sour grapes sometimes where they'll believe, "I coulda got that girl if I really wanted, but I am not a jerk that only uses women and can't treat them that way and all these hot girls only want jerks because they are all screwed up". Or some other lame-o excuse. Eventually they either settle, blow all their money on hookers or be foreveralone.

[mesmerized]

And you can't complain when you get "used" for sex.

 

How are these two even related? lol

 

And FYI, I never thought I was used for sex and don't think I'll ever feel that way in any consensual situation. I'm an adult and not young and immature and I take responsibility for my actions and don't confuse sex with love or other things.

[somedude81]

How are these two even related? lol

 

And FYI, I never thought I was used for sex and don't think I'll ever feel that way in any consensual situation. I'm an adult and not young and immature and I take responsibility for my actions and don't confuse sex with love or other things.

Because it's a common complaint and especially by women who are with men who are out of their league.

 

Though it's good that you take responsibility for your actions.

[mesmerized]

I think it's just as much about women never listing "looks" at the top of their mile long criteria lists, yet selecting on looks to the same extent men do, as it is about men deluding themselves. We hear "he's so funny, smart, blablabla" as "he's HOT, and so I will attribute all these other 'substantial' qualities to him despite that there's not much indication he really has them." After enough of this, and being selected unduly on looks ourselves v other features, we realize that any claims that women are more into substantial qualities than men is just more anti male propaganda.

 

Maybe. I've rarely heard from women that looks doesn't matter. But perhaps they don't feel the need to lie to me.

[dasein]

Maybe. I've rarely heard from women that looks doesn't matter.

 

Yeah well, I didn't post anything about women saying "looks doesn't matter," but rather claiming that there are other qualities more important than looks to them and then conducting their actual social life in a contradictory way.

 

But perhaps they don't feel the need to lie to me.

 

The ones who claim "looks aren't as important as blablabla" then act otherwise are mostly lying to themselves, not your or me.

[AD1980]

There are "leagues" for attractiveness. Most people learn where they fall on that scale eventually and learn to value other things about a person to increase their attractiveness in their minds so that they can have a happy life with people that would be considered low on that scale. It'll be a case of sour grapes sometimes where they'll believe, "I coulda got that girl if I really wanted, but I am not a jerk that only uses women and can't treat them that way and all these hot girls only want jerks because they are all screwed up". Or some other lame-o excuse. Eventually they either settle, blow all their money on hookers or be foreveralone.

 

ehh im 31 and never been in a relatinshiop and id still rather be alone then with somebody i have no attraction to at all physically it just wouldnt work for me

[mesmerized]

The ones who claim "looks aren't as important as blablabla" then act otherwise are mostly lying to themselves, not your or me.

 

This is probably true. A lot of women unfortunately have this great talent in lying to themselves and it always ends up getting them in trouble. But also women tend to just say this to men to shut them up from complaining.

[AD1980]

Women are so picky about looks, sometimes I feel nothing else matters except that.

 

You can get to know a woman equal in looks to you, share a lot of personality traits and have great conversations, and that woman will still have the nerve to say 'not my type'.

 

Then you can find a woman who has absolutely nothing in common with you, asymmetrical conversation, and is uglier than you, and you will be her long lost love because to her you look like so and so movie star.

 

Climbing up the ladder in looks and status is what women are genetically ingrained to do. Everyone talks about the imaginary fat guy or ugly guy who is lusting after attractive women, yeah they exist, but it's much more common for unattractive women to lust after more attractive men and actually try to get them to go out or become "Friends with benefits".

 

Probably because women can get sex from a man on a higher level then they are on the looks scale.

 

Usually its a pump and dump but the women tries to trap the guy into a relationship using sex which usually doesnt work but over inflates the ego of the women who then thinks shes above guys in her actual league

[mesmerized]

I don't know if you guys saw that show "the millionaire matchmaker". I loved when she got more female clients. The male clients were usually after the youngest and hottest women. The female clients weren't all that different except they seemed to be never happy with any of the guys she chose for them lol My favorite episode was this obese millionaire girl who chose the hottest guy who was a plumber. She told him she would buy him cars etc and was constantly complimenting the guy on his looks and trying to be physical with him. It was hilarious.

[Woggle]

I don't know if you guys saw that show "the millionaire matchmaker". I loved when she got more female clients. The male clients were usually after the youngest and hottest women. The female clients weren't all that different except they seemed to be never happy with any of the guys she chose for them lol My favorite episode was this obese millionaire girl who chose the hottest guy who was a plumber. She told him she would buy him cars etc and was constantly complimenting the guy on his looks. It was hilarious.

 

It sounds like that guy would have it made. You have a hit woman buying you stuff and if things go south you don't owe and in fact she might owe you. That whole show is dumb anyway. Her assistant to me was the hottest woman on that show but then again I am into alternative look. I am not into living barbie dolls.