unodos1011 Posted April 9, 2012 Posted April 9, 2012 R has been a bitch since I found out about WHs A. We have our amazing highs and horrible lows, on top of it I got pregnant during our bout of HB. Well to the point, we're 6 months out, he seems to be disgusted with the A and his actions and he tells me how much he hates MOW now. A few weeks ago I created a fake email account using her initials and sent him a blank message. He called me right away to let me know it may have been her and proceeded to go on a rant about what a POS she is trying to weasel her way back in knowing that I'm pregnant again (I was pregnant during the A too). Well last night I sent another email from the account, this time "fishing" but he replied and deleted it without telling me about it. Here's my email: Hey I'm sorry about the last email I just want to talk to you but I'm so nervous!! You have been on my mind so much but I didn't know if you would tell *BS* and so I waited, since I've not heard anything I hope you didn't! I'm sure you hate me but I just wonder if you're okay?! I wonder if you think of me?. Everything just changed so fast. I know it had to happen but everything is so messed up! We didn't really get to say goodbye and I'm home now, I don't want to come back to Cali there are just too many memories and some days I can hardly stand it! I thought we would always be friends at least. I just need to know if you're happy, if you ever think of me, if you ever wonder "what if". If I'm right and you do hate me, you don't have to respond just PLEASE delete this and pretend I never sent it! If there is any part of you that thinks one day we can be together then I will hang on to that but I just need to know if I can close this chapter of my life and move forward....if that's what you want from me. Here's his response: Wait you're all alone you left? I'm confused I heard you slept with a couple of people the cops are talking I just don't know what to think of you to be honest, I don't trust much of anything anymore I don't even know who you are Sooooo. What do u make of this???
bentnotbroken Posted April 9, 2012 Posted April 9, 2012 What do you make of it? He broke NC. My next question is if you are baiting him....it seems you are still in absolute no trust mode. Your gut told you there is something still there and now you have that confirmation.
Author unodos1011 Posted April 9, 2012 Author Posted April 9, 2012 I definitely don't trust him and it will be a long time before I do. I sent another reply to him and he blew me away with the answer he have "her". Basically that he's been through hell but he wouldnt give a single second of it up. He said that he loves me and our kids and that even if we don't work out he wouldn't look her up because she's already shown she's not the type of person he would want to ever be with. Then he texted me every message that was exchanged and said he wouldn't be replying to anymore and made sure I had the password to the account so, I guess he didn't fail after all!
Author unodos1011 Posted April 9, 2012 Author Posted April 9, 2012 (edited) At the time I was disappointed that he would delete the message without even bringing it up to me and then responding to top it off. That's where he failed. It was breaking NC and it seemed like he was opening that door back up. just-a-poster, I get where you're coming from with that. The thing is, WH is disappointed in his own actions and he's opened up to me about it that he's angry that he risked everything on someone that he meant nothing to. I dont think it's that he sees her as tainted because he knows she messed around (not sex) with other people while her husband was around and while she was also in the A. She used the excuse that her BH liked to watch her do those things but that she hated it. He's not actually a cop, myself and her BH are. We were also neighbors and friends, since DDay we've put our stories of her together and it's truly like we knew two separate people. His anger with her comes from all the lying she's done to everyone and he sees her as a manipulator. I know she didn't tie him up and rape him and he has issues with blame shifting which has made R very hard but I don't think hes a serial cheater. I looked at this girl as his weakness and now I see she no longer has the grip on him that I thought she does. Edited April 9, 2012 by unodos1011 Spelling
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