9Lives Posted April 8, 2012 Posted April 8, 2012 Well it is definately my lost if this dont work out. This guy is attractive, considerate, all about me and for some reason, I just aint feeling it. I dont want to kiss him but i like him but I dont feel affectionate towards him. What do I do?
kaylan Posted April 8, 2012 Posted April 8, 2012 You dont settle. If youre not feeling it, youre not feeling it. Just keep it moving miss. 3
sid3 Posted April 8, 2012 Posted April 8, 2012 Well it is definately my lost if this dont work out. This guy is attractive, considerate, all about me and for some reason, I just aint feeling it. I dont want to kiss him but i like him but I dont feel affectionate towards him. What do I do? What do you do? About what, the lack of attraction or letting him down if he isn't already aware.
Author 9Lives Posted April 8, 2012 Author Posted April 8, 2012 What do you do? About what, the lack of attraction or letting him down if he isn't already aware. This guy is GREAT!!! It would definately be my loss. I feel so heavy about it but I dont even be wanting to kiss him. He seems more like a great friend
Author 9Lives Posted April 8, 2012 Author Posted April 8, 2012 Leave. Go ahead and put the nail in the coffin. You will be doing both of you a favor. Don't knuckle under, end it now. (sad face) No, I dont want to lose his friendship and I like talking to him. Idont want to be a big girl right now
spiderowl Posted April 8, 2012 Posted April 8, 2012 I'd give it one more date and see what happens. Attraction can grow but at the same time you don't want to mess the guy about. If you are still not feeling anything after that, at least tell him you really like him but are not feeling butterflies. It's up to him then whether he still wants to see you, knowing that you may not become involved with him in that way. Sometimes when you kiss, it makes all the difference. However, if you don't want to do that, it doesn't sound promising. 1
carhill Posted April 8, 2012 Posted April 8, 2012 Good friendships take months or years to build and people can have hundreds or thousands of friends over their lifetime. We all meet people we get on with, and then, they're gone back into the billions which make up humanity. I look forward to someday meeting someone attractive whom I'm not attracted to. Resolving that currently gives me a headache
Author 9Lives Posted April 8, 2012 Author Posted April 8, 2012 He want's to get you in the sack. He has been friend zoned, put him out of his misery. NO JOE!!!!!! LOL!! I cant right now. Im gonna give it more time...like another couple of dates
SJC2008 Posted April 8, 2012 Posted April 8, 2012 How many dates are we talking?? Attraction can grow so I'd say give it time. But if he kisses you to soon that may be the death of things so it's a sticky situation. I'd say give it at least 3 dates and 5 max, but spaced out at least once a week. I'd say give it a shot but don't go to long because then you'll be getting him into leading him on territory. Sticky situation wish I had a better answer.
Author 9Lives Posted April 8, 2012 Author Posted April 8, 2012 How many dates are we talking?? Attraction can grow so I'd say give it time. But if he kisses you to soon that may be the death of things so it's a sticky situation. I'd say give it at least 3 dates and 5 max, but spaced out at least once a week. I'd say give it a shot but don't go to long because then you'll be getting him into leading him on territory. Sticky situation wish I had a better answer. Ok I will do that! This guy treats me so good. He really goes out of his way to be sweet to me. I hope this gets better. Im sorry but you cant help it if you not feeling someone. It just the way it goes. I dont want to play with him but i just dont know what it is
westrock Posted April 8, 2012 Posted April 8, 2012 Well it is definately my lost if this dont work out. This guy is attractive, considerate, all about me and for some reason, I just aint feeling it. I dont want to kiss him but i like him but I dont feel affectionate towards him. What do I do? What do you want? Does "feeling it" mean "drama" for you? A lot of women claim they don't "feel it" but they are saying that because in reality there is no drama from the guy as one experiences with so called bad-boys. In a healthy relationship there will be no drama. To some no drama feels "boring" but they are just misinterpreting their feelings.
kaylan Posted April 8, 2012 Posted April 8, 2012 This poor sap has no clue what is going on with you. He needs to be (he should be) looking for more prospects in the meantime. I hope he doesn't put all his eggs in one basket. Let's say you go on that second date and you still have no chemistry with him, right? Well, why are you wasting this man's time? I don't know about you but my time is just as valuable as yours or anyone else's. He is going to go home empty handed, and lighter in the wallet. Why do this? Move on! This. You have no attraction to the guy. Stop wasting your or his time. Are you that desperate? Not trying to be rude, but I feel only a desperate person would settle for someone they have no romantic attraction for.
Author 9Lives Posted April 8, 2012 Author Posted April 8, 2012 This poor sap has no clue what is going on with you. He needs to be (he should be) looking for more prospects in the meantime. I hope he doesn't put all his eggs in one basket. Let's say you go on that second date and you still have no chemistry with him, right? Well, why are you wasting this man's time? I don't know about you but my time is just as valuable as yours or anyone else's. He is going to go home empty handed, and lighter in the wallet. Why do this? Move on! Joe, Im not sure yet. This could get better. Besides, isnt this part of dating? You try to see if a person is what you want. That is how you try to see. I just want to see if I feel different soon. If I dont, I will let him know. I promise. I wont take long
counterman Posted April 8, 2012 Posted April 8, 2012 I would say if you really want to, give it ONE more date, but I think it'll be unlikely that you'll change. After that, if it's not happening, just let him go. If it were me, and I knew a girl was feeling this way about me and she still wanted to go on a date, I would say no. As others have said, time is valuable. I had a girl who went out with me because she thought I was 'great' but wasn't feeling it. Turned out to be a horrible relationship. 1
Author 9Lives Posted April 8, 2012 Author Posted April 8, 2012 What do you want? Does "feeling it" mean "drama" for you? A lot of women claim they don't "feel it" but they are saying that because in reality there is no drama from the guy as one experiences with so called bad-boys. In a healthy relationship there will be no drama. To some no drama feels "boring" but they are just misinterpreting their feelings. Hate drama! End of story
sid3 Posted April 8, 2012 Posted April 8, 2012 I say go on another date or two. He's a big boy, he should be ok. My guess is he'll appear far more attractive once you've met someone else who you are initially attracted to but doesn't treat you as well.
Author 9Lives Posted April 8, 2012 Author Posted April 8, 2012 This. You have no attraction to the guy. Stop wasting your or his time. Are you that desperate? Not trying to be rude, but I feel only a desperate person would settle for someone they have no romantic attraction for. Well I was attractive to him at first. I just dont know why Im not feeling him. I just feel like I need to give it a try. I just came to LS to get help with what I going thru
prune juice Posted April 8, 2012 Posted April 8, 2012 (sad face) No, I dont want to lose his friendship and I like talking to him. Idont want to be a big girl right now oh brother 1
kaylan Posted April 8, 2012 Posted April 8, 2012 Well I was attractive to him at first. I just dont know why Im not feeling him. I just feel like I need to give it a try. I just came to LS to get help with what I going thru Fine...give it a try...but dont force it. If you still dont feel it after a couple more dates, then thats that. 1
Author 9Lives Posted April 8, 2012 Author Posted April 8, 2012 Fine...give it a try...but dont force it. If you still dont feel it after a couple more dates, then thats that. thank you!
Ninjainpajamas Posted April 8, 2012 Posted April 8, 2012 This guy is GREAT!!! It would definately be my loss. I feel so heavy about it but I dont even be wanting to kiss him. He seems more like a great friend Just because he treats you GREAT on a first date you think you know him and everything you need to know to determine that he'd be a great guy to be in a relationship with otherwise? You don't know anything about him, he's putting his best foot forward, appears to be doing the right things...stop being so naive and act like you've known this guy on a close and personal level for years. Besides that, put yourself in his shoes...is this how you would want to be treated If you went out with someone you really liked and they were so-so about you and didn't really feel it? would you rather string them along or just let them find someone who deserves the same interest level. Just remember, what goes around comes around! Go on a few dates If you must, but don't mislead the guy because I don't want to hear you whining when a guy does it to you and you had all these "hopes and dreams"....It's funny how people are ok with doing it to others but when it comes to them being on the other end they question it and feel like it's so wrong.
CarrieT Posted April 8, 2012 Posted April 8, 2012 Don't give up on him! I was the same with my current BF; he was way too nice for me and I wasn't attracted to him (he looked "nice" and I like the bad-boy look). I gave it several more dates and now I'm head-over-heels. It just took a while and I was ready to write him off... 1
wwwjd Posted April 8, 2012 Posted April 8, 2012 Jeez. (forehead slap) TRUE LOVE AT >>> FIRST <<< SITE DOES NOT EXIST, PEOPLE!!! It's flash lust that starts it (even if you don't feel it now). Then love is only GROWN from there. It's not instant. I forced my friend ship on my last girlfriend... she wasn't even looking at me. Then SLOWLY, over time, she got to know me and really started to love me and THEN affection grow. SLOWLY at first and then wonderfully beautiful. It didn't work out because over a longer time we found our life directions were different, but it was all slow and comfortable... not instant feeling everything perfectly. I give things a month or two to feel themselves out, and for a true relationship, a full year to see how it goes. 1
threebyfate Posted April 8, 2012 Posted April 8, 2012 Dated around 8 great guys and turned down a helluva lot more than that, before I met my husband. Doesn't matter how hard you try. If the chemistry isn't there, it doesn't magically appear. Don't settle like so many people have done, to their long-term regret. It's really possible to have a connection that spans intellectual, emotional and physical. It's possible to find someone awesome AND compatible. 1
Frank13 Posted April 8, 2012 Posted April 8, 2012 (sad face) No, I dont want to lose his friendship and I like talking to him. Idont want to be a big girl right now I knew this was coming. My sarcastic suggestion was going to be to friend zone him, lead him on, have him fall in love with you, and then tell him you will never be more than just friends. It amazes me how women will knowingly let a guy suffer because they don't want to lose his friendship or stop talking to him. It;s called selfishness and it sounds like you are full of it.
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