PhillyDude Posted April 6, 2012 Posted April 6, 2012 1. Getting messages from too many women over 40 2. Considered too old for most women in the 24-29 age range 3. If I date someone in the 30-35 range they are expecting to settle down soon 4. I don't have much dating experience so it's not wise to try and get serious with someone older who is looking to settle down 5. At my age, it appears that the purpose of dating is to see who is marriage material instead of boyfriend material It's depressing to know that during the years when I was just able to date without hearing questions about kids and marriage was wasted because of my shyness which was from 17 to 28. Now at my age it's not too many women going on dates in their 30's looking for a boyfriend. Which means my only option is to go out with 21-25 years old but I'm slowly getting too old for that age group. I never been attracted to older woman in my life and get sick to my stomach when I see a message from 41 year olds. I always dated down in age but the problem is now is that those down ages are 30 and up. Which means I don't even get to gain any relationship experience because most women expect guys my age to start thinking about kids, marriage, and buying a house. So trying to date a woman with no kids in her 30's will lead to her bringing up the kids topic because her biological clock is ticking. So I got a little emotional this morning because I realized these are my only dating options at my current age 1. Date a older woman with kids 2. Date a older woman without kids 3. Date a woman in my age range with kids 4. Date a woman in my age range without kids only if I plan to have kids 5. Date a woman under 30 with kids This is why I have no choice but to pay women from craiglist to spend time with me because I have limited options when it comes to dating. This is also why that last rejection was so PAINFUL because she was 27, attractive, and lived close by. Those type of rejections were less painful 10 years ago but now as I continue to get closer to 40 it becomes depressing. BTW: There are not many woman over 36 who are attractive because most of them are already taken and married. So the messages I get from older woman are the ones who are unattractive
SadGrl Posted April 6, 2012 Posted April 6, 2012 I am 32 and a late bloomer. But i stopped caring about females and such. I mean if something comes up great, if not, their lose. I am awesome and I am living for my self. I get to spend all the time doing all the things I want all day long. Don't have to take a girl to dates or movies and do, watch things she wants to do. I get to dress like I want and not care what she might think. I don't know bro, being 30+ and single is GREEEEEEEEAT! 2
Anela Posted April 6, 2012 Posted April 6, 2012 I'm 36, and have had my share of messages, some from much older men, some from much younger men, and occasionally from men closer to my own age. I meant to save the information for a few of them, when I deleted my first account last Summer, but I didn't, and I'd deleted the emails one night when in a bad mood. I don't have much dating experience either. That's one reason I've wanted men my own age, or thereabouts.
Jane2011 Posted April 6, 2012 Posted April 6, 2012 I'm 36, and have had my share of messages, some from much older men, some from much younger men, and occasionally from men closer to my own age. I meant to save the information for a few of them, when I deleted my first account last Summer, but I didn't, and I'd deleted the emails one night when in a bad mood. I don't have much dating experience either. That's one reason I've wanted men my own age, or thereabouts. How much older or younger will you go?
Jane2011 Posted April 6, 2012 Posted April 6, 2012 PhillyDude, I would think plenty of 26-30 year old women would date a mid-30s guy. I don't see that as too young for you. 1
Anela Posted April 6, 2012 Posted April 6, 2012 (edited) How much older or younger will you go? I'm not sure, but I've just stopped trying for now. Maybe for good. This part of my life has always been weird and disappointing (partially my fault, due to not taking care of certain things sooner), and I felt better when I wasn't trying - when I was focused on other things. The highest age I had on my profile was 39. The lowest was 29 - taking a cue from the men - but that was more about looking for friends. The last person I had an interest in, was my age. He's moving out of state, though. Edited April 6, 2012 by Anela 1
HeavyHitter Posted April 6, 2012 Posted April 6, 2012 I am 32 and a late bloomer. But i stopped caring about females and such. I mean if something comes up great, if not, their lose. I am awesome and I am living for my self. I get to spend all the time doing all the things I want all day long. Don't have to take a girl to dates or movies and do, watch things she wants to do. I get to dress like I want and not care what she might think. I don't know bro, being 30+ and single is GREEEEEEEEAT! I agree with this. No need to chase immature women.
Author PhillyDude Posted April 6, 2012 Author Posted April 6, 2012 PhillyDude, I would think plenty of 26-30 year old women would date a mid-30s guy. I don't see that as too young for you. I know I met a 27 year old who was ok with my age and it didn't lead to anything. That's why the rejection was painful because I;m not going to get many opportunities like that at my age.
RedRobin Posted April 6, 2012 Posted April 6, 2012 You're probably right. The attractive ones over 40 don't want your drama. Sorry. 2
Author PhillyDude Posted April 6, 2012 Author Posted April 6, 2012 You're probably right. The attractive ones over 40 don't want your drama. Sorry. Some dating sites don't even have a age range for people over 40. The one I'm on now has three age groups 18-24 25-31 32-37 I guess they figure anyone over 40 should not be on a dating site-lol
RedRobin Posted April 6, 2012 Posted April 6, 2012 Some dating sites don't even have a age range for people over 40. The one I'm on now has three age groups 18-24 25-31 32-37 I guess they figure anyone over 40 should not be on a dating site-lol okay... then how are you getting messages from women over 40?? you don't like getting messages from women even a few years older than you. Imagine what it is like getting messages from someone 10 or even 20+ years older than you. That is what alot of younger women are thinking when they get messaged too. Annoyed. You are just going to have to find a way to be ok with the ones who also want you... or just don't date. That's life. 3
Anela Posted April 6, 2012 Posted April 6, 2012 okay... then how are you getting messages from women over 40?? you don't like getting messages from women even a few years older than you. Imagine what it is like getting messages from someone 10 or even 20+ years older than you. That is what alot of younger women are thinking when they get messaged too. Annoyed. You are just going to have to find a way to be ok with the ones who also want you... or just don't date. That's life. Yep. Men over 40 and 50, mostly ignoring women their own age. Most men my own age, seem to feel entitled to someone younger.
Imajerk17 Posted April 6, 2012 Posted April 6, 2012 I don't know why you insist on limiting yourself on such a site. Why don't you do match? I agree w Jane that there are plenty of women in their late-20's who would consider dating a guy in his mid-30's. It's not your age that's the problem dude. 1
Author PhillyDude Posted April 6, 2012 Author Posted April 6, 2012 okay... then how are you getting messages from women over 40?? you don't like getting messages from women even a few years older than you. Imagine what it is like getting messages from someone 10 or even 20+ years older than you. That is what alot of younger women are thinking when they get messaged too. Annoyed. You are just going to have to find a way to be ok with the ones who also want you... or just don't date. That's life. They are still on the site but they just don't have a age section for them.
Author PhillyDude Posted April 6, 2012 Author Posted April 6, 2012 I don't know why you insist on limiting yourself on such a site. Why don't you do match? I agree w Jane that there are plenty of women in their late-20's who would consider dating a guy in his mid-30's. It's not your age that's the problem dude. Match.com requires you to pay before you can see who is on the site in your area which to me means..............SCAM
dasein Posted April 6, 2012 Posted April 6, 2012 Match.com requires you to pay before you can see who is on the site in your area which to me means..............SCAM It's so worth it, unless you live in a tiny area. If you live in a large city, it's a slam dunk. A huge % of profiles on free sites are either fake or attention whores. At least you know that women you are corresponding back and forth with on match paid to be there. Match is really where you need to be in the mid 30s. Good luck.
Author PhillyDude Posted April 6, 2012 Author Posted April 6, 2012 It's so worth it, unless you live in a tiny area. If you live in a large city, it's a slam dunk. A huge % of profiles on free sites are either fake or attention whores. At least you know that women you are corresponding back and forth with on match paid to be there. Match is really where you need to be in the mid 30s. Good luck. I try to stay in between $14.99 and $24.99 when I pay for a membership on a dating site. Paying $49.00 is way too high for a monthly membership for match
Mr. Slim Posted April 6, 2012 Posted April 6, 2012 PhillyDude I am right there with you, I made a similar post in the past. You CAN get women in their late twenties and early thirties, but it probably won't happen online. In "real life" people know what they like and a statistic like age isn't really needed. In OLD age looms very large... it's one of the first things they learn about you. With women holding more options online then men, I just don't think women are going to consistently choose men more than a few years older than them. You need to get out and be social. 1
dasein Posted April 6, 2012 Posted April 6, 2012 I try to stay in between $14.99 and $24.99 when I pay for a membership on a dating site. Paying $49.00 is way too high for a monthly membership for match Did they go way up? I always got a 3 month deal when I did it that was like $54 for 3 months. Still dirt cheap IMO in comparison to the results.
lso802 Posted April 6, 2012 Posted April 6, 2012 Most men my own age, seem to feel entitled to someone younger. Could be true. When I worked retail, there was a seriously hott 39 y.o. woman who came to fix the displays sometime. Nice personality, too. I was 19 at the time and would have wifed. She showed me a picture of her daughter instead.
FitChick Posted April 6, 2012 Posted April 6, 2012 I know you can find coupons and discounts for some dating websites online. You probably can't use it for a resurrected profile.
Author PhillyDude Posted April 6, 2012 Author Posted April 6, 2012 Did they go way up? I always got a 3 month deal when I did it that was like $54 for 3 months. Still dirt cheap IMO in comparison to the results. But I may want to sample the site and may not want to commit 3 months. What happens if after a month no replies and no dates?
Andy_K Posted April 6, 2012 Posted April 6, 2012 If you make a profile on match but don't subscribe, every month or so they'll throw you a 'buy one month get one month free' deal (or at least the UK site does) to entice you in, so just wait for that to come around and get 2 months for $30 or whatever the monthly price is where you are. Also, I've never been contacted by any fake profiles there, so if you aren't subscribed there's a pretty good chance whatever winks and mail you get (but can't see) are genuine, unlike a lot of other places.
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