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Don't know how to deliver the message to him


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Posted

My SO and I broke up a few days ago and I wish he didn't act clingy, in fact, if he acted strong and independant I might even get my spark back. He mails me and texts me sounding so needy and I totally understand what he is going through but I wish he'd understand that he's totally turning me off like this. Should I tell him anything or just go NC and ignore him (that'd hurt me so much...)? I feel awful, we agreed to give me time to sort out my feelings but he still contacts me.

Posted

my first thought is that if you ever think you will want him in your life at any time you will address his sorrow, before he thinks f*ck you, he's only human

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Posted
my first thought is that if you ever think you will want him in your life at any time you will address his sorrow, before he thinks f*ck you, he's only human

 

I just don't want to give him false hope or anything, but it's killing me inside seeing him like this :( I don't want him to hate me but I can't assure that "my feelings will come back if you do this or that", so I don't really know what to say to him...

Posted
I just don't want to give him false hope or anything, but it's killing me inside seeing him like this :( I don't want him to hate me but I can't assure that "my feelings will come back if you do this or that", so I don't really know what to say to him...

 

put yourself in his grief-laden position and take it from there

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Posted
put yourself in his grief-laden position and take it from there

 

Matter is... I can't ease his pain because I can't go back to him at the moment. All I want is for our relationship to work through and we agreed that I needed time. In his place I would be crazy for him to contact me but if it meant driving him away even further I would rather have NC than losing him forever and I am scared about the possibility of that happening to me :( I'm just so confused about myself, I can barely cope with the pain for the two of us.

Posted
Matter is... I can't ease his pain because I can't go back to him at the moment. All I want is for our relationship to work through and we agreed that I needed time. In his place I would be crazy for him to contact me but if it meant driving him away even further I would rather have NC than losing him forever and I am scared about the possibility of that happening to me :( I'm just so confused about myself, I can barely cope with the pain for the two of us.

 

so you'll be okay is a cute peice of ass gives him a happier time than you? why do you expect him to wait until you have had enough time, when notably you have not even given him a time-frame of your absenteeism so he's left hanging and hoping - and miserable?

Posted
I just don't want to give him false hope or anything, but it's killing me inside seeing him like this :( I don't want him to hate me but I can't assure that "my feelings will come back if you do this or that", so I don't really know what to say to him...

 

Tell him exactly that and for him to stop contacting you and give you space. He needs time to heal, too. Absolutely do not give him false hope. He sounds like a very sensitive and caring and feeling man, based upon your post.

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