gaius Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 When she puts up with my nonsense and puts in way more effort than I do.
wwwjd Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 - pouncing in quick and hard - OVER interest - lack of self - fake smiles - on first meeting, dropping to the ground and grasping my leg so tight while sobbing, "Please, PLEASE TAKE ME!!!" That gets old.
verhrzn Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 When she puts up with my nonsense and puts in way more effort than I do. Okay I don't get this. If a woman doesn't put up with your nonsense... like, she just leaves... then yeah you might view her as less desperate but she's now gone. Seems like kind of a catch-22?
brokenTom Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 Same types of things that makes a guy appear desperate to women.
gaius Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 Okay I don't get this. If a woman doesn't put up with your nonsense... like, she just leaves... then yeah you might view her as less desperate but she's now gone. Seems like kind of a catch-22? Then I have to spend time charming her back which I'm happy to do if I know I'm in the wrong. It usually doesn't get that far though. More like if I say I'm going to call and I don't. If she pretends nothing happened and doesn't call me on it in some way I lose a little respect. I even had one girl apologize because she ended up going to bed an hour after I said I was going to call and thought she might have missed me. She was a sweetie but that reeked of desperation. Don't ever do something like that. How are you today vertical?
verhrzn Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 Then I have to spend time charming her back which I'm happy to do if I know I'm in the wrong. It usually doesn't get that far though. More like if I say I'm going to call and I don't. If she pretends nothing happened and doesn't call me on it in some way I lose a little respect. I even had one girl apologize because she ended up going to bed an hour after I said I was going to call and thought she might have missed me. She was a sweetie but that reeked of desperation. Don't ever do something like that. How are you today vertical? God what a freaking rock-and-hard-place. Women are supposed to be sweet and accommodating, but too much and guys lose respect. If you call them on their BS though, then you're an overreacting b*tch. Talk about not being able to win. 2
gaius Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 God what a freaking rock-and-hard-place. Women are supposed to be sweet and accommodating, but too much and guys lose respect. If you call them on their BS though, then you're an overreacting b*tch. Talk about not being able to win. It's easy once you get the hang of it. A lot of smart women would just ignore my next few calls to get their point across. No direct confrontation necessary.
verhrzn Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 It's easy once you get the hang of it. A lot of smart women would just ignore my next few calls to get their point across. No direct confrontation necessary. Yay, mind games are the best! 2
Lil1 Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 I once dated a guy who told me that his ex used to write him poems and dedicate songs to him all the time, she used to bring him lunch to work everyday too. He thought it was cute at first but then he felt like it was too overwhelming and eventually lost interest in her. When I asked him why (since clearly she was head over heels for him!) he said it's because those lovey dovey acts came off as needy when done in excess.
bac Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 What makes a woman appear desperate to a guy?? I am not a guy. But, IMO, it is saying 'yes' to meeting him for the first time today if he calls you today, it is kissing on the first date, having sex on the 1/2/3d dates, contacting men first after any wonderful dates in the begining of the dating.
Cypress25 Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 It's easy once you get the hang of it. A lot of smart women would just ignore my next few calls to get their point across. No direct confrontation necessary. Ah, so you like your women passive aggressive. Sounds like you know how to build a healthy relationship!
Andy_K Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 I am not a guy. But, IMO, it is saying 'yes' to meeting him for the first time today if he calls you today, it is kissing on the first date, having sex on the 1/2/3d dates, contacting men first after any wonderful dates in the begining of the dating. Are you kidding? Those are signs of interest, not desperation. Except perhaps for the first one, which is closer to spontaneity. My best relationships have started from kissing on the first date and sex somewhere between dates 1-3. 3
mesmerized Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 God what a freaking rock-and-hard-place. Women are supposed to be sweet and accommodating, but too much and guys lose respect. If you call them on their BS though, then you're an overreacting b*tch. Talk about not being able to win. No trust me. You can be smart and not let a man run all over you without being considered a bitch. I have done this before and will do later. Just date sane men and you'll be ok! 1
dasein Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 If I pop out from under her bed and she says "hey there stranger!"
gotye Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 Yay, mind games are the best! ya, this guy really doesn't deserve a girl so nice as to wait for his call
gaius Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 Ah, so you like your women passive aggressive. Sounds like you know how to build a healthy relationship! I like women who have respect for themselves. 2
gotye Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 I like women who have respect for themselves. ignoring each other isn't respect for anything, sounds like you have no respect for a caring relationship! if a guy doesn't call me, ya, i won't apologize for maybe missing it... but I won't ignore him for a few days for it i would COMMUNICATE with him how that is NOT OKAY
veggirl Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 Desperate.....trying to jump into an insta-relationship is the big one for me. That and putting up with BS that no healthy woman would really put up with (see both of these all the time on LS).
Feelsgoodman Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 I am not a guy. But, IMO, it is saying 'yes' to meeting him for the first time today if he calls you today, it is kissing on the first date, having sex on the 1/2/3d dates, contacting men first after any wonderful dates in the begining of the dating. This post is another example of the fact that men and women have totally different thinking patterns. If I asked a girl out and she agreed to meet me the same day, it would lead me to conclude that a) she is interested in meeting me and b) that's she open to spontaneous ideas. Both of the above are good things. Kissing on the first date - indicates that we have a great connection. If I tried to kiss her and she refused, it would make things very awkward and I likely would not ask her out on another date. Having sex on the 1/2/3rd date - not a big deal to me. It's a myth that men write women off as "sluts" for having sex too early. 3
threebyfate Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 What makes a woman appear desperate to a guy??Indiscriminate leg humping is an indication of desperation.
daphne Posted April 5, 2012 Posted April 5, 2012 I like women who have respect for themselves. I think Gaius is just telling the truth. I've seen men respond well to women that put their foot down, and really lose attraction to women who don't. As a female, you can get angry about it because you'd rather be the nice girl. Or you can be realistic and take responsibility for not being a doormat to a guy that will eventually lose interest. 1
prune juice Posted April 5, 2012 Posted April 5, 2012 I think Gaius is just telling the truth. I've seen men respond well to women that put their foot down, and really lose attraction to women who don't. As a female, you can get angry about it because you'd rather be the nice girl. Or you can be realistic and take responsibility for not being a doormat to a guy that will eventually lose interest. what truth? doormat is overused.
USMCHokie Posted April 5, 2012 Posted April 5, 2012 I don't think I have once encountered a desperate woman... Though I've seen some pathetic ones...
Feelsgoodman Posted April 5, 2012 Posted April 5, 2012 I think Gaius is just telling the truth. I've seen men respond well to women that put their foot down, and really lose attraction to women who don't. As a female, you can get angry about it because you'd rather be the nice girl. Or you can be realistic and take responsibility for not being a doormat to a guy that will eventually lose interest. It really depends on the man in question. I hate to use terms like "alpha" and "beta" but I can't think of anything more appropriate in this instance. A beta male who seeks both, a girlfriend and mother figure in the same female would likely respond well to a woman "putting her foor down". On the other hand, a man who is more independent and closer to the alpha end of the spectrum expects his woman to be submissive and would not take kindly to such antics.
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