yessy21 Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 Im trying to write this so it can be understood. If you have any questions please feel free to ask. Im angry...hurt... dissapointed... and empty. my ex..(the father of my child) recently added me on fb. why? i dont know. did i accept? yes i did. we were together for a while and had our child... he was a great guy and the only thing he liked to do once in a while was go out and have a good time. he started hanging around the wrong crowd... and things went downhill from there. we have been seperated for almost 4 years. between these 4 years he was with someone else. but here comes the twist...he wouldnt call or anything but every couple of months he would look for me. show up at my door... ect...he does that all the time... it never fails... even my friends have noticed. i dont know why he does it. he wasnt seeing our child or expressed any interest in her like he used to. he loved her...before... she was his baby... Now its like she doesnt exist. i have been in an amazing relationship for a year with an amazing man. now this guy wants to send me a message saying he misses me and talking a whole bunch of things that im not sure about. Not once did he mention our daughter. i put his light out politley and he still has me on fb(which is very rare). he hasnt contacted me since. all he kept saying is "i have a plan" im still in love with this man but i dont want to ever be again. i have accepted that and that is what im sticking too. but i need help coping... i need to get his words out of my head. i wish i would have never accepted the friend request. i would delete facebook but i dont want to run from anything. and unfriending him might insult him and im trying to keep the peace. I know he doesnt love neither of us but what is he trying to do? why does he always do this? how can i stop feeling this way?
darkmoon Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 territory and property is how he sees you imho just checks in now and again 1
BewitchedandBothered Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 Im trying to write this so it can be understood. If you have any questions please feel free to ask. Im angry...hurt... dissapointed... and empty. my ex..(the father of my child) recently added me on fb. why? i dont know. did i accept? yes i did. we were together for a while and had our child... he was a great guy and the only thing he liked to do once in a while was go out and have a good time. he started hanging around the wrong crowd... and things went downhill from there. we have been seperated for almost 4 years. between these 4 years he was with someone else. but here comes the twist...he wouldnt call or anything but every couple of months he would look for me. show up at my door... ect...he does that all the time... it never fails... even my friends have noticed. i dont know why he does it. he wasnt seeing our child or expressed any interest in her like he used to. he loved her...before... she was his baby... Now its like she doesnt exist. i have been in an amazing relationship for a year with an amazing man. now this guy wants to send me a message saying he misses me and talking a whole bunch of things that im not sure about. Not once did he mention our daughter. i put his light out politley and he still has me on fb(which is very rare). he hasnt contacted me since. all he kept saying is "i have a plan" im still in love with this man but i dont want to ever be again. i have accepted that and that is what im sticking too. but i need help coping... i need to get his words out of my head. i wish i would have never accepted the friend request. i would delete facebook but i dont want to run from anything. and unfriending him might insult him and im trying to keep the peace. I know he doesnt love neither of us but what is he trying to do? why does he always do this? how can i stop feeling this way? Are you sure you are in love with him or is it the past; the person you used to know you are carrying feelings for? Any man who doesn't give his child the time of day is a capital L LOSER and I would defined his ass. Is he paying child support at the very least? Shaking my head; he friends you on FB; what can he offer you? He doesn't care about his own child---what does this alone tell you about this person?
TaraMaiden Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind - and in this case, the cruelty would be towards yourself, but in the long run it would be the kindest thing to yourself and your sanity. Healing and moving on isn't about them. it's about you. you really do have to erase this from your vision, and block him at every turn. While you are seeking to heal, you really do have to be ruthless, and think of yourself, first and foremost. This is no time to consider his feelings, whether he'd be offended, or whether what you do would be considered cruel, mean or unkind. Please take a look at the No Contact guide link in my signature. And remember the famous saying: the person who cares the least - controls the most. He really doesn't 'care' as much as you do. Anywhere near. so you have to take control - or this will never end..... 2
BewitchedandBothered Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 Are you sure you are in love with him or is it the past; the person you used to know you are carrying feelings for? Any man who doesn't give his child the time of day is a capital L LOSER and I would defined his ass. Is he paying child support at the very least? Shaking my head; he friends you on FB; what can he offer you? He doesn't care about his own child---what does this alone tell you about this person? That should read "delete" his ass, darned spell check.
Author yessy21 Posted April 4, 2012 Author Posted April 4, 2012 It tells me hes a ****ty person. if i go no contact with him again things will get better. but then in a couple of years... am i still going to feel this way? 1
TaraMaiden Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 I would hope in a couple of years you'd have trouble remembering what he looks like..... 2
BewitchedandBothered Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 get that nauseating fool off your Facebook page. he need not have a peek into your life.
TaraMaiden Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 I believe the word you're looking for, is nauseating 'bombaclot'..... 2
BewitchedandBothered Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 I believe the word you're looking for, is nauseating 'bombaclot'..... Right on!!!! LOL!!!!!! One of my new favorite terms from our CopingGal:)<3 1
Whisky1981 Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 Hm....I dont have children and so I am a little underqualified to give you advices for the matter in question. I`ll just say that I deleted my ex from FB half an hour after our BU just to not see her cunning eyes and the ugly soul that hid behind them. So....yea....delete him from FB, when he comes at your door just ask him if he had come to see his daughter. And find someone new. Dont even think about him anymore. 1
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