Numb79 Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 Ok.... so my female friends tell me that gifts don't matter in a relationship. They say that these things are just materials... My question is..... how come no one ever thinks about all the hard work and sacrafices it takes to buy these gifts. I mean, I am not rich by any means.... however, I do get by. Its not like I just have several hundred bucks just laying around to buy designer heels, purses, jewelry....etc. etc. I basically have to save a little every month in order to purchase these items. Make little sacrafices in my daily life just so I can put a smile on someone else's face. How come that doesn't seem to matter? Do people even think about that?
robkris8079 Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 gifts don't mean anything. I even made a post in my breakup thread of how my ex bought me a TV for Vday last year. Sure it's nice to get a new lcd tv but I also said how I would have rather had a card with some nice words written in it. Things I did that had meaning were taking the day off of work on a day I knew she had off and driving her up to Boston for the day. Sure that cost a little money but it was about spending the day together in a whole new place we never been before and making a memory. Asking her out on a date after we had already been together for 5 years. Then leaving the house we use to live in and coming back with some chocolates and a single flower for her and ringing the door bell to my own house. One time I felt like I was throwing out I love you's and thinking maybe she had just started feeling I was saying them to just say them. So I decided to write her a list of all the reason's I loved her. It filled up pretty quick. One night I drew her a picture of a flower. Not some silly kid picture, a very detailed, shaded and real life looking picture that took me quite some time to do. I can go on and on with things that mean way more then gifts that cost money. I know everyone works hard for their money but when it comes to love there shouldn't be any dollar signs ($) anywhere. 1
Author Numb79 Posted April 2, 2012 Author Posted April 2, 2012 I understand that money doesn't mean anything in a relationship. The point I am trying to make is the sacrafices that one makes to buy these gifts. For example.... not getting things you want, cutting out that morning cup of coffee from the coffee shop, taking out a loan for a vacation..... things of that nature?
darkmoon Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 anything made of marzipan will bring me happiness, it's true, it's the thought that counts
robkris8079 Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 I understand that money doesn't mean anything in a relationship. The point I am trying to make is the sacrafices that one makes to buy these gifts. For example.... not getting things you want, cutting out that morning cup of coffee from the coffee shop, taking out a loan for a vacation..... things of that nature? Nope the sacrifice as you are calling increases with the dollar figure. So in my head they are one and the same. Like I stated earlier I got a TV, but would have been happier with a card. Hell a post it note would have been better. I did not think of her sacrifice in order to pay for the TV one little bit. This is just my opinion and may be different then many others.
Whisky1981 Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 I always bought nice gifts to my gfs in the end they dumped me bcs the relationship got bored at some point and they found a new guy to play with. What bothers me the most is that my gifts werent a material thing although they were nice and sometimes expensive too...but my gifts were always connected to her wishes and words she expressed troughout our relationship. So I was listening all the time to what she liked and wanted and after saving the money I bought that to her. On the other side I have never had a girlfriend that listend to my words and got me something I was wishing for...I wanted them to listen to me and I threw some clues here and there...but nothing came out of it. What I want to say is that it seems that gifts really dont matter. Is the tought thet counts. If my girlfriend would bought me something I really like it would only grow my love for her because she cared and listened to me. All this said the most important thing is to love your gf/bf every day of your life not only when you give gifts to her/him.
light_vader Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 On the other side I have never had a girlfriend that listend to my words and got me something I was wishing for...I wanted them to listen to me and I threw some clues here and there...but nothing came out of it. You know, out of the $$$ cost or whatever, I wish my ex had given me at least a beautiful card or something really worth it that would show she put some effort... instead, for my birthdays she only got me the most strange weird stuff that would only belong to.. the garbage can?But you know, I think I also wasted too much money on her, and I don't think it's because I wanted to balance something missing but I dunno, I just wanted to give her things she needed.Needless to say, will never do that ever again.But I also got some thoughtful things for her, like the usual mix-cd stamped with a photo of us, also a list of thing I loved about her and several cards.. I can be really chessy when I want.I remember the first card I gave her... God.. she started crying so much, telling me how nobody had done that for her bla bla bla.In the end what we must realize they are nothing but material gifts, whether items, handcrafted or whatever, they are MATERIAL.The gifts that matter, are the times well spent, those things and ocassions that will bring up memories. Should have tried to build up more on that. Next time.
Recommended Posts