idontunderstan Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 My ex broke up with me back in August, you can go through the forums and find my old topics if you want but it's really not important anymore. That's where my story starts. There is absolutely no feelings anymore and I'm so happy where my life is and where it's going. SO much better without her and it seems so strange that I never understood that while we were dating haha I'm about to graduate high school and I've made some of the best friends in the world since we've been broken up. I really haven't spoken a word to her since september and that's the way I want to keep it. Now I'm just faced with the this like road block type of thing. It feels as if i wont let myself be happy with anyone else. One of my buddies keeps telling me that it's probably because I haven't found a girl that I really really like it. He went through the same thing I did about a year before me and is just now settling into a relationship that he's really happy with. I think I kind of agree with him, but it also feels like I'm afraid to get into another ****ty relationship like my last one and feel trapped again. It's just like, I've liked 4 girls in the past 8 months or so and each time I've done something to mess it up, usually consisting of my own thoughts telling me it won't work out, for one reason or another. That's my main problem, is a find the negatives about a girl and forget the positive. That was always the opposite before the breakup. Now I kind of have like a negative depiction of relationships and am skeptical and afraid for all my friends who have girlfriends, even though they're happy as can be. I just don't want them to get hurt. Which is another thing, I'm putting so much more effort now in making sure my friends are happy because, while I got into my last relationship, she was so controlling that I basically lost every single friend I had. So I don't want that to happen again. I'm definitely smarter now and I have the confidence now to end a relationship if its not working for me but that's not possible if I can't allow myself to even start one... But also I'm not sure if I necessarily WANT a relationship, it's kind of nice being single. There are positives and negatives to a relationship, and to be honest...I feel like I want something LIKE that but without the commitment, if that makes sense.
JoeyArnold Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 So much better without her. Agreed. I've felt this way at times. This may not always be the case, still. Be open minded.
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