Ross MwcFan Posted April 1, 2012 Posted April 1, 2012 I find that I have never clicked with the majority of women, on even just a feriendship level. It's so rare that I do. Is this normal, is this how it is for most guys? Or could this have some sort of connection to my failure with women on a romantic level?
Els Posted April 1, 2012 Posted April 1, 2012 How do you define 'click'-ing? Have you really not had a single female friend?
PlumPrincess Posted April 1, 2012 Posted April 1, 2012 Is that a problem just with women? Or are you not having difficulties making friends with people in general?
John Tucker Posted April 1, 2012 Posted April 1, 2012 Maybe he just means getting to know girls at a deeper level. As in more of being mere acquaintances.
Fondue Posted April 1, 2012 Posted April 1, 2012 The only females that I make great friendship connections with are those I am not sexually interested in.
Oxy Moronovich Posted April 1, 2012 Posted April 1, 2012 I don't think most guys click with women on a friendship level. If we could, guys wouldn't complain about being friendzoned. 1
Author Ross MwcFan Posted April 1, 2012 Author Posted April 1, 2012 How do you define 'click'-ing? Have you really not had a single female friend? It's hard to explain, but just getting on with each other conversationally I guess. I've only had about 3 female friends offline.
RedRobin Posted April 1, 2012 Posted April 1, 2012 I find that I have never clicked with the majority of women, on even just a feriendship level. It's so rare that I do. Is this normal, is this how it is for most guys? Or could this have some sort of connection to my failure with women on a romantic level? yes.......
Author Ross MwcFan Posted April 1, 2012 Author Posted April 1, 2012 To add to my last post - Yet I've had many many male friends. yes....... Yes to which question?
Author Ross MwcFan Posted April 1, 2012 Author Posted April 1, 2012 (edited) Is that a problem just with women? Or are you not having difficulties making friends with people in general? Just women. Maybe he just means getting to know girls at a deeper level. As in more of being mere acquaintances. No, I don't mean at a deeper level. Edited April 1, 2012 by Ross MwcFan
RedRobin Posted April 1, 2012 Posted April 1, 2012 To add to my last post - Yet I've had many many male friends. Yes to which question? The one where you might be having trouble connecting at a romantic level. Alot of guys will disagree with me (especially the ones who don't think men and women can be friends), but I really think that the ability to have raport with women that does NOT include sex is a really important attribute. It really does add to the level of comfort a woman might have with a man. all that he-man chest beating male/female dynamics thing doesn't fly with me. I need to feel valued as a person first... as something to f*ck second. Well, I take that back. I can accept being viewed as the latter if the former follows closely afterward
Oxy Moronovich Posted April 1, 2012 Posted April 1, 2012 The one where you might be having trouble connecting at a romantic level. Alot of guys will disagree with me (especially the ones who don't think men and women can be friends), but I really think that the ability to have raport with women that does NOT include sex is a really important attribute. It really does add to the level of comfort a woman might have with a man. all that he-man chest beating male/female dynamics thing doesn't fly with me. I need to feel valued as a person first... as something to f*ck second. Well, I take that back. I can accept being viewed as the latter if the former follows closely afterward Don't listen to this chick, Ross. Her posts regarding male and female relationships are delusional. She knows the vast majority of men do not wanna be just friends with women. Nor do the vast majority of men think a platonic friendship with a woman is important. A significant percentage of men tried to be platonic friends with women but were bored by it so much to say, "Never again." Ross, you're not alone. Just remember most guys dislike platonic friendships with women. 1
PhillyDude Posted April 1, 2012 Posted April 1, 2012 I have platonic female friends now but it doesn't go beyond the phone. That is the definition of a platonic friendship between man and woman., "No Face to Face communication"
RedRobin Posted April 1, 2012 Posted April 1, 2012 Don't listen to this chick, Ross. Her posts regarding male and female relationships are delusional. She knows the vast majority of men do not wanna be just friends with women. Nor do the vast majority of men think a platonic friendship with a woman is important. A significant percentage of men tried to be platonic friends with women but were bored by it so much to say, "Never again." Ross, you're not alone. Just remember most guys dislike platonic friendships with women. Right. Ok. Keep telling yourself that. My long-married male friends and relatives all have female friends. Or... sisters. Either way, these men have become accustomed to viewing women as more than just a hole to plug. Sorry if that rocks your little boat, Oxy. 4
PhillyDude Posted April 1, 2012 Posted April 1, 2012 Right. Ok. Keep telling yourself that. My long-married male friends and relatives all have female friends. Or... sisters. Either way, these men have become accustomed to viewing women as more than just a hole to plug. Sorry if that rocks your little boat, Oxy. How often do they see each other face to face? I always thought a platonic friendship with a woman was a "distance friendship" which only involved the phone, email, or instant messenger.
Jane2011 Posted April 1, 2012 Posted April 1, 2012 I have quite a few platonic friendships with men, and I don't think it bothers them. A few are special circumstances, though, that easily explain why it's purely on the friendship tip. When I was with my ex-boyfriend (for five years), he had some male friends who I became friends with, too. Now that he and I are broken up, they're still my friends (I even do see them without the ex-boyfriend around; they email me in private sometimes, etc., etc.). There's no danger of ever getting together because they know that would be a violation of the unspoken rule not to get involved with your friend's ex-girlfriend, etc. These are guys who are involved with other women, frequently talk to me about other women, tell me I can stay at their place if I am ever in their city (they have moved to California and New York). They're not romantically interested in me; they have other women. They're just my friends. I also have another male friend who is purely just a friend (he's with another woman right now) because he and I already got together and it didn't work out. We're still friends, though. Other male friends...I'll admit I can sense they'd be on board if I showed some romantic interest. But they're also cool with me not showing romantic interest; they still want to get together and talk about common interests / just socialize. They have dates and women of their own in general... I run in circles where it's very, very normal for men and women to be friends. There's no resentment involved. 2
Oxy Moronovich Posted April 1, 2012 Posted April 1, 2012 Right. Ok. Keep telling yourself that. My long-married male friends and relatives all have female friends. Or... sisters. Either way, these men have become accustomed to viewing women as more than just a hole to plug. Sorry if that rocks your little boat, Oxy. Relatives are different. Friendship amongst relatives is different than friendship amongst non-relatives. And I love how you pointed out you know "long-married" male friends with "female friends". How do you know these female friends aren't mistresses to these married men? Ross and I are part of the majority of men: we do not care for female friends if it doesn't involve sex.
RedRobin Posted April 1, 2012 Posted April 1, 2012 How often do they see each other face to face? I always thought a platonic friendship with a woman was a "distance friendship" which only involved the phone, email, or instant messenger. It depends. If they tend to move around alot (the woman or the man) then they keep in touch remotely. Where I live now, my long married male friends have other female friends that they see (in addition to me), oh, once a month maybe? Sometimes longer than that. Every few months perhaps. Not that much different than their male friends. It is usually involving an activity the wife has no interest in... and the female friends are friends with their wife too. That's what it looks like.
RedRobin Posted April 1, 2012 Posted April 1, 2012 Relatives are different. Friendship amongst relatives is different than friendship amongst non-relatives. And I love how you pointed out you know "long-married" male friends with "female friends". How do you know these female friends aren't mistresses to these married men? Ross and I are part of the majority of men: we do not care for female friends if it doesn't involve sex. Because I usually know their their other female friends too. Noone is trying to hide anything or 'get over' on anyone. *shrug*
irin Posted April 1, 2012 Posted April 1, 2012 I have platonic female friends now but it doesn't go beyond the phone. That is the definition of a platonic friendship between man and woman., "No Face to Face communication" it seems your romantic relationships doesnt go beyond the phone either, you must be one loved customer by your phone network! lols:laugh: sorry i just couldnt help myself!
ariadne999 Posted April 1, 2012 Posted April 1, 2012 How often do they see each other face to face? I always thought a platonic friendship with a woman was a "distance friendship" which only involved the phone, email, or instant messenger. do you have a lot of friends you never see face to face? I bet those "women" friends of yours are really she males jerking off to your pretty pretty face PD.
PhillyDude Posted April 1, 2012 Posted April 1, 2012 do you have a lot of friends you never see face to face? I bet those "women" friends of yours are really she males jerking off to your pretty pretty face PD. The only friends I was seeing face to face was the ones I work with. My other friends moved to other areas.
Jane2011 Posted April 1, 2012 Posted April 1, 2012 I think people are missing out if they don't have some friends of the opposite sex who they see in person, have lunch with, share with, etc. It's great to get their honest perspectives about things. I'm always fascinated by things I hear from male friends. Also, my best male friend is my ex. We're one of those rare ex-couples who are able to stay friends after the break-up (it didn't happen right away; it took about 8 months to get there, but it did). We're the best of friends. We talk about moving to the same city, etc, not because of romantic ties, but because we're friends and sort of have the same desires, living-area-wise. He just met a woman about a week ago who he may start dating (they kissed), and I was really excited for him. I love him forever, as a friend. I don't mind if people don't have opposite sex friends (maybe it's just never happened), but I do find it odd to be absolutely un-desiring of having opposite sex friends.
Feelsgoodman Posted April 1, 2012 Posted April 1, 2012 Don't listen to this chick, Ross. Her posts regarding male and female relationships are delusional. She knows the vast majority of men do not wanna be just friends with women. Nor do the vast majority of men think a platonic friendship with a woman is important. A significant percentage of men tried to be platonic friends with women but were bored by it so much to say, "Never again." Ross, you're not alone. Just remember most guys dislike platonic friendships with women. I'm not sure I totally agree with this. I am certainly capable of "clicking" with women on a non-sexual level (as in, being able to have an interesting interaction without any sexual tension). The problem is that women usually want to be friends with men for very specific and selfish reasons. A woman's idea of "friendship" with men involves accumulating a male "fan club" comprised of beta males who are attracted to her and supply the much needed attention and validation. A secondary objective is getting these guys to do favors for her. Personally, I don't believe in being friends with a woman I'm attracted to. I also don't believe in doing favors for women. If you do a favor for a guy, it is understood that he now owes you a favor back. Women, on the other hand, don't believe in returning favors. They seem to think that being in possession of the magic vagina automatically grants them social privileges (and I can't totally blame them either, as there's no shortage of beta supplicators who think they can get into a woman's pants by being her errand boy).
Oxy Moronovich Posted April 1, 2012 Posted April 1, 2012 Here's something interesting about male/female friendships: women are greatly in favor to them; men are greatly adverse to them.
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