The Blue Knight Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 Overdosed America is one of those books, written by an MD who blows the lid off the FDA and BigPharma's practices. Quite eye opening. Haven't read that one yet fitchick. I'm blown away by how sheepish Americans are on this entire subject, and how corrupt the FDA is. Where large government is invested, they protect what they want to protect, and that's not the interest of individual Americans health.
The Blue Knight Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 I don't find him attractive at all. But he's funny, and that makes up for his being overweight
mesmerized Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 But he's funny, and that makes up for his being overweight No it doesn't. I want to like what I see
The Blue Knight Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 No it doesn't. I want to like what I see And I suppose Sheldon Cooper is too thin????
NeverDated Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 It also depends on how the changes are related to overall personality changes. If my active, energetic fun partner turned into a lazy couch potato, that might affect my attraction more than the accompanying weight gain. Bears repeating. This is why my boyfriend dumped his ex. Refused to take her meds, put on 100+ pounds in less than 6 months due to depression eating, most of her best friends couldn't even stand to be around her. Most people don't just "put on weight" in any meaningful amount without a pretty significant personality shift. Now, leaving a serious relationship because the other person was in an accident and put on weight during the recovery...that would fall under shallow, petty and downright mean in my opinion.
namenottaken Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 You want to introduce BMI numbers as evidence of some male hypocrisy on this issue, that's wrong on three levels, you get called on it, and of course it's about me being "blind." No one has ever said obesity wasn't a male problem, what I have said is that IME, men don't let themselves go after marriage to the extent women do. Which is why I posted to show that more men are overweight than women, and you discount the men’s number as being too high. Never mind that the women’s number could be as well. LS always manages to disappoint. So in your world the number of women and men doing serious bodybuilding (not Zumba, yoga, and spin class) and competitive sports is equivalent, most female fitness enthusiasts are seeking to build extraordinary muscle mass just like the guys, and female bodies are every bit as capable as male in achieving the kind of extraordinary muscle mass that voids the usefulness of BMI? Sure whatever. In my world I don’t know one single serious bodybuilder. I know guys who lift weights, but I wouldn’t call it serious. How many athletes and serious bodybuilders are in yours? Perhaps about 7 million to equal the disparity? Sure whatever. The point I’m trying to make is that as many men (not bodybuilders and athletes, of course) are overweight too. Now it’s my turn to be disappointed that I don’t live in your world of male athletes and body builders. And in case you missed it the first time: I think it’s a given (or it should be) that the BMI is not individualized, but is a good base to use. If you want individual accuracy get a fat caliper and a measuring tape. I’ll amend that to add …good base to use “if you’re not an athlete or bodybuilder.” I can’t dispute what goes on in your life, nor would I want to. I’m pointing out that this problem is just as relative to men as it is to women, but men (not all) don’t seem to see it as such. They are only seeing the women who are overweight. In my world, where the woman has ‘let herself go’, I see the woman getting the kids up, dropping them off at school (or the sitters), going to work, picking up the kids, going grocery shopping, making dinner, cleaning the house, helping with homework, getting the kids ready for bed and falling asleep in exhaustion only to start the process over in the morning. The men go to work, come home, eat dinner,watch T.V. and go to bed when they get tired. What’s happening in the lives of the women you see who ‘let themselves go’? No one can know what really goes on in the privacy of another person’s home, but it seems to me that if this is happening someone isn’t happy. No one just ‘let’s themselves go’ without a reason.
FitChick Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 In my world, where the woman has ‘let herself go’, I see the woman getting the kids up, dropping them off at school (or the sitters), going to work, picking up the kids, going grocery shopping, making dinner, cleaning the house, helping with homework, getting the kids ready for bed and falling asleep in exhaustion only to start the process over in the morning. So that is a lot of activity right there. When do they have time to eat? You'd think those women would be underweight instead. I can't help but wonder what they are eating (and how much).
dasein Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 Which is why I posted... Once more, I stand by everything I've said about BMI in this thread. Body mass index - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
mesmerized Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 And I suppose Sheldon Cooper is too thin???? He is lol But I could have sex with him still I'm picky, what can I say@ 1
Chubbi Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 I have known 3 women who were angry about their men's weight gain and willing to break up with them; when women use weight gain for men as an issue, it's really a symptom of bigger problems. One is a blonde woman who married a dentist. The dentist has apparently been gaining weight, and she was complaining to me about it and already talking about divorcing him after 3 years of marriage. She was 27 and they had a 1year old together. I know for sure if he knew her true feelings about him, he would've been shocked. I wonder how they are doing now, because she was really trying to divorce him for wierd reasons: not helping her plan a party, making comments about her mothering. She always complained about him and said, "We're definitely going to divorce; I'm glad he's out of town with his friends; I'm sick of him." She was a stay at home Mom by the way, but refused to cook for him, and demanded he give her nice stuff- manicures, big windows on their house. Another friend was a black woman who said she wasn't physically attracted to her bf of 7 months b/c he was fat and she was never attracted to him. He wasn't fat. The real reason was she was getting a new high-paying job, and he didn't make the kind of money she wanted. She didn't admit to that though, but it was suspicious that earlier the year, she wanted to marry him, but when new job came along, she saw everything bad about the poor guy. The last was an small Asian woman who divorced her husband. When she met him, he was star quarterback in college, but he looks soo different now with the weight-gain, unfortunately. She, however, told me that everyone tells her she looks younger than her daughter and how she needs to keep out of the sun to keep her beautiful skin. She was drinker though and could drink her weight. She was a pediatrician. So, it is not a male/female thing; I think women will talk about weight gain on their Hs and men, when really they just don't like them for other reasons...
soserious1 Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 Making up my relationship checklist now.. let's see 1. Since I own my home outright I should allow my partner to move in rent free. 2. I earn great money, therefore I should expect to "help out" a lower earning partner. 3. I must remember that all of the above must be heavily discounted by me, my contributions minimized & apologized for. 4. I must do at least 50% of all cooking, cleaning & domestic tasks in order to prove I'm not an elitist & not treating my partner as inferior merely because I support them. 5. I must remain as slim & toned as possible 6. if he lets himself go, I'm to remain loving & supportive, constantly looking to discover ways that I can ease his daily burden even more. I'm not allowed to ever level with him by flat out telling him what a sexual turnoff his over weight body is becoming to me. Did I get all "the Rules" right? LOL!
johan Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 You didn't mention that you need to be in a good mood all the time. And also what you plan to offer in bed. 1
soserious1 Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 You didn't mention that you need to be in a good mood all the time. And also what you plan to offer in bed. oh yes! I must be a willing & ardent lover at all times, oral? anal? no problem, toys, costumes? no problem. Should he decide to decline my advances in favor of pleasuring himself with porn I must be loving & accepting that men have a need for variety.
Mme. Chaucer Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 Making up my relationship checklist now.. let's see 1. Since I own my home outright I should allow my partner to move in rent free. 2. I earn great money, therefore I should expect to "help out" a lower earning partner. 3. I must remember that all of the above must be heavily discounted by me, my contributions minimized & apologized for. 4. I must do at least 50% of all cooking, cleaning & domestic tasks in order to prove I'm not an elitist & not treating my partner as inferior merely because I support them. 5. I must remain as slim & toned as possible 6. if he lets himself go, I'm to remain loving & supportive, constantly looking to discover ways that I can ease his daily burden even more. I'm not allowed to ever level with him by flat out telling him what a sexual turnoff his over weight body is becoming to me. Did I get all "the Rules" right? LOL! Would you mind making me a strawberry rhubarb pie? I'm not a guy or anything, and I'm not fat yet (working on it), but since you seem ready to take on a lot … Just thought I'd ask. 2
soserious1 Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 Would you mind making me a strawberry rhubarb pie? I'm not a guy or anything, and I'm not fat yet (working on it), but since you seem ready to take on a lot … Just thought I'd ask. LOL, I'm not "ready to take on" anything, in fact looking over the list of what will be expected of me has solidified my resolve to avoid getting into any sort of committed relationship ever again.
Mme. Chaucer Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 LOL, I'm not "ready to take on" anything, in fact looking over the list of what will be expected of me has solidified my resolve to avoid getting into any sort of committed relationship ever again. Well, you can bake pie without the committed relationship!
soserious1 Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 Well, you can bake pie without the committed relationship! I'm not interested in baking for you or anybody else.
johan Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 oh yes! I must be a willing & ardent lover at all times, oral? anal? no problem, toys, costumes? no problem. Should he decide to decline my advances in favor of pleasuring himself with porn I must be loving & accepting that men have a need for variety. ...and always in a good mood.
phineas Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 Phineas, considering the way you have talked to me, and how I see you talk about women in general, I would not feel like you would be a very safe person to come to for any kind of information or support. But let it be recongnized that I provided information from legit sites that backed up everything I had been saying from teh beginning. You have yet to do so. It doesn't matter how many times you call me "hunny". It doesn't change the track record. LOL! There's the genric "mysogonist" rebuttal from one of the ls man-hater's. Oh, you wound me so. LULZ!
The Blue Knight Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 He is lol But I could have sex with him still I'm picky, what can I say@ You're funny. You'd have your work cut out for you however. In the show his character is not interested in such non-cerebral acts and in real life he's gay. But your point has been made!
The Blue Knight Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 I'm not interested in baking for you or anybody else. sorserious, you are funny. A bit too serious at times, but funny nevertheless.
Author gotye Posted April 2, 2012 Author Posted April 2, 2012 i don't even understand where this discussion is going to anymore 2
phineas Posted April 2, 2012 Posted April 2, 2012 As to which partner lets themselves go I think it's a toss-up after 40 (the age group I actually know) all I know is, i'm a sexy beast with an Atlas belt & I like my women the same.
Feelsgoodman Posted April 3, 2012 Posted April 3, 2012 Seriously. If you don't want to date someone, don't date them. But why get upset that other people find someone who you deem "too fat for love" attractive and choose to love them? This is a message of hate, and that's why I can't stand what these threads turn into. I actually didn't date fat guys when I was single -- not out of principle, but because it's not the aesthetic I prefer. Bigness, in general, is not something I dig. That's a personal preference. If I were to turn it into a crusade and associate largeness or fatness with "should not be loved," that would be bigotry. I suppose it'd be ironic of me to say that bigots should not be loved now. Message of hate? How so? I don't hate fat people...In fact, I feel sorry for them. Most of them are unhealthy and miserable. Being fat is not like being short or being black. Those are things than cannot be helped. Fatness can be helped. Choosing not to date people who are lazy and unhealthy is not hate. Unlike me, you are a hypocrite. You say 'ooh, there's nothing wrong with being a fatty...but I ain't dating one because "it's not the aesthetic I prefer"' You're being intellectually dishonest, while I give it straight.
johan Posted April 3, 2012 Posted April 3, 2012 Because she says she has no problem with people being fat, she's required to dig fat guys? Do you have a problem with people being quadraplegic?
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