Dumping Someone for Getting Too Fat

[threebyfate]

It is very difficult (though not impossible) to maintain a relationship when the attraction dies. If you do not meet each other's personal needs in other ways then it is even harder.

 

It seems callous to make break-up decisions based on how someone looks because in some respects we are encouraged not to be so shallow and superficial. However, sometimes, changes in appearance that might be regarded negatively could be manifestations of internal conflicts that need addressing. These would compound the situation, especially if both parties, and in particular the party who has changed, are unaware or refuse to acknowledge their existence.

 

It makes me sad to post along these lines but I think that I'm trying to acknowledge that physical appearance plays a bigger part than I would ideally like. Sad but true, if you will.

As well, being in a relationship shouldn't be a license to let yourself go. This isn't emotionally or physically healthy for either party within the relationship.

[FrustratedStandards]

I don't understand.

 

Going to the gym isn't rocket science. Why do fat people still exist?

 

(medical problems aside)

[dasein]

Outside of rare medical conditions, people have a right to expect their partner to maintain a reasonable standard of health, and that includes not getting fat. It's a very low baseline expectation.

 

The comparison with a man's income or a woman's is disingenuous because people generally have MUCH more control over their appearance and health than their income, and maintaining basic standards of health and an attractive appearance, other than when people reach old age, is just not that difficult.

 

For either partner to let themselves go in a relationship shows significant lack of respect for their partner. If a partner -purposefully- let themselves go passive aggressively or out of a sense of disdain, as opposed to working on relationship problems directly, that person is beneath contempt and should be turned right out in the street IMO as unsuitable for any relationship.

[musemaj11]

Should a woman date a man that starts earning less?

Generally she will lose attraction when that happens also.

[Disenchantedly Yours]

I don't understand.

 

Going to the gym isn't rocket science. Why do fat people still exist?

 

(medical problems aside)

 

I don't understand why you think that just because going to the gym isn't "rocket science" that it's easy to always maintain weight.

 

I was a chubby kid when I hit puberty. And I hardly ate anything. My brother on the other hand could eat a whole box of ceral and still be lean as a beanpole. We had different body types. Maintaining my weight today takes a lot of hard work. It isn't rocket science but it's not easy either. Sometimes life gets in the way. Sometimes certain people are only capable of so much. Sometimes it's hard to work 9-5 (plus any amount of time you may spend overtime at work to get things complete) then hit the gym 5 days a week. Sometimes you get injuries that prevent you from doing what you need to do and if you don't give it time to heal, you can rehurt it. Sometimes people have lives filled with work, family and helping elderly parents or voluenteering more then they care about fitting the gym. You simply don't know. So to judge any one overweight by th concept that going to the gym is not rocket science is really not fair FS.

[Disenchantedly Yours]

When does the "I'm fat becuse I had your child" reasoning become a lame excuse?

 

There are many, many women who put on little to no weight during or after pregnancy. I know a woman who had triplets a few years ago and now weighs less today than she did prior to pregnancy.

 

I think the "I'm fat because I just had your kid" excuse should be okay for a while. But if it's over a year later and she's still significantly overweight, it's reasonable for men to feel uneasy.

 

This is simple biology. Women ARE more fatty then men. Because women are the ones that have the babies. Pregnancy DOES change a woman's body. It doesn't excuse being morbidly aboese but today's standards of slenderness for women with huge boobs are for most women, unrealistic. Just because you know a woman who had x amount of kids and her body looks better then ever, doesn't mean all women have the same body type and can bounce back that easily.

 

When are men going to understand they have more lean muscle then women? I am not saying women should be obese.But I am sick and tired of men judging women for something they naturally have more of because of the reality that women are made more fatty due to having babies.

 

Guess what guys? It's simply easier for you most of the time, to have trimmer bodies then women. You have more muscle, less fat. In most cases, you will loose weight faster then a woman does. Perhaps it's men that should be held to a higher standard of fitness then women.

 

If you are angry and bitter over a female partner that gains weight, then perhaps committed relationships aren't for you. Relationships will change. bodies will change. This is what committment means. You go through the ups and downs. Husbands will loose jobs. Husbands and wives may gain weight. That's called life. But please, if you are interested in a woman having the body of Jennifer Aniston, by all means, make enough to support her so she can stay home, work out and get facials all day without having the stress of family and chores so she can maintain the picture perfect body you want.

[phineas]

I don't understand.

 

Going to the gym isn't rocket science. Why do fat people still exist?

 

(medical problems aside)

 

I don't understand why you think that just because going to the gym isn't "rocket science" that it's easy to always maintain weight.

 

I was a chubby kid when I hit puberty. And I hardly ate anything. My brother on the other hand could eat a whole box of ceral and still be lean as a beanpole. We had different body types. Maintaining my weight today takes a lot of hard work. It isn't rocket science but it's not easy either. Sometimes life gets in the way. Sometimes certain people are only capable of so much. Sometimes it's hard to work 9-5 (plus any amount of time you may spend overtime at work to get things complete) then hit the gym 5 days a week. Sometimes you get injuries that prevent you from doing what you need to do and if you don't give it time to heal, you can rehurt it. Sometimes people have lives filled with work, family and helping elderly parents or voluenteering more then they care about fitting the gym. You simply don't know. So to judge any one overweight by th concept that going to the gym is not rocket science is really not fair FS.

 

You both are prime examples of why people gain wait.

You demonstrate no real knowledge about fitness or nutrition.

 

90% of weight loss is diet.

The other 10% is exercise to burn a few extra calories.

People get fat because they eat too much not because they can't get to the gym.

 

The only reason you need to lift weights is to make sure your body retains muscle so you don't end up skinny-fat.

Cardio is for heart health.

 

People can't be all THAT busy if they can find time to shove enough crap down their pie-hole to get fat.

[phineas]

This is simple biology. Women ARE more fatty then men. Because women are the ones that have the babies. Pregnancy DOES change a woman's body. It doesn't excuse being morbidly aboese but today's standards of slenderness for women with huge boobs are for most women, unrealistic. Just because you know a woman who had x amount of kids and her body looks better then ever, doesn't mean all women have the same body type and can bounce back that easily.

 

When are men going to understand they have more lean muscle then women? I am not saying women should be obese.But I am sick and tired of men judging women for something they naturally have more of because of the reality that women are made more fatty due to having babies.

 

Guess what guys? It's simply easier for you most of the time, to have trimmer bodies then women. You have more muscle, less fat. In most cases, you will loose weight faster then a woman does. Perhaps it's men that should be held to a higher standard of fitness then women.

 

If you are angry and bitter over a female partner that gains weight, then perhaps committed relationships aren't for you. Relationships will change. bodies will change. This is what committment means. You go through the ups and downs. Husbands will loose jobs. Husbands and wives may gain weight. That's called life. But please, if you are interested in a woman having the body of Jennifer Aniston, by all means, make enough to support her so she can stay home, work out and get facials all day without having the stress of family and chores so she can maintain the picture perfect body you want.

 

Stop. you make my brain hurt with all the lame excuses.

 

Take a good hard look at pictures of families pre-mcdonalds, pre-processed foods.

You would be hard pressed to find a house wife from the 50's overweight.

Even if she had multiple kids.

 

Did the human race develop a "fat" gene?

Did we mutate?

 

No. so please just stop with the bro-science.

You make yourself look foolish.

 

simple fact, baring rare medical conditions, if you are fat it's because you eat too much. period.

[xxoo]

This is simple biology. Women ARE more fatty then men. Because women are the ones that have the babies. Pregnancy DOES change a woman's body. It doesn't excuse being morbidly aboese but today's standards of slenderness for women with huge boobs are for most women, unrealistic. Just because you know a woman who had x amount of kids and her body looks better then ever, doesn't mean all women have the same body type and can bounce back that easily.

 

Is there a medical reason that some reason can not return to pre-pregnancy weight after babies?

 

I understand that there are a lot of factors that make it difficult to prioritize exercise after having a baby. And I am aware that some women can not lose the weight while breastfeeding. But I am not aware of any way that pregnancy permanently changes a woman's ability to lose weight.

[Disenchantedly Yours]

You both are prime examples of why people gain wait.

You demonstrate no real knowledge about fitness or nutrition.

 

90% of weight loss is diet.

The other 10% is exercise to burn a few extra calories.

People get fat because they eat too much not because they can't get to the gym.

 

The only reason you need to lift weights is to make sure your body retains muscle so you don't end up skinny-fat.

Cardio is for heart health.

 

People can't be all THAT busy if they can find time to shove enough crap down their pie-hole to get fat.

 

Bullcrap. You have no clue about all the different body types out there do you? I KNOW what works for me. I eat very well. I also don't even eat that much. And I can not get by on a good diet alone. I need to execise. And a lot. I need to do both cardio and weight training. I don't have a natural muscle tone. My body completely changes when I stop working out even if I keep eating right. I don't only need to lift weights to "retain muscle", I need it to build muslce. Because when I stopped doing weight lifting training, my muslce disappeared. Some peopel certainly do have natural muslce tone. and guess what? Other's don't and will quickly loose muslce if they do not regularly keep it up.

 

Again, you ignore the reality that men have more easily more muslce mass than women. Some women do have natural muscle tone too. But it is always going to be easier for a man to drop some pounds because he builds muslce faster then a woman will. Please read up on health and body. You clearly don't know as much as you think.

 

 

Stop. you make my brain hurt with all the lame excuses.

 

Take a good hard look at pictures of families pre-mcdonalds, pre-processed foods.

You would be hard pressed to find a house wife from the 50's overweight.

Even if she had multiple kids.

 

Did the human race develop a "fat" gene?

Did we mutate?

 

No. so please just stop with the bro-science.

You make yourself look foolish.

 

simple fact, baring rare medical conditions, if you are fat it's because you eat too much. period.

 

I never claimed that there weren't a lot of obese people in the world today. There are. We certainly have a problem with food and obescity. My point is more in reference to just how thin men expect women to be today. I bet the body mass index of the average woman pre-interent was still a lot thicker then what the body mass index is expected t obe of a woman men consider attractive. We seem to be a little off in our conversation. I am not excusing obese people and I certainly think it's an epidemic. I however think there is also an unrealstic perception about how thin women should be to considered "healthy" as well.

 

I go to the gym regularly and I have seen people there for years who are very physically fit who do not have the tight little bodies you might thing they should have. Yet they are healthy. Not everyone is going to be stick thin and built even if they are healthy. And some thin people aren't even that healthy just because they can eat a bunch of crap and still be thin.

[Disenchantedly Yours]

Is there a medical reason that some reason can not return to pre-pregnancy weight after babies?

 

I understand that there are a lot of factors that make it difficult to prioritize exercise after having a baby. And I am aware that some women can not lose the weight while breastfeeding. But I am not aware of any way that pregnancy permanently changes a woman's ability to lose weight.

 

I didn't say that "pregnancy permanently change a woman's ability to lose weight". I said that pregnancy in general does change a woman's body. Sometimes breasts grow with milk, then they shrink up and don't look the same they did. Sometimes tummies stretch out and don't bounce back to their former glory. Sometimes fat is re-distributed. After my cousin had her kids, her hair went from really ringlet curls to being wavey. She doesn't get her curls anymore. The pregnancy change the hormones and chemcials in her body. My girlfriend's husband is a doctor and she just had another baby not too far after her first baby. She was always a tiny little thing with a flat tummy. And she was recently complaining about how she couldn't get off some of her baby weight off. Her husband was just telling her that women's bodies often change with pregnacy. He is so understanding and supportive of her. Maybe women should marry doctors that understand these things lol.

 

This doesn't mean that a woman should be obese, but bodies change. It can be harder for some women to loose weight. Sometimes their bodies don't just 'bounce back". And the women that's bodies do bounce back are very lucky and that's great for them. But that doesn't mean that's what everyone's body is capable of. Again, women naturally have more fat! That doesn't justify being obese but I think the standard that women are held to of thinness aren't healthy either. And just because one woman had twins and now is thinner then ever doesn't mean it's possible for everyone.

[phineas]

Bullcrap. You have no clue about all the different body types out there do you? I KNOW what works for me. I eat very well. I also don't even eat that much. And I can not get by on a good diet alone. I need to execise. And a lot. I need to do both cardio and weight training. I don't have a natural muscle tone. My body completely changes when I stop working out even if I keep eating right. I don't only need to lift weights to "retain muscle", I need it to build muslce. Because when I stopped doing weight lifting training, my muslce disappeared. Some peopel certainly do have natural muslce tone. and guess what? Other's don't and will quickly loose muslce if they do not regularly keep it up.

 

Again, you ignore the reality that men have more easily more muslce mass than women. Some women do have natural muscle tone too. But it is always going to be easier for a man to drop some pounds because he builds muslce faster then a woman will. Please read up on health and body. You clearly don't know as much as you think.

 

 

 

 

I never claimed that there weren't a lot of obese people in the world today. There are. We certainly have a problem with food and obescity. My point is more in reference to just how thin men expect women to be today. I bet the body mass index of the average woman pre-interent was still a lot thicker then what the body mass index is expected t obe of a woman men consider attractive. We seem to be a little off in our conversation. I am not excusing obese people and I certainly think it's an epidemic. I however think there is also an unrealstic perception about how thin women should be to considered "healthy" as well.

 

I go to the gym regularly and I have seen people there for years who are very physically fit who do not have the tight little bodies you might thing they should have. Yet they are healthy. Not everyone is going to be stick thin and built even if they are healthy. And some thin people aren't even that healthy just because they can eat a bunch of crap and still be thin.

 

Read first few sentences, don't need to read any more.

You are just simply ignorant and your excuses make my brain hurt.

 

I lost 100lbs hunny.

I didn't starve myself & I didn't spend hrs in the gym.

 

I know what i'm talking about.

you don't.

 

Come to me when you are ready to be educated & LISTEN to what people who actually know what their talking about tell you.

[xxoo]

I didn't say that "pregnancy permanently change a woman's ability to lose weight". I said that pregnancy in general does change a woman's body. Sometimes breasts grow with milk, then they shrink up and don't look the same they did. Sometimes tummies stretch out and don't bounce back to their former glory. Sometimes fat is re-distributed. After my cousin had her kids, her hair went from really ringlet curls to being wavey. She doesn't get her curls anymore. The pregnancy change the hormones and chemcials in her body. My girlfriend's husband is a doctor and she just had another baby not too far after her first baby. She was always a tiny little thing with a flat tummy. And she was recently complaining about how she couldn't get off some of her baby weight off. Her husband was just telling her that women's bodies often change with pregnacy. He is so understanding and supportive of her. Maybe women should marry doctors that understand these things lol.

 

This doesn't mean that a woman should be obese, but bodies change. It can be harder for some women to loose weight. Sometimes their bodies don't just 'bounce back". And the women that's bodies do bounce back are very lucky and that's great for them. But that doesn't mean that's what everyone's body is capable of. Again, women naturally have more fat! That doesn't justify being obese but I think the standard that women are held to of thinness aren't healthy either. And just because one woman had twins and now is thinner then ever doesn't mean it's possible for everyone.

 

I understand that women's bodies change, and the fat can redistribute after pregnancy. I've experienced that

 

What I am asking is, is there a medical reason that it is harder for women to lose weight after pregnancy than before?

[zengirl]

Is there a medical reason that some reason can not return to pre-pregnancy weight after babies?

 

I understand that there are a lot of factors that make it difficult to prioritize exercise after having a baby. And I am aware that some women can not lose the weight while breastfeeding. But I am not aware of any way that pregnancy permanently changes a woman's ability to lose weight.

 

Not to "lose weight" in general but pregnancy can shift the distribution of fat around -- in some women it makes the woman look "better" than she did before and in some "worse" (i.e. some get more fat distributed on their tummy and some on their boobs, etc), and in many women, it also slows down their baseline metabolism. This certainly does not mean they cannot lose ANY weight, but they may not be able to get down to the size they were before -- particularly while caring for an infant, as you say, but even from a physical standpoint -- in a healthy way, depending on a variety of factors. That said, saying they have to stay "fat" is an exaggeration. The truth is, they may always be 5-10 lbs heavier or have a slightly less attractive distribution of fat or something like that, but if anyone is so shallow not to allow for that in a partner they chose to have a child with, I think they'd have to be a giant *******.

 

If someone gained a significant amount of weight -- with the exception of a medical issue, particularly in a marriage (I strongly believe "in sickness and in health" myself, just as I strongly believe "for richer or poorer." I don't necessarily believe, "No matter what you do") -- I can see bringing that up and wanting to address it in the relationship. It generally would have to come with a major change in lifestyle and health choices. I don't think we're duty-bound to "stay hot" for our partners or be left, but I do think we're duty-bound not to let ourselves go immensely and fall into vastly unhealthy habits they would never have dreamed of prior to the relationship.

 

However, there's going to be some slight weight gain for most people as they age and their metabolism changes. You CAN still stay very thin or very fit, but it would have to be a major priority. If someone prioritizes those things, they need to make it absolutely clear they always will -- I do not think most people prioritize those things very high as they age and that the average person is more concerned with living their lives in other ways than staying in tip-top physical shape.

 

So, basically, it depends. Some cases are cut-and-dried:

 

1.) Your spouse changes his/her whole lifestyle, gains a significant amount of weight (50+ lbs), and looks like a totally different person than the healthy partner you married. You try to talk to them and express that you want to have the same lifestyle together you did before and try to figure out if there are any underlying problems, but they are resistant to hear you. Eventually, you leave, because you are neither physically attracted, nor feel connected to that person anymore.

 

That makes total sense to me.

 

2.) Your spouse gains a few pounds and their metabolism starts to level out. Maybe you have kids and less time, and the gym falls by the way side. He/she loses muscle definition and gains a bit of fat. His/her body changes with age. You leave because you only wanted him/her at peak attractiveness.

 

That sounds like an ******* to me.

 

Most scenarios are probably far in between. As xxoo said on the first page, I think if someone has an immense weight gain, there will probably be lifestyle issues that actually impact the R more than just the physical factor anyway. And as someone else said, maintaining physical attraction toward a partner is an important component of a relationship --- however if you have an excessively narrow window for what that is (i.e. "I'll only love you between these weights"), I think you should express it PRIOR to the relationship becoming serious -- maybe not in that way, but state that even as you age remaining very fit is important to you. To some people, it is. But to most, I really don't think it's super important -- not that they don't try to maintain a reasonable weight, maybe some skin care, and their health, etc, but they don't fixate on it all THAT much.

[phineas]

I understand that women's bodies change, and the fat can redistribute after pregnancy. I've experienced that

 

What I am asking is, is there a medical reason that it is harder for women to lose weight after pregnancy than before?

 

Didn't you read?

Their "body type" changes.

Apparently there is a body type where you eat "very little" exercise 5 days a week & still gain fat.

[Disenchantedly Yours]

Read first few sentences, don't need to read any more.

You are just simply ignorant and your excuses make my brain hurt.

 

I lost 100lbs hunny.

I didn't starve myself & I didn't spend hrs in the gym.

 

I know what i'm talking about.

you don't.

 

Come to me when you are ready to be educated & LISTEN to what people who actually know what their talking about tell you.

 

I am SURE you didn't starve yourself or spend hrs at the gym. That is my WHOLE point. People have different body types and require different amounts of working out or eating right. I bet you could easily pack away a whole steack without gaining too much weight more easily then I could. I don't understand what is so "ignorant" about that. I am also not making up "excuses". I am just stating realities. I know my body. I know what it requires to loose weight. I don't loose it quickly. I need to work out because if I don't, I loose my muscle mass. I bet you maintain your msucles much easier then my body type does. I am not excuses obesecity. I am just saying that the ideal standards of how thin women should be aren't always healthy or easy either.

 

And I AM educated in this subject. I think you need to get more educated.

[shayla]

When does the "I'm fat becuse I had your child" reasoning become a lame excuse?

 

There are many, many women who put on little to no weight during or after pregnancy. I know a woman who had triplets a few years ago and now weighs less today than she did prior to pregnancy.

 

I think the "I'm fat because I just had your kid" excuse should be okay for a while. But if it's over a year later and she's still significantly overweight, it's reasonable for men to feel uneasy.

 

 

i agree...however, the woman that gains no weight and having triplets? more the exception than the rule. It takes time to heal, for the hormones to normalize again, and getting through the dead tiredness that comes along with having a baby and spending months with no sleep and with little help....a year is a good time frame, if she has help, even better.

[Disenchantedly Yours]

Agree with what you said Zengirl.

[xxoo]

Not to "lose weight" in general but pregnancy can shift the distribution of fat around -- in some women it makes the woman look "better" than she did before and in some "worse" (i.e. some get more fat distributed on their tummy and some on their boobs, etc), and in many women, it also slows down their baseline metabolism.

 

Is there medical evidence that it slows metabolism? Separating out factors of age and lifestyle changes?

 

I'm really curious about this. I know a lot of moms who would be interested in this!

[Oxy Moronovich]

So I guess a year after the woman has her baby, it's okay for a guy to want her to go back to being thin. Cool. Glad we cleared that up.

Is there medical evidence that it slows metabolism? Separating out factors of age and lifestyle changes?

 

I'm really curious about this. I know a lot of moms who would be interested in this!

I'm curious about this as well. Anyone have a link?

[phineas]

I am SURE you didn't starve yourself or spend hrs at the gym. That is my WHOLE point. People have different body types and require different amounts of working out or eating right. I bet you could easily pack away a whole steack without gaining too much weight more easily then I could. I don't understand what is so "ignorant" about that. I am also not making up "excuses". I am just stating realities. I know my body. I know what it requires to loose weight. I don't loose it quickly. I need to work out because if I don't, I loose my muscle mass. I bet you maintain your msucles much easier then my body type does. I am not excuses obesecity. I am just saying that the ideal standards of how thin women should be aren't always healthy or easy either.

 

And I AM educated in this subject. I think you need to get more educated.

 

Bodytypes is a myth.

Please stop spreading poor information.

 

also. Lovely "I know you are but what am i" response at the end.

 

Prove you are educated.

what are your daily cals & macro's.

 

If you can't answer that off the top of your head then you are not educated.

 

I weigh & measure everything I eat every day & it takes very little effort to do.

 

You are spreading bad advice/information & need to stop.

[xxoo]

So I guess a year after the woman has her baby, it's okay for a guy to want her to go back to being thin. Cool. Glad we cleared that up.

 

No, not cleared up.

 

Babies can breastfeed for a year. It can be nearly impossible for some women to (safely) lose the weight while breastfeeding.

 

Also, studies suggest that the amt of sleep a new mother gets every night affects her ability to lose weight. That would depend on the baby, other children, other responsibilities, the dad's contribution, etc.

[phineas]

So I guess a year after the woman has her baby, it's okay for a guy to want her to go back to being thin. Cool. Glad we cleared that up.

 

I'm curious about this as well. Anyone have a link?

 

There reason women gain so much weight during pregnancy is because they over eat.

 

Strangely enough, men with women who are pregnant also tend to over eat with them.

 

My ex complains how fat she is all the time & uses the "baby weight" excuse. Except, our youngest is almost 4yrs old.

I tried helping her a few times & she doesn't want to listen & just wants to make excuses. So I gave up.

 

I have no idea how she can honestly believe it's because of the kids because I have photo proof of how skinny she was AFTER the kids.

 

She didn't get fat until she moved in with her BF. Lucky him. LOL!

[phineas]

No, not cleared up.

 

Babies can breastfeed for a year. It can be nearly impossible for some women to (safely) lose the weight while breastfeeding.

 

Also, studies suggest that the amt of sleep a new mother gets every night affects her ability to lose weight. That would depend on the baby, other children, other responsibilities, the dad's contribution, etc.

 

I agree with this.

You primarily burn fat while sleeping.

I've noticed I loose weight slightly quicker if i'm getting more than 6hrs a night.

 

Also, It's bad to cut cals while breast feeding.

But it's just as bad to eat so much food you start packing on the lbs.

 

But like I said, getting fat = eating more calories than your body is using.

 

There is no hidden force causing you to gain weight.

[zengirl]

Phineas,

 

You understand that in a healthy pregnancy a woman gains a significant amount of weight, right? Many women do overeat and gain more than that (most doctors tell them to cool it when they do) but all pregnancy includes a significant weight gain. So I understand if you're trying to say many women overeat -- many do -- but not if you're suggesting there should be no or little weight gain in pregnancy. It's unclear which you mean.

 

Is there medical evidence that it slows metabolism? Separating out factors of age and lifestyle changes?

 

I'm really curious about this. I know a lot of moms who would be interested in this!

 

Yes, I will try to dig some sources up later, but there is. It's one of the many reasons I've never been to keen on pregnancy. I love my high metabolism -- not just for the thinness, but for other reasons (medicine, for example, kicks in almost instantly when I take it, as does a glass of any kind of alcohol when I drink it, and alcohol also 'burns off' faster). Women with particularly high metabolisms are most likely to be impacted in the most dramatic fashion. A woman with an already slow or average metabolism was far less likely to be strong impacted, though. The impacts of pregnancy on cognitive function were the most disturbing to me, though. I know it's a miracle and all, but pregnancy really Fs you up!