starla33 Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 (edited) So that super nice guy that seemed not that interested? You know why? Because I met him on OKC and he sits on there all day and I finally got it out of him that he has a lot of options on there that he goes out with. I told him on our first date I DONT DO THAT. Why in he shocked all of a sudden when i bring it up? Of course I said this is not for me and peaced out. HES NOT EVEN THAT CUTE AT ALL, I seriously would never think a nerdy average looking guy would have THAT many options. I hate online dating. This is so depressing...hes literally one of the least attractive guys ive gone out with, I just figured he was safe because he was nice! What is even the point of giving nice guys a chance on dating sites if they are the same as the really hot dbags? Edited March 30, 2012 by starla33
veggirl Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 Well how nice could he be if you noticed he didn't seem that interested in you?
Author starla33 Posted March 30, 2012 Author Posted March 30, 2012 (edited) Well how nice could he be if you noticed he didn't seem that interested in you? He was still a nice guy (just because someone doesn't like you doesn't mean they aren't nice....this was not the case tho). I guess when you have THAT many options you have to rotate all of them and won't be very into any. How on earth is it possible to meet anyone serious on dating sites in this case? EVEN the nerds are multi-dating. UG Edited March 30, 2012 by starla33
AIDsFan1488 Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 He's definitely the exception to the rule . Any guy here will tell you the average man will have to send out 100's of messages before getting even a response. He must be wealthy or something, average looking nerds do worse on the internet than in real life.
Author starla33 Posted March 30, 2012 Author Posted March 30, 2012 He's definitely the exception to the rule . Any guy here will tell you the average man will have to send out 100's of messages before getting even a response. He must be wealthy or something, average looking nerds do worse on the internet than in real life. I don't know I"m in a city FULL of nerds so I think here nerds to quite alright. Just pisses me off he said hes looking for something serious and said he was all amazed at my morals and that all the other girls he went out with from there were slutty.
veggirl Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 Well he's not nice if you told him you don't multi date and aren't okay with people who do, and he led you to believe he wasn't/doesn't. Bullet dodged, I guess, and this explains his lack of attention he gave to you. Sorry that he led you on (if he did)
Author starla33 Posted March 30, 2012 Author Posted March 30, 2012 Well he's not nice if you told him you don't multi date and aren't okay with people who do, and he led you to believe he wasn't/doesn't. Bullet dodged, I guess, and this explains his lack of attention he gave to you. Sorry that he led you on (if he did) he never said he didn't he just said he was amazed at my morals. LOL....thats pretty messed up right there I guess. Anyway I can do way hotter. I'll get over it.
veggirl Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 he never said he didn't he just said he was amazed at my morals. LOL....thats pretty messed up right there I guess. Anyway I can do way hotter. I'll get over it. Oh, gotcha. Well his amazement should've been a clue, lol. Onward and upward
Author starla33 Posted March 30, 2012 Author Posted March 30, 2012 Oh, gotcha. Well his amazement should've been a clue, lol. Onward and upward I figured it was a good sign when he said he must have been looking in the wrong places before because girls he met were slutty.
SJC2008 Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 Starla sorry that you giving someone a chance backfired. I find it hard to believe that he has options. I am average/cute and yes I get dates but not a whole lot. When you say he was nice did he not make any moves or something?
Feelsgoodman Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 So that super nice guy that seemed not that interested? You know why? Because I met him on OKC and he sits on there all day and I finally got it out of him that he has a lot of options on there that he goes out with. I told him on our first date I DONT DO THAT. Why in he shocked all of a sudden when i bring it up? Of course I said this is not for me and peaced out. HES NOT EVEN THAT CUTE AT ALL, I seriously would never think a nerdy average looking guy would have THAT many options. I hate online dating. This is so depressing...hes literally one of the least attractive guys ive gone out with, I just figured he was safe because he was nice! What is even the point of giving nice guys a chance on dating sites if they are the same as the really hot dbags? So you are upset that a nerdy average-looking nice guy has options? I guess I see where you're coming from. If he was a "really hot dbag" it would be totally fine and you'd probably ride his jock despite your "amazing morals". But an average-looking guy...and a nice one at that...how dare he have options 2
Author starla33 Posted March 30, 2012 Author Posted March 30, 2012 Starla sorry that you giving someone a chance backfired. I find it hard to believe that he has options. I am average/cute and yes I get dates but not a whole lot. When you say he was nice did he not make any moves or something? well we kissed and all that, but that was it. I saw some of the girls he has gone out with I don't think he cares about looks that much so who knows....there are a lot of girls on okc.
Author starla33 Posted March 30, 2012 Author Posted March 30, 2012 So you are upset that a nerdy average-looking nice guy has options? I guess I see where you're coming from. If he was a "really hot dbag" it would be totally fine and you'd probably ride his jock despite your "amazing morals". But an average-looking guy...and a nice one at that...how dare he have options Yeah yeah I tried a nice guy obviously nice guys are NOT that nice or get a lot of attention on online dating and become dbags. One of those.
SJC2008 Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 well we kissed and all that, but that was it. I saw some of the girls he has gone out with I don't think he cares about looks that much so who knows....there are a lot of girls on okc. So how many times did yall go out? Did he ever compliment you? What was his contact frequency like? And what do you mean by safe?
Eternal Sunshine Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 In my experience, nice, average guys turn out to be the biggest dbags out there. It's better to just go for the hot guys 2
kaylan Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 I dont see the problem. He never lied to you and was honest about dating others. You guys just started dating to and things never got serious emotionally or physically. You decided the situation wasnt for you so you moved on. No biggie here. I wouldnt blame internet dating. The guy would have options elsewhere if he out and about as well id think. Youre being a little immature tyring to point out how undesirable and unattractive he is. He apparently looks good enough and is nice enough to have options. Dont hate on a guy for it. Just keep it moving and find a guy who doesnt multidate.
Emilia Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 I don't know I"m in a city FULL of nerds so I think here nerds to quite alright. Just pisses me off he said hes looking for something serious and said he was all amazed at my morals and that all the other girls he went out with from there were slutty. He was neg hitting you that's all. All this stuff is lies, he is guy who doesn't do well with girls and who isn't nice (probably comes across softly spoken though) and was trying to put pressure on you to put out. Seen it before. Cut contact. 1
AIDsFan1488 Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 (edited) In my experience, nice, average guys turn out to be the biggest dbags out there. It's better to just go for the hot guys Keep telling yourself that. Let's see how true it is when you're knocked up with a kid and us "nice, average guy" taxpayers have to foot the bill because the hot guy wants to smoke pot all day and tour with his band. All because you are, as a modern liberated American woman, incapable of picking a real, good man, who isn't a "nice guy" but also isn't on your romance covers. Instead you chase the masculine ideal they show you in your glossy magazines, usually portraying young body builders that have sucked an AIDS conventions worth of old queer cocks to get that position. An age old-philosophical question: When faced with a "hot guy", what is faster her self-described morals going out the window, or her panties hitting the ground? Anyway OP, if what you say is true without leaving important details out (like he's rich), now you know how us men of all the leagues feel all the time. You see the average looking guy getting all that attention in OLD, atleast judging solely from what you posted, he's an anamoly worthy of an emergency study by the world's greatest scientists. But for women, it's almost all of them, hot ugly plain fat stupid, especially if they do online dating. Edited March 30, 2012 by AIDsFan1488
gaius Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 He's probably lying to impress you. I remember a former acquaintance of mine who sounded exactly like kermit the frog, he used to brag about all the women he would get. He even said one girl couldn't get over him and kept calling. Like a woman couldn't get over a guy that sounded like kermit the frog, give me a break. We all just rolled our eyes. 1
Woggle Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 Is he not allowed to have options since he is deemed unworthy? He is not committed to anybody right now so why not. It would be one thing if he promised you something then went behind your back but right now he doesn't owe anybody anything. 1
phineas Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 If the guy was so unattractive why does she even care? I personally tell women not to expect exclusivity until sex is on the table. That is the only way I myself know their not still shopping around. They don't like that? Then we have different dating styles & it won't work out.
RedRobin Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 My only advice is not to judge a book by it's cover. A person could be 'gorgeous' and be constantly deluged by 'options' but still hold others in high regard and treat them with respect... not checking boxes because they can. Or, they can be full of pride and arrogance and be checking boxes all over the place. A person could be objectively less attractive by societies standards, and not be nice at all. Or, they could have used their less than ideal 'status' to develop empathy towards others and be genuinely loving... no matter how many or few 'options' come their way. You just never know. When I look at a picture, I look at the warmth of their smile. I need to see and sense their vulnerability. That to me shows they may be open to love.
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