Mehndi1983 Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 My boyfriend of 5 and a half years left me yesterday. He says that there are things we both need to work on but we aren't together anymore. I've been fighting with depression and anxiety for the past year and things were starting to look better (he even said that) and now I feel like the rug has been pulled out from under me. I can't believe he is gone, I love him and miss him so much. The sadness is so overwhelming at times I just want to end everything. I'm now living in our apartment alone and everywhere I look I see us. Right now I can't imagine it getting better. How do I move forward when I'm not ready to move past him?!!
budley12 Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 im sorry to hear that =( I too lost the love of my life (who was also my first love). We were together for 3 years and lived together the whole time. We did EVERYTHING together including traveling the country many times. I understand when you say you see him in everything you do. It has been 4months since my breakup and I still dream about him and see everywhere. It will not be easy. Since it is the day after the breakup I hope that things get back to where you want them. I would suggest going NC. I did that and my ex ended up wanting to get back after a month of NC. Unfortunately I fell for it and then got dumped again. As for your apartment... I rearranged all my things and got rid of alot of the decor he helped me pick out. I am now in the process of moving out and trying to have a fresh start.
Silent thoughts Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 I also just got hurt…...my ex (20) and I (21) were going out for almost 6 years and just a couple days after valentines day I get a call from her saying I am breaking up with you, I don't love you anymore, I met someone else... I was devastated as it completely hit me out of nowhere, as everything in our relationship was really good well at least thats what I thought, I guess she was just telling me lies, such as we are so much better, I'm so happy to be with you, and so on... Well she told me that she was seeing another guy behind my back, and was cheating on me with him for the last 6 weeks of our relationship, and how she had sex with him 4 times... Of course I became hurt and furious as to what happened.. The ironic thing is when we were going out, she “did not like me talking, texting,or anything with other girls, because, than you would start to like them, and leave me for them” which ironically she did to me.......it really hurts As she was my first real girlfriend and I was her first real boyfriend, but what really hurt was that she could do that to me, you know, we lost our virginity to each other..and she ruined that bond we had together... Worst of it is that just two days after she left me she got with that guy... And I constantly see her, and at times with him as well at college.. And it hurts cuz I know her so well, and she was my girlfriend, best friend, and the one person I would go out with, and be myself... It's A big change, but I'm trying to deal with it, it just hurts knowing she's with someone else.. Idk what I should do.? I truly love this girl... Do I just move on? And keep no contact or ? Everyone tells me she will regret what she did and come back to me.... but it doesn't make sense as she is the one who hurt me and left... Please I need advice!!!!!!!
budley12 Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 hey silent. i would recommend making your own post so it doesnt take away from the authors question. But I am going through exactly what you are experiencing. Us being each others first loves, living together on campus at college, still seeing my ex on campus. It sucks! But my email is [email protected] if you want to contact and can chat things out (i could still use someone to talk to about my situation as well).
Silent thoughts Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 i am sorry.. i did make a post but after like 180 views i had not one reply… so i became desperate lol… yea it would be great to talk about our situations. I will send you a message.
BewitchedandBothered Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 My boyfriend of 5 and a half years left me yesterday. He says that there are things we both need to work on but we aren't together anymore. I've been fighting with depression and anxiety for the past year and things were starting to look better (he even said that) and now I feel like the rug has been pulled out from under me. I can't believe he is gone, I love him and miss him so much. The sadness is so overwhelming at times I just want to end everything. I'm now living in our apartment alone and everywhere I look I see us. Right now I can't imagine it getting better. How do I move forward when I'm not ready to move past him?!! Mendhi, this just happened; please allow yourself time to heal and this means No Contact. He broke it off, no need to call him. You say you are living in the apartment---is is possible to get a new unit and start fresh? This way, you have a different place and you won't see 'him' everywhere you look. I am so sorry you are going through this. Coming here is a wonderful step, too, because the people on here have been very helpful and we are all walking on this healing journey together.
Chi townD Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 I want you to understand one thing. NO GUY IS WORTH ENDING YOOUR LIFE OVER!!! If those feelings are creeping back in there and you need help, go to the Emergency Room. Get help to get you through this, and talk to your doctor. Now, with that said, one of the first things you need to do is change the apartment. Redecorate the whole thing. New coat of paint on the walls and move the furnature around. Make it soo different that you think you're in a new apartment. Believe me, it does wonders. Now, it's time to work on you. Get a membership to a gym and start working out. Run on the treadmill and start pushing weight. It's a great way to handle stress and work out your frustrations. Get a new hairstyle and buy a new wardrobe. You need to make new changes to your life and that's a good place to start. 1
Author Mehndi1983 Posted March 30, 2012 Author Posted March 30, 2012 I want you to understand one thing. NO GUY IS WORTH ENDING YOOUR LIFE OVER!!! If those feelings are creeping back in there and you need help, go to the Emergency Room. Get help to get you through this, and talk to your doctor. Now, with that said, one of the first things you need to do is change the apartment. Redecorate the whole thing. New coat of paint on the walls and move the furnature around. Make it soo different that you think you're in a new apartment. Believe me, it does wonders. Now, it's time to work on you. Get a membership to a gym and start working out. Run on the treadmill and start pushing weight. It's a great way to handle stress and work out your frustrations. Get a new hairstyle and buy a new wardrobe. You need to make new changes to your life and that's a good place to start. Thank you Chi Town! Your words mean alot to me. I did go to the hospital last night and for safety they kept me over night. I'm back home and things still hurt. I love everyone's idea of redecorating the apartment and I think I will do that. As well as just taking care of myself. Just weeks ago he said that he was ready to give me the things I wanted (ie- house, marriage and kids) so we started looking together. Just thinking of that statement is what hurts so much as things were getting better with the depression and anxiety that I have been fighting with. He still contacts me to find out when he can pick up the remainder of his stuff and I'm just not ready to see him anymore. The thought of him eventually finding someone else eats away at me. How do I let these feelings go when I'm scared to move on without him. I really do appreciate everyone's response and I will take them all to heart!
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