itsalllove Posted March 29, 2012 Posted March 29, 2012 Breaking up is a b****. No lie, if you read my previous posts, you'll see I've been extremely down about it since it happened about two weeks ago. But you know what... This morning I woke up feeling... I don't know... great. Like really optimistic and hopeful for the future... ALONE. Yup, yesterday I wanted her back... and days before I wanted her back badly... but today... today I just wanna have fun. Meet women, party, and live. That's something that's been missing from my life for the past three years we've been together. And I guess I write this thread to say to you, the one that's feeling sad, powerless, and horrible... it get's better. I promise. Take it day by day. I'm not in no way cured, but you got to focus on you and what you can do to make your life better. Trust me, it's not easy AT ALL but in a way, you got to take control at some point. I'm also doing NC, and I believe this has helped me to get over her faster, also meeting new girls and just having a good time doesn't hurt either . So... take it from me, a person you've never met in your life... it does get better... and if it doesn't... MAKE it better. 2
Exit Posted March 29, 2012 Posted March 29, 2012 Agreed. I just said this in someone else's thread earlier today, but I'll say it again, I'm the most tragic/hopeless romantic type person out there. I never know when to give up, it takes me forever to get over someone, and any time I've gone through a breakup has been extremely depressing for me, but even I start to feel better eventually. Been over 4 months now and I'm not completely there, thinking about what happened can still bring up some intense emotions for me, but I don't think about her constantly, I'm starting to have fun doing other things, I'm actually really excited to meet someone new, although I'm not sure when that will happen or if I'm even ready, but at least my mind is over the "it has to be her!" stage. If I can get there, you all can too, trust me you could ask anyone in my life and they would tell you I take break-ups worse than anyone they know and that it's annoying to deal with me while I'm being all depressed and pathetic about it. Even I feel better, eventually. You can try the whole "go out with friends" or "get a new hobby" thing, but really it's just going to suck as long as it wants to, time really is the only healer, and yes that involves NC, if I was still emailing my ex and having a heartattack every time I check my inbox I'm sure this would still feel like day 1. I've gone out with friends to try having fun and found myself still down and thinking about her, I've kept up with my hobbies and still thought about her, all those tips are great but really you just gotta keep going until you wake up one day and realize they aren't the first thing you thought about that day, and it continues to get better from there.
blindesided Posted March 30, 2012 Posted March 30, 2012 Great words of wisdome Exit - yes we all know to stay busy....etc... but yes like you - sometimes being around friends or going out makes it worse at times - its like I felt I was just pretending - my thoughts were always on him. I am glad to see that time does help - i know deep down it does - but its hard to believe it when thr pai is so great right now
Author itsalllove Posted March 30, 2012 Author Posted March 30, 2012 Yes, time does help. And you know what? Sometimes you'll realize that you don't want that person as bad as you thought and you'll see them for what it is, or who they are based on their behavior. It's hard as hell, that's not a secret. But there's so many people out there, why stress over one person? Yea, it's easier said than done TRUST ME. Eventually you just won't give a f***, just to be blunt:cool: seriously. And when you reach the level where you don't give a lick, you'll get stronger, more confident, and it'll spread like a virus because somehow, someway, your ex will find out you're not a sick puppy anymore. That you're not on their sh** anymore. Believe me. I had contacted my ex because I felt good and said to myself "I don't want her anymore". SO I felt comfortable talking to her... but check this out, she didn't feel comfortable talking to me. It made her uneasy and she didn't say this, she showed it in her actions, and eventually tried to get me back on her sh** by not textin' me back. I know the game... so I went out gracefully and said "I see you're not ready to be cool yet, so maybe we'll speak in the future, gn" and that's it. I don't need to feel like I'm "sweatin'" someone, you know? And neither do any of you. It's a waste of time. Focus on you, forget them, and keep moving. Get out and meet ppl, no matter how much it sucks, you gotta get out of that life you lived with your ex, cuz it doesn't exist anymore.
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