biancak Posted March 27, 2012 Posted March 27, 2012 Hello everyone, i did something bad,and i feel really bad about it. My boyfriend and i have many friends in common,and one of them lets call him A is his best friend and one of my best friends,he is normally a good friend to the both of us he doesn't take sides,and he gives us advice and good ones when its necessary. He always teases me on my virginity but he says its a good thing because its rare in these days,and my boyfriend is okay with me not wanting to have sex until i am ready,i am 22 years old,and i have only kissed 2 people in my life.He always tells me details about his sexual life, and it has never been a problem since him and i are very close and comfortable with each other. 3 weeks ago,we were talking about penis,so i asked him if they was an average size,and when people say someone has a big or long one,what is compared too. Then he offered to send me a photo of his,since people say its big,i refused, i told him i wouldnt be able to look him in the eye again,he told me that i was being silly,because him and i are so close,that if he saw me naked he wouldn't even make it a big deal out of it. But i said no thank you. Yesterday the conversation came up again,and this time i accepted the pic(and yes it is really big,i was chocked),and in return i sent him a pic of my butt. But i felt horrible afterwards,i told him i just betrayed my boyfriend,and i am not like that,he told me that i was making this a big deal out of nothing,that for him and i am his best girl friend and he feels confortable enough with me to share that kind of pic,and that he would never hurt my boyfriend that if we had kissed and had sex then that would be the problem,but the pictures werent anything big,he wanted to just show me so that i can have an idea and stop wondering about sizes. I cant blame him,i have a brain and i had used it the first time,but yesterday its like it wasnt there,i dont know what gotten into me,i feel horrible,like a traitor. What am i suppose to do? I trust him and i know that he deleted the picture after looking at it like we promised each other but i cant help it,i feel so so bad.I betrayed my boyfriend. I am sorry if there is anyone here who feels mad or upset about this,but i promise you i am not a bad girl normally,but feel like one right now.Please help me
Philosoraptor Posted March 27, 2012 Posted March 27, 2012 You had a boundary of your own and you crossed it. We all do things that we wouldn't usually be comfortable with, just let it go. How long have you two been dating?
Lauriebell82 Posted March 28, 2012 Posted March 28, 2012 What made you change your mind about receiving the picture? Regardless, your guy friend doesn't sound like too great of a friend to put that kind of pressure on you to do something that you KNEW was wrong. Sounds like he is trying to get you to cheat on your boyfriend with him, and this was his first step in "loosening" you up. He manipulated you by saying this "wasn't as bad" as kissing or having sex. Next he will be saying that if you have sex it would only be "one time" so it wouldn't be that big of a deal. He sounds like a jerk and a sleeze. I'd stop hanging out with him if I were you... It's up to you if you can live with this. Part of me thinks you should tell your boyfriend because he deserves to know what kind of relationship you have with your guy friend. Part of me thinks that if you know you were wrong and really don't want to do anything else to betray your boyfriend then you need to cut ties with your friend and focus on your relationship.
FitChick Posted March 29, 2012 Posted March 29, 2012 Let's hope this "friend" doesn't try to blackmail you into doing and showing more under threat of telling your boyfriend. If you want to see photos of naked men, just go online and look at the gay porn sites.
Philosoraptor Posted March 29, 2012 Posted March 29, 2012 Oh wow I read this wrong. I thought you crossed a sexual boundary with your partner and missed the friend part. Yea, you caused a big problem and this could come back to haunt you. You should be up front and honest with your partner now before he has to hear it from someone else.
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