He Won't Talk to Me...and My Ex is Back

[MySweetie'sGone]

The guy I'v e been talking to for the past two years is no longer talking to me. This week at work they told him he couldn't use his cell at work. But I've still made comments about it seeming like he doesn't want to talk to me when he's off. Nothing mean. Then Friday morning I asked him to call me and he immediately responded with ok. but never called. At 4 I asked what time could I expect his call. No answer. I called him at 7 when I was out with a friend. At 11 pm I finally called again. No answer. So I texted him "really???"

 

Tried a couple more times and the phone would ring like 3 times then go to vm. So he was hitting ignore. Idk if he thought I wanted to talk about our relationship or what - but I was just trying to tell him about this job I'd found for him bc he'd been talking about wanting a new one and I was excited. The last time I called, I left him an angry vm and I was crying and said I was tired of being treated like **** and what had I done to deserve to be treated like this. 2 hours later I get a call from him. I try to call him back twice. No answer. I finally listen to the vm he left and it's slow music playing in the background and rustling for 9 secs and then it cuts off.

 

The next morning I messed up bc I was angry and asked did he accidentally leave me a vm of him having sex with someone else. I asked him to just text me if it's over between us if he no longer wants to talk to me and I have heard nothing from him. at all. About 3 weeks ago we talked and he told me how he cares about me more than words can say and doesn't want to hurt me, etc. But now this. I know I prob messed up with the multiple calls and texts, but idk what to do. It's going on 3 days with no real response from him. i would think that after two years he would at least tell me it's over vs. just not talking to me?? I've always been there for him, never judged him and I can't even get a text telling me it's over?

 

We've had issues before, regarding communication always small - but he's never just not responded. If it was over wouldn't it be easy for him to text me so? Esp since I've always emphasized to him that if that's ever the case just let me know? It's going on 3 days and I'm really upset. Feel like every move I make is the wrong one...

 

And now that he's acting this way, my ex from 2 years ago is back in full force and wants to get back to what we had...but I feel nothing for him. I want this guy. What do I do? Was what I did/said so wrong? He used to get in knock-down arguments with his ex - but I'm not allowed to get upset without this happening? His grandad died new year's his dog 3 weeks ago and his stepfather week before last. I've been there for him throughout. This week I got selfish bc it seemed like he was shutting me out...guess I pushed him too far?

Edited March 27, 2012 by MySweetie'sGone
added details

[Jono85]

this is from the outside looking in, ie. just my impressions reading this post, but you might want to tone down the whole 'crazy-b*tch' vibes your giving. you may have already changed his image of you permanently, hopefully not. i mean we all have had these times at one point or another (to varying degrees of course), but it's really not a preferred course of action and is almost always 100% regretted afterwards by us all.

 

PLEASE start giving him space. STOP chasing him. he CLEARLY is annoyed by your constant, stalkerish, texts and calls. please start having some self respect and PRETEND like you can get a better guy if he chooses not to take you back. right now aside from the crazy-b*tch vibe, you'r also sending a very 'desperate and i can never do better' vibe.

 

sorry for the harshness, but it's what you need to hear imo. i'm confident you can bounce back from this, just start respecting yourself. you don't need him!

[Chi townD]

Let him go. I mean, he butt dialed you while he was having sex for christ sakes!! If he isn't man enough to answer you calls then he isn't worth your time. He's a coward. Go NC on him and IGNORE ANY TEXT, PHONECALLS OR EMAILS!!!! I'm a guy and I guarantee you he's looking for nothing more than a booty call. Heal and move on.

 

And with your Ex sniffing around? There's a reason our Ex's are our Ex's

[Me...IamMe]

If you are the type of woman that calls repeatedly and really has nothing to say, I have to tell you this. Save it for when you see him. Calling once in awhile is cool. Calling before work, at coffee break, at lunch, on the way home from work, when you get home. What the hell are we supposed to say when we are with you? An ex would do this all the time and then would ask why I didn't talk to her. It was because my mind was blank. There was nothing more to say so I would go watch the news. As far as him not answering, I know why. He has had a rough go and you are acting like it is all about you. His dad, his grandpa, his frickin' dog just died and you yell at him? An ex did the same thing when I hit a rough spot. He's burnt and all he hears from you is bitc hing. Give him a breather or just show him you actually care about what he has been thru. Guys don't like getting help, especially from a bitchy woman. Not trying to be mean. Just sayin'

[M2155]

Totally agree, fall back. I did this too and I realized it way too late. The worst was realizing in my relationship when in the beginning he was the initiator and toward the end I was doing all the calling and he realized he never had to. If someone is ignoring you, keep it moving! They know you called, now they know they can take their time because you'll continue to call. Maybe I'm venting here too:cool:. The me now would have just stent the text saying i wanted to let you know about this job i heard about when you get a sec. Hope your day is going great." Please give him some space. I'd initiate contact maybe once in a week if you're still together (I'm confused about that part) and just say something flirty/nice that doesn't require a response...and don't wait for one. It will take time for him to stop expecting your contact.

 

LOL at ex coming back two yrs later, true to form after you no longer care.