dtmpct Posted March 26, 2012 Posted March 26, 2012 A little over two years ago, I went through a very messy break up, one in which I got very hurt after a 3 year relationship. While it seemed to take me a very long time to get over her, I did get over her, and I am now in another relationship. Here's the issue... I will be doing a work-related retreat this summer for two months. It involves about 100 people -- we all work together every day, and live together in a couple of different apartment buildings. I just found out that my ex will be attending this summer. So I will be in the same program with her, seeing her every day, living in close proximity and socializing in the same circles for two months. I am VERY concerned about this. I'm worried about past feelings/issues coming up, being uncomfortable, etc. I would greatly appreciate any sort of advice on this problem...I'm feeling pretty lost right now.
Philosoraptor Posted March 26, 2012 Posted March 26, 2012 If you are both over the end of the relationship then you might find a friendship. If one of you is over the other and the other is not; one of you will likely feel horrible watching the other live it up. If neither of you are over things you will get back together and go through the ending process again as not being over the past would lead to the same relationship that already failed once.
CaliBabe Posted March 26, 2012 Posted March 26, 2012 Is it possible to get out of the retreat just to be on the safe side?
Sophie99 Posted March 26, 2012 Posted March 26, 2012 As long as you are truly over her, and she is, I think it should be fine. If you're not up for being friends, just be polite Maybe it's worth mentioning it to your current girlfriend if you haven't already, you don't want her finding out through someone else
EgoJoe Posted March 26, 2012 Posted March 26, 2012 Better plan! Tough it out and don't let her affect you. To her face you're amicable, distant and a stranger. In private you brush it off as lingering feelings. If she approaches you to talk you say, "No." If she gets upset you laugh. Otherwise, focus on you. Your new girlfriend does not need to know about this. Handle it with dignity, righteousness and compassion like a man and keep going.
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