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Karma? Does anyone have any good stories about ex's who got what the deserve?


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Posted

Ok, so I'm pretty bitter right now and I know its not healthy but no amount of inspirational quotes are going to let it pass any quicker. Time heals, i get that.

 

But the purpose of this thread is that I want to hear about ex's or if you are an ex, about how something backfired. In other words, you dumped your ex under circumstances that weren't very nice, for someone who you thought was your soulmate/ love of your life, only to realise they weren't the one. Or your ex ending things terribly with you and later the next relationship was as "perfect" as he thought it would be.

 

how long until you realised what happened, and what happened?

  • Like 2
Posted
Ok, so I'm pretty bitter right now and I know its not healthy but no amount of inspirational quotes are going to let it pass any quicker. Time heals, i get that.

 

But the purpose of this thread is that I want to hear about ex's or if you are an ex, about how something backfired. In other words, you dumped your ex under circumstances that weren't very nice, for someone who you thought was your soulmate/ love of your life, only to realise they weren't the one. Or your ex ending things terribly with you and later the next relationship was as "perfect" as he thought it would be.

 

how long until you realised what happened, and what happened?

 

Well my ex. dumped me for her ex. after dating almost 1 year. They had broken up several time previously (when I wasn't involved) and she felt she had to go back...that it was her fault and I guess to "fix" things.

 

6 months ago she contacts me with sorrys...regrets etc. and from what I understand they broke up AGAIN.

 

I believe that after all the excitement...the desire to get back with him died then she realized how well I treated her....how good I was to her she now regrets dumping me.

 

Oh well....her loss!

  • Like 6
Posted

Mike...I won't get into the whole story here, but my soon to be ex...always put his daughter and ex wife before me, under any circumstance (this and his drinking is why I left). Well he found out about 6 weeks ago that they will be moving about 2000 miles away in a few months and I left him 5 weeks ago. So all the sh*t he put me through with them....and now he will be all alone.

 

He may find another, because he's needy like that, but the thought that they will be soooooo far away and he will be hurting like h*ll, just fills me with absolute joy. Of course, there is still a few months left of happiness for him, but it will be short lived.

 

Immature? Maybe I am, but since I'm hurting and angry...I'll take it!!! Karma? Put the h*ll to the yeah. :p

  • Like 1
Posted
Mike...I won't get into the whole story here, but my soon to be ex...always put his daughter and ex wife before me, under any circumstance (this and his drinking is why I left). Well he found out about 6 weeks ago that they will be moving about 2000 miles away in a few months and I left him 5 weeks ago. So all the sh*t he put me through with them....and now he will be all alone.

 

He may find another, because he's needy like that, but the thought that they will be soooooo far away and he will be hurting like h*ll, just fills me with absolute joy. Of course, there is still a few months left of happiness for him, but it will be short lived.

 

Immature? Maybe I am, but since I'm hurting and angry...I'll take it!!! Karma? Put the h*ll to the yeah. :p

 

Yeah...I relalized later on that my ex. ALWAYS put herself over me..she was selfish...I did sooo much for her but got so little in return!

 

I'll chalk it up to a lesson learned....never again....I'll come first without be to selfish next time!!

Posted

Same here.....I was always #1 if he had nothing else to do and he gave...when/what was convienent to him. I don't want that kind of r/s anymore. When i've healed and ready to meet someone else the first Big red flag and I'm done. Why try to fit a round peg into a square hole, ya know?

Posted

I had a 2 1/2-year relationship with an abusive alcoholic. I stayed with him because we had a business together that made obscene amounts of money and I didn't want to give up the jet-setting lifestyle we had established.

 

I finally couldn't stand his lies, prostitutes, drug and alcohol use and the whole lifestyle and I broke up with him. It took me a full year to get over the hurt and another two years after that before I could start a healthy relationship.

 

I have learned since we broke up (in the middle of 2008), he has gone from living the high life to being on skid row. Literally... He is living at a Salvation Army half-way house and can't pull himself out of the cycle of destruction.

 

Is that karma? I don't know and his demise gave me a smug satisfaction for a while, but now I just feel sorry for him.

  • Like 3
Posted

This thread gives me hope. It's been 18 months, ex contacted me in August, but then found someone new around Dec/Jan of this year on one of his many dating sites. From what it looks like, he is happy, but it's all so much so fast--as is his style. A friend said just watch this one unravel, knowing how he is. He is extremely needy and wants a woman with a good income--he wants to replace what he lost in his divorce a few years back---it's all he would talk about, how his ex made good money and how he misses that extra income. We shall see. Every dog has his day...I think....Maybe my ex will be unscathed. Sometimes the truly evil ones get away with it. He did get really, really heavy though...must be all that cardio and soy milk he bragged about, LOL!!!

  • Like 1
Posted

My story was a little different and many years ago. But the girl I was supposed to marry cheated on me. When I caught her. She told me I was unmotivated, never going to college, loser, working dead end jobs and going nowhere in life. And she was going with someone that had goals in life.

 

I was devestated and in a major funk until a friend of mine pulled me on a train and spent a weekend in St. Louis. When I got back, I got motivated. I started working out. I did end up in College and a LOT of it. I found I loved the challenge of it. During breaks I would travel, go places and see new things. Meet new people along the way. I got a job after I graduated and became successful in my field and career and I met my wife along the way. A very beautiful and professional woman that has a heart ten times greater than my Ex. I own my own house in the burbs with a nice car and my wife shares my passion for travel. I've been on every continent except for two. I've seen most of the world and I want to see the rest of it!

 

What happened to my Ex? Last I heard was she ended up married to the guy she cheated on me with. But, He was in College and had to transfer to the University of I'm pregnant and you need to get a job. I believe he became an ambulance driver. So, I proved her wrong. I have a good life. SO, Karma hit her square in the eyes because she was wrong about me. I proved that I'm not everything she told me I was. SO, now I have a great, adventurious and comfortable life, and she's just getting by. Little karma and a little revenge.

  • Like 5
Posted

I know karma has hit me. I was in a five year relationship that i got into at the end of my marriage. i shouldnt have probably got involved right away with someone else, but he was a really nice guy, who i knew wouldnt cheat on me. (my ex hubby did) so, i felt safe and secure, which is what i needed at the time. but, we were better as friends, and the passion was minimal even early on. we did everything together, and never argued. he was kinda impassive and not real open, but he was loyal, steadfast, and laid back. in short, he was a good guy, but maybe not the guy for me.

 

I ended up getting emotionally tangled with a guy online, from an online game, that we had met in person. he was friends with my "nice guy" and had mutual friends with him.

 

im not proud of it, but, i broke up with the nice guy for this guy i really didnt know well. the nice guy helped move my stuff into my own apartment and everything. (i lived with the nice guy until the break up) i told him about it, and he was hurt, but admitted that he had been distancing himself from me assuming i would leave, only a matter of time.

 

so, i went to my own place, and the new guy, moved to seattle, and i went to see him, and then would go back to my place. well, eventually, he was pressuring me to let him move into my place. (big mistake). new guy was the opposite of the nice guy. in better shape, a-hole swagger, opinionated, argumentative, emotional.

 

long story short, the new guy was verbally abusive, and eventually on the way to being physically abusive, and the police were called, and i had my locks changed. who was there for me while i was scared and worried about his threat on my life? my nice guy. he let me stay at his place for a night, on his couch. i'm still friends with him to this day. but, i learned something. that was my grass is greener thing. it wasn't greener. Me and the nice guy would've broken up eventually just because we werent a good fit, but i always regretted how it happened, and i always felt a bit of karma, in that he was the better person. he is now in a relationship with an awesome girlfriend, and i have now been left brutally and am single. :)

 

so yeah, i believe in karma.

Posted

Other's Karma is not my business.

 

Point is, I've never felt great about sharing or congratulating the misfortunes of others.

 

Have some class. And some compassion. Remember, it applies to everyone. Just my opinion.

  • Like 4
Posted

I have a story, but it goes back almost 25 years:) My then b/f started out sweet and kind, but he had awful mood swings and would often yell/curse/scream at me, then go back to being kind without batting an eye. He would later start getting physical and then dumped me; he just disappeared; had no clue I was dumped until after numerous calls *unanswered; he came out of hiding I guess.

 

I was naive and had no idea he was hooked on drugs and was also bipolar/schizophrenic, and did not take his meds. Coke was just fine with him. When it was over, I grieved, but moved on to greener pastures and better things. He tried coming back, but by that time I was healed and frankly, he scared the bejesus out of me. I never saw him again....Until....

 

Last year on Facebook! An old classmate/mutual friend told me he was on there and in his bio, he told his life story and admitted he was mentally sick, but getting the aid and meds he needs. His life is a shambles, still in the old, dangerous hood we grew up in, has no money. He looks like he hasn't aged which is cool. I got to talking with him again and let me tell you that seeing him admit he was sick and getting help really hit a chord with me.

 

He's fun to talk to again, but I feel awful for the lifestyle to which he is living. He told me he is ashamed to bring his new love interest into his apartment which is infested with rodents and it needs serious repair. He is the only fellow I never wished 'karma' on; I moved on from him and met new jerks, LOL, but I moved on.

 

I wish I had that kind of feeling today. Just move on and not occurring me to wish this new ex had some kind of come to Jesus moment. But, it is natural to wish that. No one here is a bad person for wishing a little something came to the ex for intentional harm. If the truth be known, it helps to vent it out; we say things out of bitterness and anger, but then eventually that stuff clears and it doesn't occur to us to even think of that stuff.

Posted

I don't think there's anything wrong with this post either. We're all hurting a little. I miss my X, I would love for him to call me and say "I'm stupid, I don't know what I'm doing..." but there is a part of me that hopes that when he meets his next "wife to be" that he wishes he hadn't let US go.

 

I think we're entitled to a little selfish self satisfaction right about now. And no one has to know about it but us. ;)

  • Like 2
  • Author
Posted

Hey Mike, did your girlfriend keep in touch with her ex? Or did she decide out of the blue to meet up with him.Well done for not going back!

 

And yeah to everyone, it is cool when karma basically means that those of us that got abused or neglected end up better for it!

  • Author
Posted

hey cflowers32 exactly!!

 

It's the same when people gossip or stand around at accidents. We cant help it. Part of healing is getting angry- well, karma helps cope with anger :p

  • Like 2
Posted
Hey Mike, did your girlfriend keep in touch with her ex? Or did she decide out of the blue to meet up with him.Well done for not going back!

 

And yeah to everyone, it is cool when karma basically means that those of us that got abused or neglected end up better for it!

 

I guess I'll never know the real truth about it all. She told me when we started dating he just up and walked out after a fight and she tried to contact him to "talk it over" but he never responded.

 

She dumped me on a Sunday and she told me that he texted her the night before saying..Love you..miss you and that's all it took for her.

 

I believe something had been going on long before that though and she was mulling it over on what to do?

Posted
hey cflowers32 exactly!!

 

It's the same when people gossip or stand around at accidents. We cant help it. Part of healing is getting angry- well, karma helps cope with anger :p

 

Lol!! True. :)

  • Like 1
Posted

Well.. Not karma but after we broke up, he texted me awhile later saying he was miserable and has no idea what's going on with his life or what he wants to do..

Posted
I know karma has hit me. I was in a five year relationship that i got into at the end of my marriage. i shouldnt have probably got involved right away with someone else, but he was a really nice guy, who i knew wouldnt cheat on me. (my ex hubby did) so, i felt safe and secure, which is what i needed at the time. but, we were better as friends, and the passion was minimal even early on. we did everything together, and never argued. he was kinda impassive and not real open, but he was loyal, steadfast, and laid back. in short, he was a good guy, but maybe not the guy for me.

 

I ended up getting emotionally tangled with a guy online, from an online game, that we had met in person. he was friends with my "nice guy" and had mutual friends with him.

 

im not proud of it, but, i broke up with the nice guy for this guy i really didnt know well. the nice guy helped move my stuff into my own apartment and everything. (i lived with the nice guy until the break up) i told him about it, and he was hurt, but admitted that he had been distancing himself from me assuming i would leave, only a matter of time.

 

so, i went to my own place, and the new guy, moved to seattle, and i went to see him, and then would go back to my place. well, eventually, he was pressuring me to let him move into my place. (big mistake). new guy was the opposite of the nice guy. in better shape, a-hole swagger, opinionated, argumentative, emotional.

 

long story short, the new guy was verbally abusive, and eventually on the way to being physically abusive, and the police were called, and i had my locks changed. who was there for me while i was scared and worried about his threat on my life? my nice guy. he let me stay at his place for a night, on his couch. i'm still friends with him to this day. but, i learned something. that was my grass is greener thing. it wasn't greener. Me and the nice guy would've broken up eventually just because we werent a good fit, but i always regretted how it happened, and i always felt a bit of karma, in that he was the better person. he is now in a relationship with an awesome girlfriend, and i have now been left brutally and am single. :)

 

so yeah, i believe in karma.

 

I have a similar story. Broke up with a wonderful woman who would have made a great wife. Didn't have anybody else in mind at the time, just wanted freedom. Couple of years later, she is married and pregnant. Very happy that she found a great guy, but very unhappy with myself for tossing her back. Latest relationship really taught me what I had back then.

Posted

I dated a girl once. She broke up with me because I didn't think it was a good idea to move out of state. I tried to tell her that moving was a bad idea and she would end up in a bad position. About 4 months later, she contacted me saying she got fired from her job she moved for.

Posted

I've talked about this before, but in answer to your question, I will try to make this short and sweet.

 

My ex dangled a carrot in front of me for 3 years, spending little time with me, sometimes only once a month. His excuses were: spending time with his midly autistic son, working hard, no money. I lived 50 miles away from him and I do not drive. He was homeless for a long time, and then living in the basement of his ex-wife's house. I was not allowed to come over. He said he could not email me because she was always on the computer.

I tried to understand and support him.

 

He finally got a job with wonderful hours. Instead of finally, finally spending a nice amount of time with me, he used his extra time to look for other woman and then ignore me, using his autistic son in his lies. He cheated on me with a woman who lived in my city. He traveled from his city to my city to see her. Then later would tell me he didn't have money to come and see me. He would email her. He offered to be her email pal at first, although he never emailed me because he said his ex-wife was always on the computer and he could not. In the relationship there were many, many, many lies told by him and many, many tears shed by me. After I left him, he threw this woman in my face via phone and a letter. He threw her in my face again, and again, and again. Then he harassed me to the point that I had to contact the police.

 

About two months after I left him, he got very sick...so sick he had to give up sole custody he had of his son and his running career was over. The woman he cheated on me with left him, then took him back and told him she would marry him in the Spring. They didn't even make it 4 more months. They broke up again. He had to go back to the job he had with the bad hours. He got so sick he made out his will. He got even sicker and now he's in and out of the emergency room and ICU all of the time.

Posted

This was about 7 years ago but I dated a guy for 2 years, we broke up and I begged for him back, never worked. After a month, he tried to beg for me back, I had moved on. He started getting into pills and heroin, and went to rehab for a bit. A week ago, I was at a coffee shop and he walked in, he looked like he was homeless. We don't talk anymore, but I was glad to have closed that guy out of my life. He never really changed, he looks truly lost like something is wrong with him mentally. He has no friends, lives in the garage of his parents house and looks like a lost cause. He's very unhappy from what I heard. One of his exes after me got married, and he's now still in love with some girl who is a lesbian. I don't wish any of this on him, but just a story I thought I'd share, happy to be where I am now than with him though.

Posted

Well is this karma? Before my ex and I were exclusive, I was also casually dating someone else. I totally couldn't choose which one I liked more. The other guy was a few years older than me. I thought maybe I needed to date more and thought this could be an issue if there was a future. I was 22/ 23 he was almost 30. I also worried coz they live in the same suburb. I ended up choosing my ex. I told the other guy I had become exclusive with someone else. And I wished him good luck. He said he'll stay in touch, but he never did. A year later my jerk of an ex dumped me anyway and cruelly. I have what ifs. I deleted the other guys number and we don't have mutual friends. And he stopped going to the place I met him, coz I wasn't there.

Posted

it happened to me i finished with her then she cried for a week then found some new punk of a fella shes with him constant. then i found out then she led me on for a few weeks while secertly seeing this guy we even got back together a coupe of time but i knew he was stll there. i think she is massively confused being with him avoids me in her mind we where very ver srtongly in love and i think we still are. but in a way i got hat i deserved and i now relaize what a selfish stuborn prick ave been. i hope she just realizis that if she comes back it will be different

Posted

about a year and a half ago I broke up with my ex, he was really devastated and I tried to be nice and understand but realizing I couldn't be the one to put him together I cut him out

 

we recently started talking again as friends, and I recently got dumped... I told him; now I know how you felt, it does suck horrible

Posted

Karma (or kamma, in Pali) simply means Volitional action.

 

That is, any action which is pre-meditated and deliberate.

 

It can be carried out in 3 ways;

Through what we think, through what we say, and through what we do.

Kamma has consequences (Vipaka).

 

"What goes around comes around" is both over-simplistic and inaccurate.

 

And what people forget, is that we all generate Kamma-Vipaka. Whether you believe in it or not, is immaterial.

Kamma is a natural process happening all the time, to everyone.

 

It's not judgemental, it doesn't evaluate, it's not "a force to be reckoned with", it's not revenge, it's not pay-back.

 

Kamma Just Is.

You act, and you get a consequence.

Be it positive, negative or neutral.

Be it immediate or "down the line".

 

The trick it to first and foremost,m watch the thinking.

That's where it all begins.

With what you think.

 

Amend the thought to become positive or neutral, and the rest follows accordingly.

 

If you develop a thought into formulating words, or enacting deeds, then you build the consequences.

 

I once contributed in exactly this vein in another thread, and somebody came back with a comment along the lines of:

 

"Oh right, TM, well we get what you as a Buddhist are defining as Karma, but we don't mean that kind, the kind we mean is payback, kick in the pants stuff".

 

"Fine," I replied.

"But then, it's not karma.

So either use the term accurately, or don't bother, because you merely perpetuate ignorance, which makes you misunderstood and inaccurate. It also belittles the Dhamma (teachings of the Buddha) which is mildly disrespectful, and makes light of something Buddhists take very seriously."

 

Just my 2 cents.....

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